Josh Cohen - Loneliness and solitude

The expression “being in one’s own company” captures the idea that, internally, we are more than one.

About Josh Cohen

"I’m a psychoanalyst in private practice in London and Professor of Modern Literary Theory at Goldsmiths, University of London.

My research is at the borders of psychoanalysis, literature and cultural theory. I’ve written a number of books, including one on Sigmund Freud, on privacy, on our aversion to work and, most recently, on the relationship between literature and life."

Key Points

• The expression “being in one’s own company” captures the idea that, internally, we are more than one. • Solitude is possible when we have a rich relationship with our inner companion; loneliness is when that companion is somebody we’d rather not be with. • Rousseau describes an experience of total, perfect happiness that is only possible in solitude, because it is a closing of the gap between one’s self and one’s inner companion. "Liking one’s own company"

There are many different kinds of loneliness. It’s a state that allows for all kinds of variegation. The expression “being in one’s own company”, or “liking one’s own company”, captures what’s at stake in the whole idea of loneliness and being alone; it puts into ordinary language the sense that, internally, we are more than one.

We’re the person who moves through the world, but there is also someone in our minds, in ourselves, who moves alongside us, providing a kind of companionship as well as a running commentary on the state of our lives. That companion can be somebody that we find congenial; somebody that helps us to be curious about ourselves and interested in the world. When we feel lonely, that companion can be somebody that we’d rather not be with; somebody that seems to offer no solace or interest of any kind. That’s when the experience of the world starts to feel empty and sad.