TU161: Managing Unconscious Defense & Fear with Ann Kelley PhD and Sue Marriott LCSW, CGP

TU161: Managing Unconscious Defense & Fear with Ann Kelley PhD and Sue Marriott LCSW, CGP

Season 6 Premiere! Move from defense and fear

It’s been a ride, but hosts Sue Marriott and Ann Kelley are back in full force and ready for this exciting season. In this episode, we catch up with you and discuss the depths of the defensive process and how to resource ourselves to put down the walls we don’t even mean to put up. Cis-women are socialized to subsume themselves to others’ needs and Ann and Sue are no exception. They are working on holding their own voice and letting their little light shine freely. Watch this 3 min clip to see what we mean and to get into the spirit yourself! 🙂

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Acfc2gUErI

Content-wise, they discuss the difference between cognitive understanding of modern attachment and regulation, and the bottom-up experience of it. We distort information coming in – either by not registering interpersonal information (dismissing/blue side of the spectrum) or by over-interpreting the importance of an exchange (up-regulating with fear). This is an unconscious process that to undo we have to have the courage and the resources to feel the feelings that cause us to defend. They walk through it with you – they don’t just tell you what to do – so join us in understanding our own defensive process.

Check out our recent replays for a refresher on each of the attachment styles:

TU158

TU159

TU160

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Episoder(291)

TU123 – Narratives of Fear: George Floyd, Protest, and Community Empowerment with Dr. Raphael Travis

TU123 – Narratives of Fear: George Floyd, Protest, and Community Empowerment with Dr. Raphael Travis

George Floyd. Breonna Taylor. Tony McDade. Sandra Bland. Rayshard Brooks. Tamir Rice. Emmett Till… and so on. The violence enacted by the criminal justice system isn’t new, so what makes this moment f...

22 Jun 202051min

TU122: Loving & Living with Adult Attention Deficit Disorder (or ADHD) with Ari Tuckman

TU122: Loving & Living with Adult Attention Deficit Disorder (or ADHD) with Ari Tuckman

When we think of ADHD, we often imagine a restless & fidgety child who loses focus rather than the grown up parent or partner these kids eventually become. It is a legit neurological condition – yet a...

19 Mai 202058min

TU121: Redefining the Purpose of Relationships During Quarantine with Stan Tatkin

TU121: Redefining the Purpose of Relationships During Quarantine with Stan Tatkin

With the tsunami of unclear and contradictory yet potentially life-threatening information coming at us right now in quaratine – it’s no wonder there is so much conflict within groups that are/were qu...

8 Mai 202053min

TU120: Finding Security and Healing Attachment with Dr. David Elliott

TU120: Finding Security and Healing Attachment with Dr. David Elliott

Use a proven mindfulness-based technique of imagery to cope with quarantine and promote healing. Is this pandemic making your nervous system crunchy? Let’s work on some healing techniques in the mean ...

27 Apr 202048min

TU119: For the Love of Men, Rethinking Masculinity with Liz Plank

TU119: For the Love of Men, Rethinking Masculinity with Liz Plank

It isn’t a war between the genders, it’s a war between those interested in freedom of individual expression and equality, and those wedded to and defending the patriarchal script. “I measure activism ...

8 Apr 202050min

TU118: Mental Health Support During this Damn Coronavirus Pandemic

TU118: Mental Health Support During this Damn Coronavirus Pandemic

Calm is contagious, too! Coping through Coronavirus. Our hearts hurt for those affected by COVID. Those who are ill, survivors of those taken by the virus, service employee’s continuing to work, front...

30 Mar 202040min

TU117: Resilience Trauma and the Brain W/ Guest Bruce Perry MD, PhD

TU117: Resilience Trauma and the Brain W/ Guest Bruce Perry MD, PhD

“Regulate, then relate, then reason” -Dr. Bruce Perry In this episode, co-host Sue Marriott speaks with Dr. Bruce Perry, a renowned neuroscientist, psychiatrist, clinician and researcher on children’s...

13 Mar 202057min

TU116: Fight Flight Freeze … and “Fawn”?? Can People-Pleasing Be a Sign of Trauma?

TU116: Fight Flight Freeze … and “Fawn”?? Can People-Pleasing Be a Sign of Trauma?

Freeze Appease Dissociate… Appease is Fawning when it comes to C-PTSD Are you a huge people-pleaser, conflict avoider, peace-keeper? Maybe you are just being nice, but if you are compelled to do it, d...

27 Feb 202029min

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