How to Stay Calm with Strong Willed Kids? :: Kirk Martin [Ep 479] Summer of Mentorship Week Three

Their real names are Melanie Shankle and Sophie Hudson, but they’ve been blogging for a long time on the internet as Big Mama and BooMama. In addition to being authors and speakers, they also host the fun podcast The Big Boo Cast where they talk about all the important stuff: faith, family, friends, football, fashion, and food. Plus, of course, their hair. They join me for a mom friends episode where we talk about parenting teens, launching kids to college and letting go of mom guilt.  “If you were a bad mom, you wouldn't spend a lot of time worrying about if you were a bad mom. So the fact that you're feeling that guilt is like, you love your child, you're showing up, you're trying to do all the right things. And you just have to trust that God's grace covers the rest of it because they're going to be things you get wrong.” You won’t want to miss the fun and funny Melanie and Sophie. I consider them some of my mentor moms and they offer up a lot of candid advice and wisdom for playing the “long game” of parenting.  Connect with Melanie:  Website: thebigmamablog.com    Facebook: facebook.com/melanieshankle  Instagram: @melanieshankle   Connect with Sophie:  Website:  boomama.net  Facebook: facebook.com/SophieHudsonBooMama  Instagram: @boomama205 Links Mentioned:   The Big Boo Cast   BOOK: Grace Upon Grace Journaling Devotional: Trusting God No Matter What [EP 12] The Antelope in the Living Room with Melanie Shankle [EP 58] Home is Where My People Are :: Sophie Hudson [Ep 273] Navigating Friendship :: Melanie Shankle  Featured Sponsors:  BetterHelp: Visit betterhelp.com/DMA and join the over 2,000,000 people who have taken charge of their mental health with the help of an experienced professional. Special offer for Don’t Mom Alone listeners: get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/DMA.  Rothys: Keep it fresh this summer with washable shoes and bags from Rothy’s. Head to Rothys.com/DMA to find your new warm weather favorites today.

13 Sep 20211h 2min

Even without the overwhelm of the pandemic exhausting us both physically and emotionally, life inevitably brings storms our way. Storms that we can ride out with God or storms that we allow to sweep us away.  Sally Clarkson, author, speaker and mentor of moms, joins me to talk about how to weather the storms of life with grace and hope. We talk about how some anchors we can put down in stormy times, pushing into friendships, filling our cups when we are depleted and parenting our kids through life’s disappointments.  Sally also shares about how weathering life’s storms helps us care for others who are experiencing hard times better.  “Sometimes in my life I think Jesus wanted me to grow up a little bit because it was in facing my storms, learning to walk through them that I was humbled. I learned a lot. I had more compassion for other people going through storms.  I feel like the story that you live becomes the platform for your compassion for other people.” Connect with Sally:  Website:  sallyclarkson.com  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/therealsallyclarkson/  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sally.clarkson/  More Episodes with Sally: [Ep 54] How to Own Your Life :: Sally Clarkson  [Ep 107] Create a Home of Belonging & Becoming :: Sally Clarkson [Ep 149] Loving Your Difficult Child :: Sally and Nathan Clarkson [Ep 233] Cultivating Friendships in a World of Isolation :: Sally Clarkson  Links Mentioned:   BOOK: Help, I'm Drowning: Weathering the Storms of Life with Grace and Hope PDF: A Written Lament - She Reads Truth WORKBOOK: Mourning and Dancing from She Reads Truth BOOK: This Beautiful Truth by Sarah Clarkson Featured Sponsors:  Athena—Show your skin you care with the Athena Club Razor Kit! Sign up today and you’ll get 20% off your first order! Just go to AthenaClub.com and use promo code dma. Thrive Market—Go to ThriveMarket.com/DMA.  Join today to get $20 off your first order AND a FREE gift!

6 Sep 202148min

Self differentiation, emotional enmeshment and emotional cut-off… We got some new-to-me terms to learn in this episode, but you’ll be very glad you stick with us for the definitions. And I promise there won’t be a pop quiz at the end. 🤣 I’m chatting with Nancy Houston, a Licensed Professional Counselor and Certified Sex Therapist specializing in individual, marital, and sexual issues. We go deep on some important concepts that I wish I’d learned earlier on in my marriage.  The big one is self differentiation. Who am I separate from motherhood and marriage? And how can I stay a healthy individual in those roles without swinging too far either direction. Nancy shares practical tips and breaks down big concepts to get us going down the path of self discovery.  “Health is being able to hold the middle where we can have some grace for ourselves and one another. Where we can have some quiet. Until I can stop judging myself so harshly, I'll never stop judging you.” Connect with Nancy:  Website: nancyhouston.net   Facebook: facebook.com/asknancyhouston   Instagram: @asknancyhouston   Links Mentioned:   [Ep 206] Overcoming Barriers to Sexual Intimacy :: Nancy Houston  Positive Intelligence The Saboteurs  BOOK: Love & Sex: A Christian Guide to Healthy Intimacy Ripple Effects of Healthy Sexual Connection :: Francie Winslow Hula-hoop-o-logy :: Vela Tomba Featured Sponsors: Stitch Fix Kids: Schedule a fix today and get 25% off when you keep everything in your fix. Go to Stitchfix.com/DMA    Don’t Mom Alone Book: Pre-order a copy today. Feel out the form over at dontmomalone.com/book to get freebies like 6 exclusive convos with Heather and a free copy of the audiobook. Also get an invite to join her launch team.

30 Aug 202154min

If God is holy, then He can’t sin. If God can’t sin, then He can’t sin against you. If He can’t sin against you, shouldn’t that make Him the most trustworthy being there is? I’m thrilled to have Jackie Hill Perry back on the podcast to share about her much anticipated book, “Holier Than Thou”. She walks us through Scripture, shaking the dust off of “holy” as we’ve come to know it and revealing it for what it really is: good news. As it turns out, God being “holier than thou” is actually the best news in the world, and it’s the key to trusting Him. “Holiness is really abstract, but what does it have to do with me? The truth is it has everything to do with the way we live because the way we engage with the world around us is symptomatic of what we believe is true about God.” We also chat about how Jackie doesn’t “mom alone,” about her growing family and the holy calling of motherhood. This is a powerful episode!  Connect with Jackie:  Website: https://jackiehillperry.com  Facebook: facebook.com/jackiehillperrypage  Instagram: @jackiehillperry  Links Mentioned:   BOOK Holier Than Thou: How God’s Holiness Helps Us Trust Him [Ep 214] Gay Girl, Good God :: Jackie Hill Perry   FEATURED SPONSORS: Stitch Fix Kids—Try today at StitchFix.com/DMA and you’ll get 25% off when you keep everything in your Fix! Hello Fresh—Go to HelloFresh.com/dma14 and use code dma14 for up to 14 free meals, including free shipping!

23 Aug 202148min

How we feel in our bodies affects so many facets of parenting-- and in some ways you might now expect. My guest Mary Van Geffen joins me to talk about 4 Ps that can help us practice body awareness as we work on parenting our kids (even the spicy ones) with empathy and connection. “When in doubt I say choose connection rather than control. We're not going to have a lot of control and we don't have the time or the energy to follow through on things. So let's make sure we're connected because connection is the honey and it will help us to have more control.” We go in depth on how paying attention to your Presence, Posture, Proximity and Phase of your Cycle can change how you parent and bring awareness of how to honor your body and rest when you need it.  Connect with Mary:  Website:  maryvangeffen.com  Instagram: @maryvangeffen  YouTube: youtube.com/maryvangeffen   Links Mentioned:   Embodied Motherhood Worksheet with 4 Ps  Coaching with Mary use code: PODCAST for $5 off Dr. Carolyn Leaf, neuroscientist Parenting Siblings School — Join Mary’s Parenting Siblings School to treat jealousy, constant bickering, mean words, and tattling with confidence.  How To Stay Calm When Your Child is Acting Crazy PDF  Featured Sponsors: Love Every — Take the guesswork out of your child’s play. Choose Lovevery TODAY and get free shipping when you sign up to receive your Play Kits at Lovevery.com/DMA BetterHelp —Visit betterhelp.com/DMA and join the over 1,000,000 people who have taken charge of their mental health with the help of an experienced professional. Special offer for Don’t Mom Alone listeners: get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/DMA.

16 Aug 202158min

News, politics and world events are on a 24-hour and 365-day cycle. Every second something new is happening and keeping up with the latest can be a full time job. Add on top of that the bias inherent in mass media and it can be hard to tell fact from manipulated fiction.  Enter Sharon McMahon, a former high school government and law teacher on a mission to combat political misinformation. With her viral Instagram account @SharonSaysSo, she shares non-partisan facts about the US government and democracy in a way that is easy to understand. Sharon talks with me about how to be flexible thinkers and to hear both sides of a political issue using the same critical thinking skills she taught her students in high school. We also chat about her motherhood journey and raising kids who can talk respectfully with people who have different viewpoints on the world and politics.  But she doesn’t want you to listen to just her or any one person to learn the news of the day: “I don't think it is wise to just look at one human, me or your favorite political pundit or anybody, and believe that person is right 100% of the time. It is still your job to consume and figure out using your own brain, the own skills in your head to determine whether or not that aligns for you and whether or not that actually is an accurate depiction of your feelings or viewpoints. So I always caution people. Don't take one person's word as gospel because all humans are fallible.”  Connect with Sharon:  Website:  www.sharonmcmahon.com  Facebook: facebook.com/sharonsaysso  Instagram: @sharonsaysso    Links Mentioned:   Podcast: https://www.sharonmcmahon.com/podcast Sharon on The Daily Show with Trevor Noah Pre-order Don’t Mom Alone and join the Don’t Launch Alone team.  Featured Sponsors: Athena Club— Show your skin you care with the Athena Club Razor Kit! Sign up today and you’ll get 20% off your first order! Just go to AthenaClub.com and use promo code dma Rothy’s— Step up your summer wardrobe with washable, sustainable, stylish shoes and bags from Rothy’s. Head to Rothys.com/DMA to find your new warm weather favorites today.

9 Aug 202154min

In this episode, Jen shares what she’s learned about heaven (from co-leading a study for 100+ women). She also gives a super practical way to figure out how you can help a friend in need. Jen reminds us mamas to hold our children loosely. To realize we have the privilege of partnering with God, but ultimately how our children “turn out” is up to him.  And this. . . It’s hard in the crisis to build that support system. Invest in women’s lives now. Not because you’re going to need them in case you have cancer. But that the time invested in friendships, meaningful friendships is worth it.–Jen My biggest take-away from our conversation is to view my “to do” list as a “get to do” list. What joy to get to pick up my boys from school, to get to serve them meals, and to get to put them to bed! Wrapping up this summer may we all see our everyday in light of eternity. Be grateful for all our “get to”s. And invest in our sweet friendships. Read more of Jen’s story: Personal Blog What we chat about: Jen’s surprise engagement, surprise baby and surprise cancer diagnosis. Hope for the mom with chronic sickness/trauma/heartache. What Jen’s learned about how friends help well. The truths Jen gained from studying Heaven last summer. Lessons for all of us to hold our children loosely. Dealing with temper tantrums and other challenging behavior when mom is sick. The value of building strong friendships. Links Mentioned: “Not to us, Lord, not to us but to your name be the glory, because of your love and faithfulness.” (Psalm 115:1) “Send me your light and your faithful care, let them lead me; let them bring me to your holy mountain,  to the place where you dwell.” (Psalm 43:3) In Light of Eternity by Randy Alcorn “Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God.” (Colossians 3:2-3) Nobody’s Cuter than You by Melanie Shankle Just Show Up by Kara Tippetts & Jill Lynn Butelyn Featured Sponsors:  Glorify App—Glorify your relationship with God with 50% off unlimited access to premium content designed to help you get into good worship habits and grow closer to God. Download the Glorify app now, create an account and enter code DMA in the profile section for a special limited-time discount of 50%. Lovevery — Take the guesswork out of your child’s play. Choose Lovevery TODAY and get free shipping when you sign up to receive your Play Kits at Lovevery.com/DMA.

26 Juli 202156min

Mush brain. That’s how I’d describe my mind after years and years of sleep deprivation. Most young moms (especially if you had lots of littles in a row) know the challenge of forming a complete thought. Or staying focused during a quiet time. Or even having a moment alone with God. I know Jennie understands. Jennie is a sweet mom of two from Cambridge, England. She emailed me sharing struggles with sleep deprivation. Her son suffered from a serious of medical challenges leaving them with four years of interrupted sleep. She knows the power of a strong relationship with God. But in this season has found connecting deeply with Him difficult given her exhausted, “mush brain”.  The mentor that I called to answer Jennie’s questions is the amazing Sally Clarkson. Sally understands having children who don’t sleep and she’s been through her share of challenging seasons. From those experiences and others she began to mentor young moms and encourage other women to do the same . In this episode, Sally helps moms move beyond traditional spiritual disciplines to experience God in their everyday moments. Inspiring us to find the goodness of God, by intentionally filling our lives with beauty and pleasure. For the exhausted mom who longs to know God better, I hope this episode gives you peace, perspective and practical ideas. Connect with Sally Clarkson: Site :: Facebook :: Twitter :: Pinterest  What we chat about: Jennie’s Questions:  How do I have a decent quiet time when I’m exhausted? What tips do you have for getting through challenging circumstances? Does a hard season have long-term impacts on your faith? Sally’s Answers:  Motherhood is a battleground. What we struggle through is normal and women for generations have experienced it. God created us to be in community. God is present through people. Build things into your life to enjoy the goodness of God. Other topics we cover:  Journaling prayers Breath prayers Physical rest vs. soul rest Links Mentioned: Jubilee Centre Own Your Life: Living with Deep Intention, Bold Faith, and Generous Love** by Sally Clarkson MomHeart Groups How to Study Your Bible  ** by Kay Arthur (Inductive Studies) Lacey Dobrient, “The Color Method” (Hear more about it from her interview on the podcast–Episode 63 HelloMornings Philip Yancy Featured Sponsors:  Function of Beauty -- Take your quiz and get customized hair products for 20% off your first order at functionofbeauty.com/DMA Stitch Fix Kids -- Try Stitch Fix Kids today and get 25% off when you keep everything in your Fix. Go to StitchFix.com/DMA

19 Juli 202144min