Being Jim Davis

We kick off today's episode with some wild and baseless speculation about how eighteenth century British philosopher David Hume would have regarded the difference between Count Duckula and non-Count Quackula. It's pretty much downhill from there. Today's strip

16 Jun 201718min

Today's Garfield is another Jim Davis riff on Spring and Springtime. I guess I should probably embed a performance of Stravinsky's Rite of Spring or something like that. But instead, here's more Fats Waller. God, I love Fats Waller. People treat him like a novelty act, but he's just so fucking good. So so so so fucking good.Today's strip

15 Jun 201726min

Jon didn't want to talk with me about The Three-Body Problem, that Chinese Science Fiction novel everyone's talking about. I guess because he's an uncultured boob. You know who did read The Three-Body Problem? President Barack Obama, that's who! Maybe I should see if he wants to team up on a Hagar the Horrible podcast or something...Anyway, here's a better recording of Fats Waller's "Your Feet's Too Big," set to a cartoon for some reason.Today's strip

14 Jun 201720min

Well, look, I'm not going to embed photos from my feet-only Instagram account all week. And I'm certainly not going to sit here and write out a summary of what happens in today's episode. I mean, who even remembers?So here's a video of Fats Waller performing his classic song "Your Feet's Too Big." It is, honestly, not his best ever recording of this number, but it's a pretty entertaining clip nonetheless.Today's strip

13 Jun 201716min

So recently a lot of people have written in to say that they would really like to subscribe to my Instagram account where I only post pictures of my feet, but what with work and family all the recent surprising and dramatic political developments, they just haven't been able to find the time. Well, listeners, fear not! Here's a sampler: A post shared by Christopher Winter (@i.am.the.worst) on May 15, 2017 at 8:21pm PDT A post shared by Christopher Winter (@i.am.the.worst) on May 18, 2017 at 1:40pm PDT A post shared by Christopher Winter (@i.am.the.worst) on May 31, 2017 at 7:54pm PDT Sun's out, toes out. A post shared by Christopher Winter (@i.am.the.worst) on Jun 9, 2017 at 5:12pm PDT Today's strip

12 Jun 201731min

Thank you for downloading Being Thomas Jefferson, the world's ONLY daily podcast dedicated to the Lazy Susan. On today's episode, we'll continue our analysis of the renaissance in LS style and design that occurred in the mid-1950s following technological innovations developed by engineer and soy-sauce magnate George Hall. Of particular interest in our discussion will be the ensuing impact on the San Fransisco-area Chinese restaurant industry.Then, we'll be airing part two of our exciting seven-part interview with Professor Mike Huggins from the University of Cumbria regarding the varied sociological implications of Lazy Susan integration with Scrabble and other board-based leisure activities both at home and abroad.Finally we'll wrap things up with yet another installment of our popular quiz segment "What Goes Around...?" where we each take turns trying to guess the specific model Lazy Susan the other is currently spinning based only on a series of yes or no questions.You won't want to miss this one; it's a real pivot point! Today's stripDoes the dog die?http://www.dictionary.com/browse/ptuiThe Jefferson Bible

11 Jun 201724min

Calmly we walk through this April’s day, Metropolitan poetry here and there, In the park sit pauper and rentier, The screaming children, the motor-car Fugitive about us, running away, Between the worker and the millionaire Number provides all distances, It is Nineteen Thirty-Seven now, Many great dears are taken away, What will become of you and me (This is the school in which we learn ...) Besides the photo and the memory? (... that time is the fire in which we burn.) (This is the school in which we learn ...) What is the self amid this blaze? What am I now that I was then Which I shall suffer and act again, The theodicy I wrote in my high school days Restored all life from infancy, The children shouting are bright as they run (This is the school in which they learn ...) Ravished entirely in their passing play! (... that time is the fire in which they burn.) Avid its rush, that reeling blaze! Where is my father and Eleanor? Not where are they now, dead seven years, But what they were then? No more? No more? From Nineteen-Fourteen to the present day, Bert Spira and Rhoda consume, consume Not where they are now (where are they now?) But what they were then, both beautiful; Each minute bursts in the burning room, The great globe reels in the solar fire, Spinning the trivial and unique away. (How all things flash! How all things flare!) What am I now that I was then? May memory restore again and again The smallest color of the smallest day: Garfield is the school in which we learn, Garfield is the fire in which we burn.Obligatory 80s music video Today's stripYup, we're still promoting this blog for some reason

10 Jun 20178min

Boy, you talk about a clever disguise; that isn't Jon Arbuckle after all. It's Connie Chung!Here's another Star Trek thing that exists for some reason. Today's stripDr. Sparkle's Day by Day blog

9 Jun 201717min