44. What kind of leader do I want to be to myself?

In this episode, I talk about how one of the main things coming up for me as I'm on summer break is: what kind of leader do I want to be to myself? I have wide open space right now, a lot more time on my hands than I'm used to. Do I want to constantly make to-do lists, manage, evaluate, and try to earn my own approval… or can I be intentional about connecting with myself and making enjoyment the main objective?

I talk about how how I've noticed the ways that I numb out, procrastinate, or feel disconnected from my creativity, and how those behaviors actually make a lot of sense when I realize I'm still kind of relating to myself from a place of evaluation and pressure.

I have so much more fun when I'm enjoying the way I do things. But I can't force myself to enjoy things. If I'm not naturally enjoying, there's usually some resistance or pressure that needs to release first. Some emotional experience to feel into and honor. Then, the levity naturally returns.

When you try to manage yourself and your experience, it breeds more tension. When you connect with and attune to yourself, who you are at your core feels supported and it's easier to just BE. To just be instead of feel yourself trying to perform or contort or become something else. Anyway, thank you for listening

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