The Narcissism Conversation: What’s Real, What’s Overused, and How to Heal With DeVona Alleyne

In this episode of Dating in Your 20s, Amelia and Lilly sit down with Rev. DeVona Alleyne, LCPC, Clinical Director at Millennium Counseling Center, for a candid conversation about the complexities of narcissism in relationships.

Together, they break down:

• The traits of narcissistic tendencies and how they can show up in dating
• The phenomenon of love bombing and its emotional aftermath
• The role of gaslighting and why it can be so disorienting
• How to recognize red flags and set boundaries
• The importance of self-awareness and compassion—for both yourself and others

DeVona shares wisdom from her clinical perspective and pastoral lens, offering guidance on how to protect your mental and emotional health while navigating the highs and lows of dating in your 20s.

This episode is an honest and empowering look at how to prioritize your needs, trust your instincts, and approach relationships with clarity and confidence.

Takeaways

Narcissistic tendencies can manifest as a lack of empathy.
Love bombing often covers up underlying shame.
Recognizing red flags early can prevent emotional turmoil.
Gaslighting is a common tactic used by narcissists.
Setting boundaries is crucial in any relationship.
Compassion for those with narcissistic tendencies is important.
Attachment styles can influence relationship dynamics.
Dating in your 20s requires self-awareness and reflection.
It's essential to prioritize your own needs in relationships.
Healthy relationships should allow for personal boundaries.

Related Episodes:

• The DMs Are Open: Listener Q&A
• Why You Ghost, Cling, or Chase: Attachment Styles with Hilary Rosenberg

Dating In Your 20s Anonymous Corner

We'd love to hear from you! Check out the anonymous DIY20s Form. It's a safe, judgment-free space to share what’s going on in your love life.

Connect:

Lilly Wehman: Millennium | LinkedIn
Amelia Abernathy: Millennium | LinkedIn
Rev. DeVona Alleyne: Millennium | LinkedIn

This podcast is powered by Millennium Counseling Center in Chicago, IL. To learn more visit: millenniumhope.com