Ep11. AuDHD, Chronic Health and Medical Gaslighting with Nina

Content Warning:

This episode discusses chronic illness, medical gaslighting, healthcare discrimination, trauma within healthcare systems, and brief references to medical neglect and historical misogyny in medicine. Listener discretion is advised.

Summary:

In this episode of AuDHD IRL, Bri sits down with provisional psychologist Nina Buchborn, who shares her lived experience of AuDHD alongside chronic, invisible illnesses. Nina’s thesis explored medical gaslighting in the healthcare experiences of neurodivergent women with chronic pain, and this conversation dives into the deeply personal and systemic issues behind that research.

Together, Bri and Nina unpack the complex intersection between autism, ADHD, connective tissue disorders, dysautonomia, MCAS, chronic pain, fatigue, and more, and why so many people who are autistic and/or ADHD experience multiple health conditions at once. They discuss how these conditions are frequently misunderstood or dismissed in healthcare settings, particularly for women and gender-diverse people.

Nina shares stories from her own life and research participants about the impact of medical gaslighting, the emotional toll of being repeatedly dismissed by doctors, and the hidden reality of living with invisible illness. The conversation also explores the concept of masking on steroids, where Autistic people and ADHDers' masking overlaps with the pressure to appear well despite chronic illness.

Alongside the challenges, this episode also offers practical insights into self-advocacy in healthcare, navigating complex medical systems, and learning to trust your own body and experiences.

Takeaways:

1. Autism/ADHD and chronic illness often overlap.Emerging research suggests a strong connection between autism/ADHD and conditions such as connective tissue disorders, dysautonomia (including POTS), MCAS, and chronic pain. These links are increasingly recognised but still poorly understood in mainstream medicine.

2. Medical gaslighting is a systemic issue.Many people, particularly women and autistic/ADHD individuals, report their symptoms being dismissed as anxiety, stress, or exaggeration. This can delay diagnosis for years or decades.

3. Invisible illness creates layers of masking.People with chronic conditions often feel pressure to appear “well” in social and medical settings. For autistic/ADHD individuals, this can mean masking both their neurodivergence and their physical illness at the same time.

4. Chronic illness often involves grief.Losing access to activities, work, social life, and identity can bring significant grief. Validating this emotional experience is an important part of both psychological care and personal healing.

5. Self-advocacy in healthcare matters.Navigating the healthcare system can be exhausting, but asking questions, seeking second opinions, bringing support people to appointments, and requesting documentation can help patients advocate for themselves.

6. Trust your body.If something feels wrong, it deserves attention. Nina encourages listeners to trust their own bodily experiences and keep searching for answers and support.

7. Kindness toward yourself is essential.Living with chronic illness means adjusting expectations and recognising limits. Self-compassion is a crucial part of navigating health challenges.