56: How to Know If You're a Great Leader

In this episode, we're diving into a topic many leaders struggle with … truly knowing if you're doing a good job. We all have blind spots, and what we think a great leader is — someone who has all the answers and never makes mistakes. These are common myths we tell ourselves. The truth is, poor leadership usually happens outside of our awareness.

You'll hear how self-awareness is essential for great leadership. That means having the courage to genuinely ask for feedback from your team, family, and community. We also discuss the fear of looking stupid or incompetent, and how that shame can lead us to react defensively.

Finally, I discuss how the skills taught in the Dare to Lead framework — like getting comfortable with being uncomfortable, managing shame, and using conflict to build trust — can be game-changers for your leadership .

The good news is that as a leader, no one expects you to be perfect; you only have to be willing to work on any problem spots. Knowing is always better than not knowing, because you can't change what you don't acknowledge.

Join me to learn the skills you need to show up as the brave, authentic leader your team and family need.

Key Takeaways

• Poor leadership often stems from a lack of awareness of how you're impacting others and the organization. To be a great leader, you need to proactively cultivate self-awareness.

• Great leaders are willing not only to receive feedback but to ask for it directly from others, and truly listen to the response.

• Everyone has problem spots, blind spots, and weak areas. Acknowledging and working on them earns respect and improves your effectiveness.

• You can only change what you acknowledge. Ignoring problems won't make them go away — it keeps things stuck and can make it worse.

• Learning to manage feelings of shame (e.g., the fear of being perceived as incompetent), you can move from an emotional, reactive state to a calm, intentional response.

• Why conflict and adversity should be viewed as opportunities to build relationships and bond with your team, acting as a "fast forward" on building trust and confidence.

Great leaders face setbacks head-on and bravely lead their teams through change without excessive drama, anxiety, or stress, and I hope this episode helps you get curious about how you can be a stronger leader.

Timestamps:

00:00 Introduction to Leadership

01:15 Identifying Good Leadership

02:39 Self-Awareness in Leadership

04:25 The Fear of Feedback

07:57 Research on Effective Leadership

10:26 The Importance of Self-Assessment

11:55 The Dare to Lead Workshop

14:11 Embracing Feedback and Building Trust

20:11 Handling Setbacks and Moving Forward

21:04 Conclusion and Workshop Invitation

Links from today's episode:

• Dare to Lead Workshop

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