Ep17. AuDHD & Multi-Exceptionality with Caitlin

Content Warning:

• Discussion of burnout and overwhelm
• Experiences of feeling misunderstood or “not fitting”
• Academic and school-related stress
• Perfectionism and pressure around potential
• Mental health challenges (including anxiety and low self-worth)

If these are prickly for you today, go have a cuppa instead!

Summary:

In this episode, Bri sits down with Caitlin to explore multi-exceptionality — the experience of being both gifted and multiply disabled (aka AuDHD).

Together, they unpack the complexity of having strengths and challenges that can mask each other. High intelligence, strong verbal skills, or creativity can often hide support needs, while struggles with executive functioning, emotional regulation, or sensory experiences can be misunderstood as a lack of effort or inconsistency.

The conversation explores how many twice-exceptional individuals grow up feeling “out of sync” — excelling in some areas while quietly struggling in others — and how this can impact identity, self-worth, and access to support.

Bri and Caitlin also challenge the idea that capability equals coping, highlighting the invisible effort it can take to keep up, mask difficulties, and meet expectations.

At its core, this episode is about recognising and validating the full picture — and creating space for both strengths and support needs to exist at the same time.

Takeaways:

• You can be gifted and still need support. Strengths don’t cancel out challenges — both can exist at the same time.
• Capability ≠ coping. Just because someone is achieving or performing well doesn’t mean it feels easy or sustainable.
• Twice exceptionality can be invisible. Strengths can mask difficulties, and difficulties can mask strengths — leading to missed or delayed understanding.
• “Inconsistency” often has an explanation. Fluctuating performance is not a character flaw — it reflects underlying differences in processing, energy, and support needs.
• The pressure of “potential” can be heavy. Being seen as capable or “bright” can create unrealistic expectations and internalised pressure.
• Many multi-exceptional individuals feel out of sync. Being ahead in some areas and behind in others can lead to confusion, frustration, and disconnection from peers.
• Masking can come at a cost. Trying to maintain a capable or “put together” image can contribute to burnout and identity confusion.
• Support should be based on need, not visibility. You don’t have to struggle more obviously to deserve help.
• Understanding changes everything. Having language for your experience can shift self-blame into self-compassion.
• You are allowed to be both. Both capable and struggling. Both strong and needing support.

You can find Caitlin on Instagram at @cathartic.collaborations, at her website www.catharticcollaborations.com.au, and listen to her podcast Divergent Dialogues.