Leaving Psychological Abuse & Reclaiming the Self: Healing, Identity, and the Paramore Paradox

In this deeply moving episode, therapist and host Malisa Hepner sits down with Kristen Crabtree, author, divorce coach, and self-described archeologist of the self, to explore the courageous journey of leaving a controlling and psychologically abusive marriage. Kristen shares how trauma-informed therapy illuminated the reality of her experience and empowered her to choose herself—despite fear, grief, and uncertainty.

Together, they unpack the role of meditation, self-reflection, and community in healing from relational trauma, and introduce Kristen's transformative framework, the Paramore Paradox, a pathway to rediscovering identity after emotional erosion. The conversation also centers the unique challenges faced within psychologically abusive relationships—particularly in the LGBTQ+ community—and offers hope, clarity, and compassion for those quietly questioning their reality.

This episode is an invitation to listen inward, trust your knowing, and remember that reclaiming yourself is not selfish—it is sacred. Begin the excavation.Set aside ten quiet minutes this week and reflect on one question: "Where have I been managing myself to stay safe instead of being myself to feel alive?" Notice what arises—without judgment. Write it down. Sit with it. Let it be information, not a verdict. Healing from psychological abuse often begins not with dramatic exits, but with gentle truths finally being named.

Kristen's links: Website, Insta

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