274 - Codependency and Autonomy in Healthy Relationships with Bret and Chalene Johnson CarSmart Edition
The Chalene Show | Diet, Fitness & Life Balance23 Feb 2018

274 - Codependency and Autonomy in Healthy Relationships with Bret and Chalene Johnson CarSmart Edition

ABOUT TODAY’S SHOW:

The Chalene Show is brought to you by The SmartLife™ PUSH Journal is an all-in-one life planner designed to help you become a highly productive, balanced, goal-crushing machine. www.smartlifepushjournal.com

“I think you two are co-dependent” once said a wise therapist. Bret and I stared back at her in disbelief and denial.

This episode of the Chalene Show includes an unscripted and honest conversation between my husband Bret and I, recapping a recent weekend apart. This is significant because not too many years ago, I wouldn’t have dreamed of suggesting we spend the weekend apart. Today, we are in a better place, our relationship is so much healthier.

Healthy relationships take work! I always feel a little weird when I post something in social media and see that well meaning fans have replied with comments like, #RelationshipGoals or “I wish my relationship was like yours”.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to know that people see the relationship that I have with my husband and business partner Bret as inspirational, but I also feel a sense of obligation.

I feel a sense of responsibility to share the true work and progress that has gone into this relationship. While it’s helpful to have relationship role models, it’s unhealthy to use someone else relationship as a measure of the success or potential that your relationship has.

If you’re not getting along, if you struggle to communicate, argue, or just feel disconnected that doesn’t mean your relationship is doomed, it might simply mean you need to seek outside help.

In this episode, Bret and I talk about how early behaviors in our relationship resulted in some pretty serious codependency patterns.

Codependency can take on many forms. When the term was first used to describe our relationship, I was very defensive. I took to the internet to read up on what it meant to be in an unhealthy relationship. It was easy to find definitions that didn’t seem to fit. But there are degrees of codependency and before long I realized that being defensive about the label, wasn’t going to help us.

Growth is something we should all seek. Growth makes us better. When we are better as individuals or better as a couple, we make the world a better place. We experience greater happiness and fulfillment when we work on being better humans. And yes, growth can be uncomfortable, even painful at times, but it always results in improvement.

Embrace growth. Growth is what courageous people do. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. You can’t possibly be an expert at everything. Allow a trained individual to help you navigate this process. While friends and family are important sources of support, they are not trained to help you navigate the experiences of your past and help you to process these things.

You and your partner need time together and time apart. You need to be your own autonomous person with your own interests, friends and pursuits. While It’s incredibly beneficial to share these things as a couple, it’s equally important to have things that are just for you. Your happiness and or emotional state should never be defined or determined by the mood, actions, affection or behaviors of your partner.

A healthy individual doesn’t need the approval, assistance, support or love of someone else to feel whole. While it’s human nature to desire these things, they should never define you or make you feel differently about who you are or your significance.

Codependence can take on many forms and can reveal itself in varying degrees, the worst of which can lead to dangerous and destructive patterns.

Instead of dismissing the notion, consider speaking to a trained professional and seek the counsel of those trained to help you be a better you!!

Thanks for listening! I love you!

Links from today’s episode:

Stop dieting & start living: www.131Method.com

Get the 131 Book!!!

Here’s The System I Use Every Day to be More Organized & Crazy Productive: www.pushjournal.com

Sign Up For MY WEEKLY NEWSLETTER and you'll get FREE tips on how to live a ridiculously amazing fun-filled life!

Be sure you are subscribed to this podcast to automatically receive your episodes!!!

Subscribe to Build Your Tribe!!!

Join our NEW, awesome PodSquad on Facebook here!

Get episode show notes here: www.chalenejohnson.com/podcast

Connect with me on your fav social platform:

Hey! Send me a tweet & tell me what you think about the show! (Use the Hashtag) #TheChaleneShow so I know you’re a homie!

XOXO Chalene

Episoder(1000)

229 - How Much Should You Share in Social Media

229 - How Much Should You Share in Social Media

In this episode Chalene shares with you the do’s and don’ts on what to share on social media. If you think you might share too much or have someone you know that might share to much on their social media. This episode is for you!   Stop dieting & start living: www.131Method.com   Get the 131 Book!!!   Here’s The System I Use Every Day to be More Organized & Crazy Productive: www.pushjournal.com   Sign Up For MY WEEKLY NEWSLETTER and you'll get FREE tips on how to live a ridiculously amazing fun-filled life!   Be sure you are subscribed to this podcast to automatically receive your episodes!!!  Spotify Itunes  Stitcher    Subscribe to Build Your Tribe!!! Spotify  Itunes Stitcher      Join our NEW, awesome PodSquad on Facebook here!   Get episode show notes here: www.chalenejohnson.com/podcast    Connect with me on your fav social platform: SnapChat: ChaleneOfficial    Facebook: www.Facebook.com/Chalene      Instagram: www.Instagram.com/ChaleneJohnson    Twitter: www.Twitter.com/ChaleneJohnson   Hey! Send me a tweet & tell me what you think about the show! (Use the Hashtag) #TheChaleneShow so I know you’re a homie! XOXO Chalene

22 Jan 201730min

228 - How To Have a Butt You Love!!

228 - How To Have a Butt You Love!!

In this episode Chalene shares with you what she has been doing for her workouts lately and why she is sooooo happy with her butt!! No matter if you love your body or you struggle with body imagine, this episode is for you.   Stop dieting & start living: www.131Method.com   Get the 131 Book!!!   Here’s The System I Use Every Day to be More Organized & Crazy Productive: www.pushjournal.com   Sign Up For MY WEEKLY NEWSLETTER and you'll get FREE tips on how to live a ridiculously amazing fun-filled life!   Be sure you are subscribed to this podcast to automatically receive your episodes!!!  Spotify Itunes  Stitcher    Subscribe to Build Your Tribe!!! Spotify  Itunes Stitcher      Join our NEW, awesome PodSquad on Facebook here!   Get episode show notes here: www.chalenejohnson.com/podcast    Connect with me on your fav social platform: SnapChat: ChaleneOfficial    Facebook: www.Facebook.com/Chalene      Instagram: www.Instagram.com/ChaleneJohnson    Twitter: www.Twitter.com/ChaleneJohnson   Hey! Send me a tweet & tell me what you think about the show! (Use the Hashtag) #TheChaleneShow so I know you’re a homie! XOXO Chalene

10 Jan 201727min

227 - The Key to Getting Organized, Productive, happy and healthy!

227 - The Key to Getting Organized, Productive, happy and healthy!

In this episode Chalene teaches you how to get control of your life and her system of goals setting. If you want to have a happy and productive new year this episode is for you!!   Stop dieting & start living: www.131Method.com   Get the 131 Book!!!   Here’s The System I Use Every Day to be More Organized & Crazy Productive: www.pushjournal.com   Sign Up For MY WEEKLY NEWSLETTER and you'll get FREE tips on how to live a ridiculously amazing fun-filled life!   Be sure you are subscribed to this podcast to automatically receive your episodes!!!  Spotify Itunes  Stitcher    Subscribe to Build Your Tribe!!! Spotify  Itunes Stitcher      Join our NEW, awesome PodSquad on Facebook here!   Get episode show notes here: www.chalenejohnson.com/podcast    Connect with me on your fav social platform: SnapChat: ChaleneOfficial    Facebook: www.Facebook.com/Chalene      Instagram: www.Instagram.com/ChaleneJohnson    Twitter: www.Twitter.com/ChaleneJohnson   Hey! Send me a tweet & tell me what you think about the show! (Use the Hashtag) #TheChaleneShow so I know you’re a homie! XOXO Chalene

6 Jan 201734min

226 - Finish What You Started

226 - Finish What You Started

In this episode Chalene will address how to finish what you started. If you are the type of person that jumps from project to project and leaving things half finished, then you are din luck cause this episode is for you!!!   Stop dieting & start living: www.131Method.com   Get the 131 Book!!!   Here’s The System I Use Every Day to be More Organized & Crazy Productive: www.pushjournal.com   Sign Up For MY WEEKLY NEWSLETTER and you'll get FREE tips on how to live a ridiculously amazing fun-filled life!   Be sure you are subscribed to this podcast to automatically receive your episodes!!!  Spotify Itunes  Stitcher    Subscribe to Build Your Tribe!!! Spotify  Itunes Stitcher      Join our NEW, awesome PodSquad on Facebook here!   Get episode show notes here: www.chalenejohnson.com/podcast    Connect with me on your fav social platform: SnapChat: ChaleneOfficial    Facebook: www.Facebook.com/Chalene      Instagram: www.Instagram.com/ChaleneJohnson    Twitter: www.Twitter.com/ChaleneJohnson   Hey! Send me a tweet & tell me what you think about the show! (Use the Hashtag) #TheChaleneShow so I know you’re a homie! XOXO Chalene

21 Des 201624min

225 - Brock Johnson|What Your Kids Are Really Doing in Social Media

225 - Brock Johnson|What Your Kids Are Really Doing in Social Media

In this episode Chalene speaks one on one with her teenager son Brock Johnson. Brock speaks frankly about how kids use social media. This is a must listen episode for all parents of teenage kids.   Stop dieting & start living: www.131Method.com   Get the 131 Book!!!   Here’s The System I Use Every Day to be More Organized & Crazy Productive: www.pushjournal.com   Sign Up For MY WEEKLY NEWSLETTER and you'll get FREE tips on how to live a ridiculously amazing fun-filled life!   Be sure you are subscribed to this podcast to automatically receive your episodes!!!  Spotify Itunes  Stitcher    Subscribe to Build Your Tribe!!! Spotify  Itunes Stitcher      Join our NEW, awesome PodSquad on Facebook here!   Get episode show notes here: www.chalenejohnson.com/podcast    Connect with me on your fav social platform: SnapChat: ChaleneOfficial    Facebook: www.Facebook.com/Chalene      Instagram: www.Instagram.com/ChaleneJohnson    Twitter: www.Twitter.com/ChaleneJohnson   Hey! Send me a tweet & tell me what you think about the show! (Use the Hashtag) #TheChaleneShow so I know you’re a homie! XOXO Chalene

2 Des 201629min

224 - Your Body Type Affects Your Results

224 - Your Body Type Affects Your Results

This episode is devoted to logic. Chalene will help you understand a lot more about your body type. She will explain why two people can do the exact same thing with completely different results.     Stop dieting & start living: www.131Method.com   Get the 131 Book!!!   Here’s The System I Use Every Day to be More Organized & Crazy Productive: www.pushjournal.com   Sign Up For MY WEEKLY NEWSLETTER and you'll get FREE tips on how to live a ridiculously amazing fun-filled life!   Be sure you are subscribed to this podcast to automatically receive your episodes!!!  Spotify Itunes  Stitcher    Subscribe to Build Your Tribe!!! Spotify  Itunes Stitcher      Join our NEW, awesome PodSquad on Facebook here!   Get episode show notes here: www.chalenejohnson.com/podcast    Connect with me on your fav social platform: SnapChat: ChaleneOfficial    Facebook: www.Facebook.com/Chalene      Instagram: www.Instagram.com/ChaleneJohnson    Twitter: www.Twitter.com/ChaleneJohnson   Hey! Send me a tweet & tell me what you think about the show! (Use the Hashtag) #TheChaleneShow so I know you’re a homie! XOXO Chalene

9 Nov 201634min

223 - Travel​ ​Tips for Productive Stress Free Travel

223 - Travel​ ​Tips for Productive Stress Free Travel

Do you panic the night before you have to travel and scramble to get everything packed? Do you stay up way to late trying to get everything done? Well if so this podcast is for you!! Chalene shares with you her packing tips and even her packing lists.   Stop dieting & start living: www.131Method.com   Get the 131 Book!!!   Here’s The System I Use Every Day to be More Organized & Crazy Productive: www.pushjournal.com   Sign Up For MY WEEKLY NEWSLETTER and you'll get FREE tips on how to live a ridiculously amazing fun-filled life!   Be sure you are subscribed to this podcast to automatically receive your episodes!!!  Spotify Itunes  Stitcher    Subscribe to Build Your Tribe!!! Spotify  Itunes Stitcher      Join our NEW, awesome PodSquad on Facebook here!   Get episode show notes here: www.chalenejohnson.com/podcast    Connect with me on your fav social platform: SnapChat: ChaleneOfficial    Facebook: www.Facebook.com/Chalene      Instagram: www.Instagram.com/ChaleneJohnson    Twitter: www.Twitter.com/ChaleneJohnson   Hey! Send me a tweet & tell me what you think about the show! (Use the Hashtag) #TheChaleneShow so I know you’re a homie! XOXO Chalene

18 Okt 201643min

222 - Motivation, Discipline and Habits|How to Maintain These Things

222 - Motivation, Discipline and Habits|How to Maintain These Things

On today’s episode Chalene talks about the difference between Motivation and Discipline. Chalene breaks down the differences and helps you discover what it takes to develop both Motivation and Discipline.   Stop dieting & start living: www.131Method.com   Get the 131 Book!!!   Here’s The System I Use Every Day to be More Organized & Crazy Productive: www.pushjournal.com   Sign Up For MY WEEKLY NEWSLETTER and you'll get FREE tips on how to live a ridiculously amazing fun-filled life!   Be sure you are subscribed to this podcast to automatically receive your episodes!!!  Spotify Itunes  Stitcher    Subscribe to Build Your Tribe!!! Spotify  Itunes Stitcher      Join our NEW, awesome PodSquad on Facebook here!   Get episode show notes here: www.chalenejohnson.com/podcast    Connect with me on your fav social platform: SnapChat: ChaleneOfficial    Facebook: www.Facebook.com/Chalene      Instagram: www.Instagram.com/ChaleneJohnson    Twitter: www.Twitter.com/ChaleneJohnson   Hey! Send me a tweet & tell me what you think about the show! (Use the Hashtag) #TheChaleneShow so I know you’re a homie! XOXO Chalene

12 Okt 201628min

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