What Healing Anxious Attachment Actually Looks Like ft. Christina Melgar Thomssen

Today's episode is one of the most personal conversations I've had on the show—because my guest, Christina Melgar Thomssen, has been on both sides of the work. She first came to me as a client in late 2021, in one of the darkest seasons of her life: newly single, living alone for the first time, a mattress on the floor, and barely taking care of herself. She felt too ashamed to admit to anyone how desperate she felt for connection. Watching one of my TikTok videos was the first time she'd felt truly seen.

What followed was a true transformation. Not a dramatic overnight shift, but the slow, consistent, unglamorous work of building habits, trusting herself, and learning what a healthy relationship actually felt like from the inside out. Christina went on to join my team, helping enroll and support my other coaching clients. And now? She's married to her husband Joey, living proof that the other side of anxious attachment is very, very real.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Where Christina was emotionally and physically when she first reached out—and what led her to enroll in the coaching program
• What she got out of the coaching program, including the self-care foundations that changed everything
• What holds most people back from seeking help (hint: it's rarely money or time—it's fear)
• What it actually felt like to date while healing, including the moments she caught herself slipping into old patterns and chose differently
• How she met Joey, what was unmistakably different about that relationship from the start, and how they made the decision to move in together just months into dating
• Why two anxious attachers can have a deeply secure relationship—and what that looks like day to day
• Whether Christina considers herself secure now, and her honest answer about where anxious attachment still shows up in her life
• What she would say to the version of herself sitting on that mattress on the floor

Healing resources for anyone struggling with anxious attachment:

• Read dozens of free blogs on how to heal the anxious attachment style on my website, crackliffe.com
• Grab a copy of my new book, Needy No More: The Journey From Anxious to Secure Attachment, at crackliffe.com/needy
• Explore my downloadable healing toolkit for anxious attachers at crackliffe.com/starterkit
• Learn more about the Needy No More coaching program and set up a free consultation at crackliffe.com/coaching
• Follow @crackliffe on Instagram and TikTok for tons more content on all things healing anxious attachment

Keywords: anxious attachment healing, anxious attachment success story, anxious attachment recovery, healing anxious attachment, secure attachment, attachment style transformation, anxious attachment coach, anxious attachment in relationships, anxious attachment and dating, how to heal anxious attachment, anxious to secure, secure relationship, healthy relationship