The Scarlet Edit: Infidelity, Divorce, Starting Over.26 Juni

How to Put Yourself Out There in Your 40s (The Summer of George #2)

This week I'm getting into midlife dating in a new city, why putting yourself out there matters more than the outcome, and what I'm learning about building a life when the snowbirds leave town.

Week two of the Summer of George dropped me in Los Angeles, and the energy here is already different. I'm staying with a friend, walking to a new gym, taking my first workout class in years, and waking up to LA birds instead of Scottsdale ones. I lived in this city for four and a half years right out of college. Coming back at this stage of my life — comfortable in who I am, clear about what I'm doing — has reminded me how much the right city can match your frequency.

I also made a move this week I want to talk about. I reached out to a guy I'd met on Instagram a few months ago, someone who lives in LA. We'd traded voice notes for a couple of weeks before life pulled us in different directions. Since I'm in town, I figured I'd ask if he wanted to grab coffee. He wrote back kindly and told me he's seeing someone. Totally fine. The win wasn't the meetup. The win was the action.

For someone who is more of a traditional dater — I like the man to plan, to lead, to hold the door — pressing send on that message was the entire point. An object in motion stays in motion. I paid for one month of Hinge, canceled the auto-renew, and I'm staying open to whatever shows up in person while I'm in LA for the next few weeks.

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