196: Closure, No Contact, And How To Get Over Someone

Closure is a lie, and waiting for it is keeping you stuck. In this episode of the Hard Truth Series, we get into why closure doesn't come from another person, what your brain is actually doing after a breakup, and why the conversation you keep replaying in your head would never be enough even if you got it. We cover the neuroscience of heartbreak, why searching for "why" makes things worse, and how identity loss after a relationship ends is what's really driving your distress. If you can't stop thinking about your ex, feel like you need one more explanation to move on, or keep putting your life on hold waiting for them to come back, this one is for you. We break down the difference between processing and rumination, why no contact feels impossible, and how to actually grieve a breakup so you can stop outsourcing your healing to someone who already walked away. Pre-order Sabrina's book coming out October 2026, "Why Am I Like This?" If you’re ready to slow down, trust your instincts, and break your old dating patterns, the Healthy Relationship Foundations Course walks you through it step-by-step HERE! If you’re serious about changing your dating patterns instead of repeating them, the Art of Going Slow course helps you unlearn urgency, regulate your nervous system, and build real connection without rushing, chasing, or abandoning yourself HERE! Get Ad free HERE!Want to work with Sabrina? HERE!Get merch for The Sabrina Zohar Show HERE!Don't forget to follow Sabrina and The Sabrina Zohar Show on Instagram and Sabrina on TikTok! Video now available on YOUTUBE! Please support our sponsors! Start your new morning ritual & get up to 43% off your @MUDWTR with code SABRINAZOHAR at mudwtr.com/SABRINAZOHAR! #mudwtrpod Unlock your best skin with @iRestorelaser and unlock exclusive savings on the iRestore Illumina Face Mask, use code SABRINA at irestore.com/SABRINA! #irestorepod ============================= Chapters: 00:00 Closure Doesn't Come From Them 03:15 Why Your Brain Craves an Explanation 06:30 Audience Questions: Stuck After a Breakup 09:45 The Neuroscience of Heartbreak 13:00 How to Actually Stop Thinking About Your Ex 16:15 Why Journaling Can Make It Worse 19:30 Identity Loss After a Breakup 22:45 What Grief Actually Looks Like 26:00 Reframing Closure as Grief 29:15 Tool of the Week: The Grief Inventory Disclaimer: The Sabrina Zohar Show, formerly known as Do The Work, is not affiliated with A.Z & associates LLC in any capacity. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices