Dr. Sue Johnson on Navigating Romantic Relationships
The One You Feed27 Aug 2019

Dr. Sue Johnson on Navigating Romantic Relationships

Dr. Sue Johnson is an author, clinical psychologist, researcher, and an internationally recognized leader in the field of couple interventions. She is founding Director of the International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT) and Distinguished Research Professor at Alliant University in San Diego, California, as well as Professor Emeritus, Clinical Psychology, at the University of Ottawa, Canada. In this interview, Dr. Sue Johnson discuss her best selling book, “Hold Me Tight: 7 Conversations for a Lifetime of Love” and her groundbreaking research of helping couples to enhance, repair, and keep their relationship. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Dr. Sue Johnson and I Discuss… Her book, Hold Me Tight: 7 Conversations for a Lifetime of Love The wolf parable and how therapists act as the third wolf for couples. Relationships are often stuck in fear and anger Emotional disconnection causes distress in relationships. Humans are wired for close connection with others. Attachment needs continue into adulthood, most notably in romantic relationships. Common conversations in distressed relationships are known as “demon dialogues”. Relationships stuck in predictable patterns is referred to as the “Protest Polka”. “Freeze and Flee” means one person gives up on the relationship. “Find the Bad Guy” in other words, "It’s not me, it’s you” Understanding the circle of criticism, or the “dance” you’re stuck in. Learning to blame this “dance” rather than each other. The “hold me tight conversation” that creates safety in the relationship. Understanding the negative cycle that causes disconnection. Creating a positive cycle by creating a secure bond “ARE” – Accessibility, Responsiveness, and Engagement. Talking about fears rather than acting on them leads to bonding. Emotional connection in a relationship is a source of joy and strength. Dr. Sue Johnson Links: drsuejohnson.com Twitter Facebook TalkSpace – the online therapy company that lets you message a licensed therapist from anywhere at any time. Therapy on demand. Non-judgemental, practical help when you need it at a fraction of the cost of traditional therapy. Visit www.talkspace.com and enter Promo Code: WOLF to get 65% off your first month. DoorDash – Don’t worry about dinner, let dinner come to you with DoorDash. Get $5 off your first order of $15 or more when you download the DoorDash app and enter promo code WOLF Westin – their reason for being is to help you travel well – eat well, move well and sleep well. Welcome to wellness. Explore at Westin.com See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Mini Episode: Decision Fatigue and the Power of Routines

Mini Episode: Decision Fatigue and the Power of Routines

Routines don't drain us, they strengthen us when used correctly. Deciding what to do all the time wears us out and saps out strength.  Some of our most popular interviews that you might also enjoy:Kino MacGregorStrand of OaksMike Scott of the WaterboysTodd Henry- author of Die EmptyRandy Scott HydeSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

24 Jan 20159min

Alex Cornell

Alex Cornell

This week we talk to Alex Cornell about overcoming creative blocks.Alex Cornell is an interface designer, filmmaker, and periodic musician. He lives in San Francisco and is currently working at Moonbase. He released a book in 2012 called Breakthrough that is a collection of ideas on how to break through creative block.  He cofounded Firespotter Labs. and one of his creative projects was featured on the front page of the Wall Street journal. In This Interview Alex and I Discuss...The One You Feed parable.Using comparison as a tool."Getting burnt by other people's work".How his moods are highly correlated to his creative output.Creating instead of consuming.The importance of recharging and taking breaks during the day.Finding multiple outlets for creativity.How to remain motivated over time.Tying your work into a larger purpose.Finding meaning and value in your life where you are.Using other artists "spell books"A lot of the creative process is not visible to the naked eye.There are no easy fixes for creative blocks.Alex Cornell LinksAlex Cornell HomepageAlex Cornell on TwitterAlex Cornell on FacebookAlex Cornell on YouTube Some of our most popular interviews that you might also enjoy:Dan HarrisTodd Henry- author of Die EmptyRandy Scott HydeSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

21 Jan 201539min

Mini Episode: The Parable of the Farmer and the Horse

Mini Episode: The Parable of the Farmer and the Horse

Today we discuss another parable and talk about learning to live with equanimity.  Some of our most popular interviews that you might also enjoy:Kino MacGregorStrand of OaksMike Scott of the WaterboysTodd Henry- author of Die EmptyRandy Scott HydeSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

19 Jan 20158min

Susan Piver

Susan Piver

This week we talk to Susan PiverSusan Piver is a Buddhist teacher and the New York Times bestselling author of seven books, including The Hard Questions and the award-winning How Not to Be Afraid of Your Own Life. Her latest book is entitled The Wisdom of a Broken Heart.Her eighth book, Start Here Now: A Guide to the Path and Practice of Meditation will be published this year.She is also the creator of the innovative Open Heart project, an online community to help deepen your meditation practice In This Interview Susan and I Discuss...The One You Feed parable.How everything is possible.Having an indestructible presence.The positive thinking police.How do you know when you have felt an emotion enough.Her strange friend, depression.The difference between feeling and wallowing.Depression is when nothing means anything, sadness is when everything has meaning.The difference between our feelings and our interpretation of that feeling.Feel the feeling and drop the storyline.Basic GoodnessWhether the Universe is a friendly place.Taking responsibility of our own experience.How the moment to moment commitment to watch our thoughts can cut delusion.How wisdom and compassion are inseparable. Dealing with fear.Not being afraid of ourselves or our feelings.A courageous person is not afraid of their feelings.Susan Piver LinksSusan Piver HomepageThe Open Heart ProjectSusan Piver on FacebookSusan Piver on TwitterSusan Piver Amazon Author Page Some of our most popular interviews that you might also enjoy:James ClearSrini PillayDan HarrisTodd Henry- author of Die EmptyRandy Scott HydeSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

13 Jan 201548min

Mini Episode- Knowledge Versus Action

Mini Episode- Knowledge Versus Action

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

11 Jan 20155min

Gregg Swanson

Gregg Swanson

This week we talk to Gregg Swanson about the warrior mindsetGregg Swanson is a leading, physical, emotional,  spiritual and mental strength coach and expert. He has authored several books and over 100 articles on these subjects. His life defining moment came in June of 1998 when he survived a horrific avalanche while descending from the top of Mt. Rainier. In This Interview Gregg and I Discuss...The OneYou Feed parable.The meaning of a warrior.The warrior mindset.Mental strength versus mental toughness.Mental strength cannot be developed by reading about it.Mental strength is not coming in 1st, it's finishing what you start.Changing course when things are not working.The main blocks to developing mental strength.NLP and Hypnosis.The difference between your conscious and unconscious mind.Surviving an avalanche on Mt. Ranier.Using shamanism to get in contact with your unconscious mind.High Mental Resistance and Low Mental Support.The Complacent Zone.Overcoming mental resistance.How leaders take responsibility for all of their results.The difference between a leader and a victim.Gregg Swanson LinksGregg Swanson HomepageGregg Swanson Amazon Author PageGregg Swanson TwitterWarrior Mind Coaching on Facebook Some of our most popular interviews that you might also enjoy:James ClearSrini PillayDan HarrisTodd Henry- author of Die EmptyRandy Scott HydeSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

6 Jan 201539min

Emily White

Emily White

This week we talk to Emily White about making connections in the real worldEmily White is a former lawyer turned writer. She is the author of Lonely, Learning to Live With Solitude. She has written for  the Daily Mail,  the New York Post, the Huffington Post, and The Guardian. Her latest book which will be released in January is called Count Me In: How I Stepped Off the Sidelines, Created Connection, and Built a Fuller, Richer, More Lived-in Life. In This Interview Emily and I Discuss...The One You Feed parable.Understanding loneliness.The difference between loneliness and depression.Social Depression.The exhaustion of being lonely around other people.The definition of loneliness.How it's becoming harder to make ties in our culture.Why loneliness is increasing across the society.How finding belonging takes effort.That belonging doesn't come right away.How much belonging is available if we look for it.How caring isn't cool in our culture.The difference between public and private belonging.The main objections he hears to mindfulness practice.How this is the first generation in American history that has a shorter life expectancy than their parents.Emily White LinksEmily White HomepageLonely The Book Homepage Some of our most popular interviews that you might also enjoy:James ClearSrini PillayDan HarrisTodd Henry- author of Die EmptyRandy Scott HydeSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

30 Dec 201447min

Mini Episode: Negative Emotions

Mini Episode: Negative Emotions

[powerpress]     Some of our most popular interviews that you might also enjoy:Kino MacGregorStrand of OaksMike Scott of the WaterboysTodd Henry- author of Die EmptyRandy Scott Hyde  Beans- The One You FeedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

28 Dec 20146min

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