Bridging the Desire Gap: Building Relational Self-Trust with Dr. Laura Jurgens

Does your confidence in the boardroom disappear in the bedroom?

Read the full episode breakdown + show notes: https://www.theselftrustcoach.com/blog/why-high-achievers-struggle-with-intimacy-self-trust

In this episode of The Self-Trust Solution, Dawn sits down with Dr. Laura Jurgens—a dual-certified master relationship coach and host of the Desire Gap podcast—to explore the fascinating "throughline" between how we trust ourselves in business and how we show up in our most intimate relationships.

Dr. Laura shares her vulnerable transition from the structured world of academia (where trust is built on external achievements) to the "wild west" of entrepreneurship and intimacy coaching. If you’ve ever felt like a "legitimate" expert in your field but an "amateur" in your personal life, this conversation is for you.

In this episode, we dive into:

• The "System-Trust" Trap: Why being a high achiever doesn't always translate to internal confidence.
• Building Evidence: How Dr. Laura used hundreds of hours of practice to "borrow" her own future confidence.
• The Desire Gap: Why discrepancies in intimacy are rarely about "sex" and almost always about a self-relationship gap.
• Overcoming Thought Errors: How to handle the fear of not being "legitimate" enough to help others.
• The First Step to Healing: Why self-compassion is the only way to close the gap and end the cycle of shame.

Connect with Dr. Laura Jurgens:@laura.jurgens.coachListen to the Desire Gap Podcast https://laurajurgens.com/podcast/

Visit Dr. Laura's Website https://laruajurgens.com

Get her  5 Steps to start solving Desire Differences without Blame or Shame http://www.laurajurgens.com/libido

Other Resources mentioned in this episode:

The Inner Room Practice

The Self-Trust Coach Website

Chapter Timestamps

00:00 Welcome and Guest Intro

01:33 System-Trust vs. Self-Trust: The Early Gaps

05:47 How to Build Evidence Through Radical Practice

07:47 Leaving the PhD Life: The Identity Shift

10:10 The Transition Plan: Making the Leap

14:10 Understanding the "Desire Gap" in Relationships

17:38 Dealing with Imposter Syndrome and Thought Errors

22:24 "Borrowing" Confidence: How Coaches Hold Space

25:27 Why Business Trust is Different from Intimacy Trust

31:16 The #1 Step to Stop the Shame Cycle

33:45 Advice to the Version of You That Is Still Afraid

36:20 Wrap Up and Next Steps

✨ Explore your own self-trust journey:

Start with the Self-Trust Identity Map👉 https://www.theselftrustcoach.com/identity-map

📩 Have a self-trust story to share?👉 https://www.theselftrustcoach.com/yourstory

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