Learning You Don't Have to Earn Love with Alana Springsteen

What if the songs you've been writing were actually thetherapy you desperately needed?

What if the version of you that felt like the black sheep your whole life was the one who would help the rest of us feel less alone?

Alana Springsteen has been performing since before she knewwhat performing cost her. She signed her first publishing deal at 14, earned a gold record before she turned 25, CMT's Next Women of Country, and has shared stages with Keith Urban and Tyler Hubbard — all while quietly carrying a version of herself she hadn't yet figured out how to put down. Her sophomorealbum, I Hope This Helps, is the result of what happened when she stopped grinding and started digging.

Miles and Alana go deep into the fear woven into her faith,the people-pleasing that had her questioning “why,” the EMDR session that surfaced a memory from four years old, and the eating disorder she kept hidden until she was finally ready to let her mom in. This is a conversation about what it costs to become who you were always meant to be and the honesty aboutthe journey to get there.

In this conversation, you'll learn:

• How to Tell the Difference Between Faith and Fear
• How Performing for Love Slowly Erodes Your Identity
• How to Use Curiosity as a Tool for Deconstruction
• How People-Pleasing Becomes a Mask You Can't Take Off
• How to Pick Up the Mirror Instead of the Microscope
• How EMDR Unlocks Childhood Memories Still Running Your Adult Life
• How to Recognize When Validation Has Become a Drug
• How to Write Your Way Through Seasons That Would Otherwise Break You
• How to Let Your Parents See Who You Actually Are
• How to Stop Waiting for Permission to Love Yourself

The conversations we have on Human School are shaped by the work happening every day at Onsite. For more than 45 years, Onsite has helped people slow down, get honest about their stories, and experience meaningful change through world-class therapeutic experiences. Learn more at experienceonsite.com.

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What We Discuss:

00:00:00 – Meet Alana Springsteen

00:04:39 – The Two Years That Reshaped Everything

00:08:02 – Growing Up in Small Town Virginia

00:12:16 – The Gift and the Burden of a Religious Upbringing

00:18:57 – Moving to Nashville at 14

00:20:11 – Learning to See Your Parents as Human

00:21:17 – Advice for those Questioning Faith

00:23:27 – The Story Behind "Same God"

00:29:57 – Learning to Trust Your Own Inner Voice

00:31:48 – Wearing So Many Masks You Forget Your Own Face

00:36:52 – Being Public Before You Know Yourself

00:41:02 – Rick Rubin’s Influence on Creating Art

00:45:42 – Learning to Love Yourself Without Conditions

00:48:56 – EMDR Therapy and What It Surfaced

00:51:49 – Picking Up the Mirror Instead of the Microscope

00:56:52 – The Story Behind "Note to Self"

01:00:13 – “It's Never Too Late to Have a Happy Childhood.”

01:00:58 – Affirmations from Alana