37 - The Mask You Didn’t Know You Were Wearing

37 - The Mask You Didn’t Know You Were Wearing

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

Why do so many men feel pressure to be strong, silent or always in control — even when it’s hurting them inside?

In this courageous episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs explores the emotional “masks” many men wear to survive societal expectations — and how those masks can quietly feed disconnection, frustration, and unchecked anger.

With thoughtful insight from AI co-hosts Jake and Sarah, this conversation offers a path toward healthier masculinity, deeper relationships, and the kind of strength that comes from taking the mask off.

Key Takeaways:

Emotional masks start as protection — but can become a prison: Roles like the provider, protector or alpha male may help men cope, but when worn constantly, they block real connection and emotional growth.

Anger is often the “acceptable” emotion — but it’s not the only one: Many men struggle to express fear, sadness, or vulnerability. Reclaiming these emotions isn’t weakness — it’s how real healing and closeness begin.

Letting go of old roles opens the door to authenticity: When you stop performing and start showing up as yourself, you create space for real conversations, stronger relationships, and healthier responses to conflict.

You don’t have to do it alone: Whether through friendship, therapy or support programs, finding people you can open up to is one of the most transformative steps a man can take.

Healthy masculinity means emotional awareness, not emotional avoidance: True strength isn’t about hiding pain — it’s about having the courage to face it, express it, and grow from it.

Links referenced in this episode:

angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management

angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Control Your Anger in 7 Days

angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

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Episoder(92)

93 - The Real Reason You Keep Having the Same Argument Again and Again

93 - The Real Reason You Keep Having the Same Argument Again and Again

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.Why do the same arguments keep happening over and over again?Whether it's your partner, your children, a colleague or even a s...

9 Aug 10min

92 - What to Say When Your Partner Is Upset (And Why Nothing You Say Seems to Help)

92 - What to Say When Your Partner Is Upset (And Why Nothing You Say Seems to Help)

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.Your partner is upset. You want to help. But somehow, everything you say seems to make things worse.The problem usually isn't ...

2 Aug 12min

91 - How to Control Anger: The Real Reason You Keep Losing Control

91 - How to Control Anger: The Real Reason You Keep Losing Control

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.If you've ever promised yourself that this time would be different - only to find yourself losing your temper again a few week...

26 Jul 10min

90 - You've Grown Apart: Here’s How to Close the Distance

90 - You've Grown Apart: Here’s How to Close the Distance

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.You've grown apart, but that doesn't mean your relationship is over.Many couples still love each other deeply, yet find themse...

19 Jul 11min

89 - You Can Feel Your Anger Building: Here's What to Do Next

89 - You Can Feel Your Anger Building: Here's What to Do Next

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.You can feel your anger building. Your jaw tightens. Your thoughts get sharper. You know where it's heading, but you don't kno...

12 Jul 11min

88 - Online Anger Management vs Face-to-Face Programs (From Someone Who's Run 2,000+ Sessions)

88 - Online Anger Management vs Face-to-Face Programs (From Someone Who's Run 2,000+ Sessions)

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.Online anger management or face-to-face programs. Which one actually works better?After running more than 2,000 face-to-face a...

5 Jul 9min

87 - Why You're Still Losing It - Even After Trying Everything

87 - Why You're Still Losing It - Even After Trying Everything

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.If your anger keeps coming back no matter how hard you try to control it, the problem may not be your effort. It may be the mi...

28 Jun 14min

86 - How to Tell If You Have Anger Issue

86 - How to Tell If You Have Anger Issue

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.In this episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs walks through seven signs that anger may be causing real problems in your life. Wh...

21 Jun 10min

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