How to Understand Anxiety and See Threats Clearly
We’re living in an anxious time, and part of the reason we’re anxious is because there are very real challenges we face both individually and collectively. But we’re also affected by the natural tendencies of the brain, which is easily influenced by fear and threat. On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson focus on how we can see threats clearly and be the “right amount” of concerned. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:20: Why is it hard for us to see threats without excessive worry? 3:35: Transcending evolutionary influences toward fear 6:30: The last time Rick took LSD 10:45: Discerning what’s valuable in our anxieties, and leaving the rest 15:45: Forrest’s apartment fire story 17:35: Disagreements in evaluating a threat between people 21:55: Probability of risk 25:00: Practical techniques to assess threats with more clarity 29:30: Existential acceptance 33:30: Help for anxiety about anxiety 37:15: Recap New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price. Sponsors: Wondrium helps you learn anything! Right now, Wondrium is offering our listeners 50% OFF their first three months. Sign up today at wondrium.com/beingwell. Being Well is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
28 Nov 202243min
Moving Beyond “Fair” to Build a Great Relationship with Nate and Kaley Klemp
These days couples often shoot for 50/50 in their relationships: an even split of responsibilities in the home or at work. But 50/50 often leads to fights over fairness, and this fixation on fairness can be the death of many relationships. On this episode of Being Well, Forrest and Dr. Rick are joined by Nate and Kaley Klemp to explore how we can build fun, fulfilling, and truly equitable relationships. Topics include Nate and Kaley’s early relationship struggles, different models of relationship, breaking out of old patterns, and how we can manage situations where one partner really is contributing significantly more than the other. About our Guests: Kaley Klemp is an executive coach and expert on small-group dynamics, and Nate Klemp is a bestselling author and founding partner at Mindful, one of the world's largest mindfulness media and training companies. Together, they’re the co-authors of The 80/80 Marriage: A New Model for a Happier, Stronger Relationship. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:45: Nate and Kaley’s personal relationship as a basis for their work 5:30: Three different models of relationship 9:30: Two pillars to 80/80 - mindset and structure 12:20: How a 50/50 dynamic caused problems for Nate and Kaley 19:20: The conscious or unconscious division of roles 21:30: Gratitude and generosity 25:40: Parenting, shared success, and being on a team 32:15: Getting your partner’s buy-in, reveal and request 39:50: Underlying beliefs and power imbalances 44:20: Creating structure (and data) to have difficult conversations 49:30: Distinguishing a reluctant partner from an unwilling partner 52:05: Key skills that distinguish successful couples 56:10: Recap New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price. Sponsors: Wondrium helps you learn anything! Right now, Wondrium is offering our listeners 50% OFF their first three months. Sign up today at wondrium.com/beingwell. Being Well is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
21 Nov 20221h 5min
Choosing the Roles We Play in Life
If you’re the kind of person who listens to mental health podcasts, you’re more likely than average to get pulled into an impromptu “helping role” with your family and friends. Sometimes we seek out these roles, but they can also be uncomfortable or one-sided. And sometimes we get stuck playing a role for someone else that we never wanted in the first place. On this episode of Being Well, Forrest and Dr. Rick use this situation as a way in to exploring the various roles we play in life, and the profound impact those often unconscious roles have on us. They talk about relationship models, how we select our roles, how familiar roles can keep us trapped in old patterns, enactments and triangulation, and how we can exit unhealthy systems. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:50: The hazards of accidentally becoming a friend’s therapist 6:45: Objectivity, professionalism, and not needing to be liked 11:00: The roles we take on and how they shape us 16:45: Why we choose certain roles, and being crippled by our strengths 21:00: Enactments 25:15: Splitting 30:10: When someone else pushes you into a role 35:10: Triangulation 48:10: Deep listening and a lesson from Carl Rogers 51:10: Practical tips for drawing boundaries in your roles with others 59:40: Recap New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price. Sponsors: Wondrium helps you learn anything! Right now, Wondrium is offering our listeners 50% OFF their first three months. Sign up today at wondrium.com/beingwell. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
14 Nov 20221h 9min
Authentically Developing Self-Worth
It’s one thing to feel good about what we do, and another to feel truly worthy from the inside out. When we increase our self-worth it allows us to take our needs more seriously, get on our own side, and change our lives for the better. On this episode of Being Well, Rick and Forrest explore how we can develop a more durable sense of self-worth. They talk about self-worth vs. self-esteem, what causes people to lack self-worth, Rick’s personal story of developing a true sense of worthiness, and why more self-worth probably won’t turn you into a narcissistic a**hole. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:00: The value of self-worth 2:50: Will improving my self-worth turn me into a narcissist? 5:45: What makes people more likely to struggle with self-worth? 6:50: Distinguishing self-worth from self-esteem 9:30: Rick’s own journey to a better sense of self-worth 14:55: Inner attacker, inner nurturer, and the beleaguered self. 19:15: The process of building up your nurturing parts 27:20: Investigating negative stories we tell ourselves 30:55: Mutual rapport and being loving 33:40: Social aspects of developing self worth, and why therapy works 36:50: Non-social aspects 38:20: Relating to yourself from a less ego-oriented perspective 44:40: Vulnerability and tenderness in our interactions with others 46:05: Recap New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price. Sponsors: Wondrium helps you learn anything! Right now, Wondrium is offering our listeners 50% OFF their first three months. Sign up today at wondrium.com/beingwell. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
7 Nov 202252min
Saying No to Your Past, Embracing Growth, and Becoming Lighter with Yung Pueblo
Diego Perez, widely known by his pen name Yung Pueblo, joins Forrest to explore how we can deepen our personal practice, refine the mind, break old patterns, relax the self, and feel lighter than we were before. This was one of my absolute favorite conversations I’ve had on the podcast, and being with Diego was a real pleasure. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. About our Guest: Diego Perez is a poet, meditator, and New York Times bestselling author widely known through his pen name Yung Pueblo. His writing focuses on how we can grow and change for the better, create healthy relationships, and come to truly know ourselves. His newest book is Lighter: Let Go of the Past, Connect with the Present, and Expand the Future. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 0:55: Why the name Yung Pueblo? 2:35: What holds most people back from growth 4:35: Habits Diego struggled with and the logical basis of coping mechanisms 9:15: Moments of insight in learning Vipassana Meditation 11:40: Finding stability in the gradual separation from the ‘self’ 20:30: Stories others have told us about ourselves 26:50: What has helped Diego find a flexible sense of identity? 28:55: Relationships as a process not a person 31:20: Diego’s personal meditation and creative practice 34:15: The benefits of a pen name and healthy detachment from your work 40:00: Benefits and pitfalls of social media 42:50: Forrest’s meditation practice, and the positive aspects of difficult emotions 48:25: What Diego would tell his younger self. 50:30: Recap New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price. Sponsors: Wondrium helps you learn anything! Right now, Wondrium is offering our listeners 50% OFF their first three months. Sign up today at wondrium.com/beingwell. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
31 Okt 202255min
How to Forgive Yourself
We all make mistakes in life. When we do it's important to take appropriate responsibility, feel the "wince," and make amends as we can. But after we've done that...then what? Many people find it easier to forgive others than they do to truly forgive themselves, and it's not uncommon to be burdened by excessive shame and guilt that has outlived its expiration date. On this episode Dr. Rick and Forrest explore forgiveness, including how we can forgive ourselves. This includes common myths and misunderstandings about forgiveness, the difference between healthy and unhealthy forms of shame and remorse, coming to terms with what we've done, and a roadmap to achieving (self-)forgiveness. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:05: Assumptions, approval, and what forgiveness is and is not 7:45: What does healthy remorse look like? 10:00: Forrest exploring a dream about appropriate remorse 13:00: Our internalized justice system 17:00: More on dreams and internal parts 24:25: Aspects of unhealthy remorse 27:30: How to move through a recurring cycle of shame and unhealthy remorse 32:30: Proportionality, defensiveness, intention, and owning your mistakes 41:00: Clean pain and dirty pain 46:55: Some concrete practices 51:40: Recap Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! For just the cost of a cup of coffee a month you can support the show, and receive a variety of bonuses in return. Sponsors: Listen to Season 2 of Turning Points from Boston Globe Media wherever you get your podcasts! Access over 30 at-home lab tests from Everlywell, and head to everlywell.com/beingwell for twenty percent off your next test. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
24 Okt 20221h
Evolving Our Approach to Treating Trauma with Dr. Bessel van der Kolk
On today’s episode of Being Well, Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, the author of The Body Keeps the Score, joins Rick and Forrest to explore how trauma keeps us stuck, and how we can use imagination, self-expression, and creativity to break away from those old patterns. Along the way they talk about using somatic and non-cognitive interventions, internalized abuse, the value of a developmental perspective, using psychedelics for complex trauma, some of the problems with modern psychiatry, and how we can cultivate an equitable, flexible, and compassionate approach to treatment. About Our Guest: Bessel van der Kolk is a professor of Psychiatry at the Boston University School of Medicine and president of the Trauma Research Foundation in Brookline, Massachusetts. He’s also the bestselling author of The Body Keeps the Score, which is one of the most influential modern books in the field. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:15: Imagination and aspirational thinking in healing trauma 4:55: Creativity and cultural context 6:10: Where a sense of agency begins 8:40: Why people internalize abuse 16:30: The many practices for redefining past traumas 22:10: The state of psychedelic research and the importance of patient care 29:15: The need for new approaches to diagnosis and treatment 34:00: Issues with the DSM-5 and the need to integrate interpersonal processes 38:50: What counts as trauma? Collective trauma? 42:25: The need for cooperative strategies confronting trauma in pro-social movements 45:15: What helps people resource themselves to create change? 51:45: Recap New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
17 Okt 20221h 2min
Changing Old Patterns, Using Psychedelics Thoughtfully, and Exploring Human Nature: October Mailbag
On this episode of Being Well, Rick and Forrest answer questions from listeners. They explore what they’re still working on in their relationship, how we can disengage from obsessive thoughts and old patterns, Rick’s thoughts on psychedelics and how they can be used with discernment, their views on whether human nature is innately cooperative or competitive, and much more. If you’d like to ask a question to be answered on the show, send us an email at contact@beingwellpodcast.com or support us on Patreon. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:10: What do Rick and Forrest still find challenging in their relationship? 8:40: What to do with obsessive thoughts 17:00: What to do when old patterns creep up 26:35: Rick’s thoughts on taking psychedelics with intention outside of therapy 35:05: Respect for indigenous tradition around psychedelic plant use 37:00: Interpretation, discernment, and drugs as telescopes 42:45: Compassionate justice vs. holding and controlling 47:50: How do we get the ideas we have about the world? 53:25: Recap Sponsors: Green Chef makes eating well easy with plans to fit every lifestyle. Order organic, environmentally conscious meal kits at GreenChef.com/beingwell135 and use code beingwell135 to get $135 off across five boxes - and your first box ships free! Access over 30 at-home lab tests from Everlywell, and head to everlywell.com/beingwell for twenty percent off your next test. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. MDbio is a plant-based medicine company with natural products that address sleep, anxiety, pain, and immunity. Get your FREE 10-count sample pack by going to mdbiowellness.com and entering the promo code BEINGWELL at checkout! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
10 Okt 20221h 1min
