In Bed With Alexa: Have Better Sex

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) is joined by Beth Sparksfire — the Queen of Hacienda, New York’s legendary sex-positive community and party scene.Together, we dive deep into how to be a thoughtful, respectful, and unforgettable sex party guest. Whether you’re a first-timer or looking to level up, Beth shares the real dos and don'ts from her years curating erotic experiences.We cover:What to know before attending your first sex partyHow to navigate consent, conversation, and energyWhy curiosity is sexy, but entitlement isn'tWhat not to do when you're naked in publicThe importance of aftercare — even at play partiesCreating safer, queerer, more intentional spacesHow Hacienda became the gold standard for sex-positive events✨ As always, the unedited version of this episode — plus more about my personal dating life, spicy stories, and access to my Close Friends on IG — is on Patreon!

17 Jul 54min

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) is joined by Birna Gustafsson, sex educator with a master's in public health and host of Explicit Studies, to talk about the sea of sexual misinformation we’re constantly swimming in—and how to get better at spotting it.Together, they bust myths that still circulate widely online (even in sex-positive spaces) and explore how shame, purity culture, and bad science shape our sexual health beliefs.Expect to learn:The actual failure rate of pulling out and why it’s riskier than you thinkWhy douching is unnecessary—and can be harmfulWhether you can get pregnant on your period (hint: you can)The truth about HPV, oral sex, and throat cancerWhy orgasms aren’t the only marker of “good sex”The dangers of black-and-white sex advice on social mediaHow kids are absorbing harmful beliefs from TikTok, porn & uninformed adultsWhy pegging can turn men into better lovers 👀Why we must improve sex ed for healthcare professionalsHow to know if your sex advice source is trustworthyBirna also shares how she's helping train nurses and midwives to better support patients with inclusive, evidence-based sex education. Plus: her favorite sex ed resources, books, and where to go if you're ready to learn the truth.✨ Want more? Unedited episodes, Alexa's personal dating stories, and her IG Close Friends are all on Patreon: patreon.com/sexwithalexaThank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Use code ALEXA to try their platform for free for 24h and, if you love it, get 50% off their yearly pass. 14 day money back guarantee if you don't! Click here to sign up:https://beducate.me/alexa-july

10 Jul 56min

In this very juicy and educational episode, sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with Jamie Joy, a queer, trans certified sex educator and full-blown fisting aficionado. We dive deep (literally and figuratively) into the world of fisting, from how to prep and practice it safely to the surprising aftercare and emotional intensity it can carry.We also discuss:How to prep for fisting (from hygiene to headspace)Differences between vaginal and anal fistingSafety tips, including glove use, nails, and douchingWhy fisting is more emotional and intimate than you’d thinkWhat to do if you're curious about trying itDebunking myths about poop, pain, and gay panicThe role of breath, communication, and pleasure in anal playThe stigma around anal play—especially for straight menJamie's favorite techniques and their own mold of their fist (yes, really!)You can check out more of Jamie's work here!🌈 New to the pod? Subscribe, rate & leave us a review. And if you want unedited episodes + a peek into my personal dating and sex life, join us on Patreon. You’ll also get added to my IG Close Friends list 💌Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Use code ALEXA to try their platform for free for 24h and, if you love it, get 50% off their yearly pass. 14 day money back guarantee if you don't! Click here to sign up:https://beducate.me/alexa-june

26 Jun 1h 7min

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) is joined by Thea Rose, host of Seggs Talk Radio and founder of a new STI testing startup, to talk about what it really takes to build a sex-positive business—from scratch, with heart, and without losing your mind.Thea opens up about her messy, honest path as a multi-hyphenate creator, how she juggles podcasting, launching companies, and staying grounded through burnout, ADHD, OnlyFans, and entrepreneurship in a taboo space. If you've ever wondered what it actually takes to build something sustainable in the sexual wellness world—this one's for you.We get into:How to actually niche down without losing your voice or creativityWhy your “little business” deserves as much celebration as a wedding or babyHow to recover when your audience isn't aligned (and why starting fresh matters)The role of risk-taking in entrepreneurship (and how it shows up in the bedroom)Launching an OnlyFans Why being passionate about your work matters more than the moneySex-positive branding, burnout, and building your dream audienceThe cost of being underestimated as a woman in businessChoosing to celebrate yourself in your own wayCraving more intimacy—even in a city full of peopleWhy we have to break away from traditional life milestones💌 Want more? Join my Patreon for unedited episodes, behind-the-scenes stories from my dating and sex life, and access to my Close Friends list on Instagram.Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Use code ALEXA to try their platform for free for 24h and, if you love it, get 50% off their yearly pass. 14 day money back guarantee if you don't! Click here to sign up:https://beducate.me/alexa-june

12 Jun 55min

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) is joined by Allie Hoffman, founder of Catch The Feels—a viral in-person dating experience helping people ditch dating apps and reconnect with their bodies, emotions, and intuition.We dive deep into Allie’s groundbreaking “four systems of knowing” and how we can use the body, emotions, thoughts, and inner truth to date with more clarity and self-trust. Allie opens up about falling for poly men while being deeply monogamous, breaking her pattern of choosing emotionally unavailable partners, and how her body often speaks louder than her mind when it comes to sex and relationships.We also discuss:How to spot the difference between ego and intuitionWhy we keep falling for unavailable people (and how to stop)Her practice of using orgasmic energy for sex magicThe truth about dating apps and why they’re keeping us stuckHow to “own your erotic map” and be okay with your identity—whether you’re queer, kinky, monogamous or none of the aboveHow The Feels was born and what really happens at her IRL dating eventsWhy being open to love is the bravest thing you can doSex, breakups, and learning to hear your body say “no”How to break your patterns and stop ignoring red flags just because the sex is good💌 Want more? Join my Patreon for unedited episodes, behind-the-scenes stories from my dating and sex life, and access to my Close Friends list on Instagram.

5 Jun 48min

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) is joined once again by photographer, ethical slut, and emotionally available king Matthew Kayman for a raw and wildly entertaining deep dive into threesomes, pegging, vasectomies, and how men can do better in sex and relationships.We go deep about what it means to unlearn toxic masculinity and embrace a more present, consensual, and pleasure-focused approach to sex. Matt opens up about getting pegged for the first time, navigating group sex with intention, and why he chose to get a vasectomy—and how it’s impacted his confidence and partnerships.We also unpack:Why pegging changed how he shows up as a top and partnerTips for navigating MFM threesomes with care and curiosityHow to explore dominant and submissive roles without egoThe mental and physical realities of getting a vasectomy (and why you should get one!)How to communicate during casual sex without killing the vibeManaging a sex-positive roster (with check-ins!)The difference between protective and possessive behaviorFriendship with exes, emotional responsibility, and being a grown-ass slut🎁 BONUS SCENE: Stick around for a surprise scene with Mario Cruz, recorded onboard the spicy Desire Cruise, where we talk about spooning, swinging, and everything in between.💌 Want more? Join my Patreon for unedited episodes, behind-the-scenes stories from my dating and sex life, and access to my Close Friends list on Instagram.

29 Mai 1h 1min

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) sits down with NYC-based photographer, ethical slut, and reformed cheater Matthew Kayman for an honest, reflective, and hilarious conversation about evolving from messy dating patterns to intentional, kink-informed, and transparent relationships.We unpack his shift from monogamy to polyamory, navigating play parties, unlearning toxic masculinity, and figuring out how to explore power dynamics while remaining ethical and emotionally available.✨ In this episode, we talk about:How Matthew realized he wasn’t dating ethically—and what changed thatHis transition into ethical non-monogamy and what it taught him about himselfTips for flirting, FaceTime pre-dates, and dating apps that don’t suckPower dynamics in dating, and how kink helped him explore both dom & sub rolesGroup sex, queer curiosity, and learning how to communicate mid-orgySlutty shame, hot guy privilege, and navigating softness in hookup cultureWhy it’s not just about consent, but context and careLessons from play parties, switching, and setting expectations with new partnersThis is an episode about dating better—not perfectly, but with curiosity, compassion, and accountability.💌 Want more? On Patreon, you’ll get the unedited version of this episode, behind-the-scenes tea on my dating and sex life, and access to my Close Friends list on Instagram.Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Use code ALEXA to try their platform for free for 24h and, if you love it, get 60% off their yearly pass. 14 day money back guarantee if you don't! Click here to sign up:https://beducate.me/alexa-may

22 Mai 59min

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) is joined by sex educator, performer, and self-proclaimed “dildo slinger” Dirty Lola (@dirtylola) for a raw and hilarious conversation about shame, sex, and self-acceptance.From growing up in a naked household to navigating deep religious trauma, Lola shares the journey of becoming a fearless advocate for shameless pleasure and body confidence. We get into:Her early sex-positive explorations and yes—high school sex parties!The complex layers of body image, fatphobia, and family shameHow shame shows up in our sex lives and what to do about itWhy orgasms don’t equal worth, and how to stop performative sexWhat she’s learned about micropenises, penis shame, and making pleasure work for everyoneHow to start loving your body—even before it’s your “goal body”Tips on letting go of external validation and dressing for YOUAging, menopause, and staying slutty at every stage of lifeHow to be a better partner by showing up with kindness and complimentsThis episode is brought to you by Splash Blanket - the world’s most luxurious waterproof blanket.  Feel more free and liberated in the bedroom with code ALEXA😏 Want to hear more behind the scenes? On Patreon, you’ll find the unedited version of this episode, stories from my personal dating life, and access to my Close Friends list on Instagram

15 Mai 1h 5min