The Hidden Weight of Internalized Shame

Shame is one of the most isolating and painful emotions we can experience—especially after betrayal. In this episode, I dive deep into how internalized shame takes root, how it quietly shapes our thoughts, and how it keeps us locked in cycles of pain and disconnection. Whether you were the one betrayed or the one who did the betraying, shame shows up in powerful, sneaky ways that can make us believe we are the problem instead of simply experiencing something painful.


I walk through how shame forms, what the "shame loop" looks like in real life, and how to recognize the moment it begins hijacking your nervous system. More importantly, I share the practical steps you can take to meet shame with awareness, compassion, and truth—so you can begin to dissolve its power and reconnect with yourself and others.


Key Takeaways:

  • Shame often disguises itself as truth, but it's a lie.
  • Recognizing the "shame loop" is the first step out of it.
  • Self-compassion, context, and connection dissolve shame's grip.
  • Healing begins when we stop proving shame right.


If you're ready to learn how to break free from internalized shame and build real self-trust, I invite you to apply for my program at https://andreagiles.com/get-your-life-back/.


Mentioned in this episode:


More from me:


Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes!


For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/


© 2020 - 2025 Andrea Giles

Episoder(237)

A Painful Lesson in Avoiding Facing the Truth | Ep #203

A Painful Lesson in Avoiding Facing the Truth | Ep #203

In this episode, I open up about how avoiding uncomfortable truths in relationships can create even deeper pain over time. I talk about the emotional toll of denial, the importance of addressing chall...

15 Aug 202522min

When to Let the Old Stories Go | Ep #202

When to Let the Old Stories Go | Ep #202

In this episode, I explore how storytelling can be a powerful tool for healing after betrayal. I explain the difference between revisiting a story to gain clarity and retelling it in a way that keeps ...

8 Aug 202522min

How to Bring Up the Infidelity Again Without Starting Another War | Ep #201

How to Bring Up the Infidelity Again Without Starting Another War | Ep #201

In this episode we're going to talk about the complexities of conversations about infidelity. I know that sometimes it's important to revisit painful topics, so let's discuss some effective communicat...

2 Aug 202525min

Keep Watering - What My Flowers Taught Me About Healing After Infidelity | Ep #200

Keep Watering - What My Flowers Taught Me About Healing After Infidelity | Ep #200

It's the 200th episode of Heal from Infidelity! I'm going to share a personal story about planting flowers - and the importance of continuing to care for yourself and your relationships, even when fa...

25 Jul 202522min

When They're Unhappy with You: Staying True without Shutting Down | Ep #199

When They're Unhappy with You: Staying True without Shutting Down | Ep #199

Let's talk about the challenges of navigating disapproval and emotional reactions in relationships. You'll learn about differentiation — maintaining one's identity while being in a relationship — and ...

18 Jul 202525min

When Forgiving Doesn't Mean Forgetting | Ep #198

When Forgiving Doesn't Mean Forgetting | Ep #198

Today we take a look at the complex relationship between forgiveness and forgetting, emphasizing that true forgiveness does not require the erasure of painful memories. I'll discuss the importance of ...

11 Jul 202534min

The Hidden Pain of Betrayal - Yours, Theirs, Ours | Ep #197

The Hidden Pain of Betrayal - Yours, Theirs, Ours | Ep #197

In this episode, we look at the hidden pain of betrayal, emphasizing that both the betrayed and the betrayer experience deep emotional turmoil. We explore the myths surrounding infidelity, the importa...

4 Jul 202522min

The Mask of Avoidance: When Protection Becomes Disconnection | Ep #196

The Mask of Avoidance: When Protection Becomes Disconnection | Ep #196

In this episode we discuss the pervasive issue of avoidance in relationships. We explore how avoidance manifests as a lack of communication and emotional engagement, leading to disconnection and mistr...

27 Jun 202526min

Populært innen Fakta

mikkels-paskenotter
fastlegen
dine-penger-pengeradet
relasjonspodden-med-dora-thorhallsdottir-kjersti-idem
foreldreradet
treningspodden
rss-strid-de-norske-borgerkrigene
jakt-og-fiskepodden
sinnsyn
rss-kunsten-a-leve
hverdagspsyken
rss-var-forste-kaffe
fryktlos
rss-kull
gravid-uke-for-uke
rss-bisarr-historie
lederskap-nhhs-podkast-om-ledelse
hagespiren-podcast
takk-og-lov-med-anine-kierulf
tomprat-med-gunnar-tjomlid