274. "We have a newborn and 89% of our income is already spent...Now what?"

Ramit Sethi of I Will Teach You To Be Rich speaks with Shelby and Calvin, 31 and 43, who have a new baby and feel trapped by their financial situation. Together they earn about $102,000 a year, but they have just $3,500 in savings, more than $20,000 in debt, and $0 currently going toward savings or investments. Shelby wants more structure and transparency, while Calvin admits that talking about money makes him uncomfortable. Their relationship has also been strained by financial secrecy, including a personal loan Shelby believed had already been paid off. Once their baby expenses are fully accounted for, their fixed costs rise to 89%. Ramit pushes them to stop relying on vague plans and small cuts and instead make bigger changes to how they manage money together. By the end of the conversation, they have a plan to reduce expenses, aggressively pay down debt, save automatically, and become more active financial partners. In this episode, we uncover: Why Calvin kept a personal loan secret Why Shelby does not fully trust him How they earn about $102,000 but still struggle Why their fixed costs reach 89% Why $0 currently goes toward savings Why Calvin says he has been in debt his whole life How he quietly sabotaged their money meetings How their childhoods shaped opposite money habits Why Shelby takes on more financial responsibility Why cutting small expenses isn’t enough How Calvin confronts the impact of his financial decisions How they could pay off their debt in around 11 months How they begin saving automatically Whether they can follow through on the plan Chapters (00:00:00) Introduction (00:03:01) Shelby discovers Calvin’s hidden debt (00:04:55) Why Calvin kept the loan secret (00:05:52) One layoff away from needing help (00:08:28) Calvin wants Shelby to manage the money (00:12:48) Shelby admits she does not fully trust Calvin (00:21:14) Ramit reviews their financial numbers (00:23:59) Calvin has been in debt his whole life (00:24:42) They earn more than $102,000 a year (00:27:36) Their fixed costs reveal the real problem (00:35:39) Calvin admits sabotaging their money meetings (00:38:08) Their fixed costs reach 89% (00:44:58) How Calvin grew up around money (00:50:10) Shelby’s childhood experience with scarcity (00:59:05) Rebuilding financial trust (01:03:03) Ramit rebuilds their Conscious Spending Plan (01:09:17) Creating a bigger financial vision (01:21:07) Redirecting spending toward debt (01:27:38) Calvin confronts his financial decisions (01:54:14) Shelby and Calvin’s follow-up This episode is brought to you by: ElevenLabs | If you run a business or handle customer operations across support, sales, or marketing, start with a demo at https://elevenlabs.io/ramit Skylight | Get $30 off a 15-inch Calendar at https://myskylight.com/ramit ZocDoc | Go to https://zocdoc.com/ramit to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today #sponsored Gelt | Gelt is taking on new clients now. Find out if you qualify at https://joingelt.com/ramit Leesa | Go to https://leesa.com for 25% off mattresses PLUS get an extra $50 off with promo code RAMIT, exclusive for my listeners Start a business in one hour | Join Ramit live on August 19 at 8pm ET for “Start A Business in One Hour.” Reserve your spot at https://iwt.com/business Rich Life Session | Join Spencer Greenberg and Jeremy Stevenson live on August 20 at 4pm ET to learn which self-help techniques actually drive lasting change. Sign up at https://iwt.com/events Connect with Ramit • Get my new book, Money For Couples • Join my Rich Life: Road to $100K program • Download the Conscious Spending Plan • Listen to my book—now on Audible • Get my New York Times best-selling book • Get my no-numbers journal • Other episodes • Instagram • Twitter • YouTube Apply to be coached for free on this podcast at https://iwt.com/apply