145 - Josef Fritzl: Austria's Monster

145 - Josef Fritzl: Austria's Monster

On April 19th, 2008, forty-two year-old Elisabeth Fritzl helped her seventy-three year-old father Josef carry their nineteen year-old unconscious daughter Kerstin - yes, THEIR daughter, you read that right - out of a small, windowless cellar that Kerstin had literally spent her entire life inside up until this point. That day, Elisabeth felt sunlight on her skin for the first time in twenty-four years. For over two decades, she had been imprisoned and continually raped by her own father. And she lived to tell about it. Her story and the tale of her monster-father is insane. Hard to believe it actually happened. But it did. And we suck it all today on Timesuck.

Come to my standup special taping at Crofoot in Detroit on Friday, October 18th. Two shows! First is at 6:30PM: https://bit.ly/2N3E1tP

Second show is at 9PM: https://bit.ly/2FoADU6

Thanks for allowing us to donate $2400 this month the National Alliance to End Homelessness:https://endhomelessness.org/ Yip, yip, yaw!

Happy Murder Tour Standup dates: (full calendar at http://dancummins.tv)

July 26-27 Cincinnati, OH West Liberty Funnybone CLICK HERE for tix!

August 1-3 Charlotte, NC The Comedy Zone CLICK HERE for tix!

August 4 Richmond, VA The Funny Bone CLICK HERE for tix!

August 9-10 Orlando, FL The Improv CLICK HERE for tix!

*** LIVE TIMESUCK *** Orlando, FL The Improve CLICK HERE for tix!

Listen to the best of my standup on Spotify! (for free!) https://spoti.fi/2Dyy41d

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Sign up through Patreon and for $5 a month you get to listen to the Secret Suck, which will drop Thursdays at Noon, PST. You'll also get 20% off of all regular Timesuck merch PLUS access to exclusive Space Lizard merch. You get to vote on two Monday topics each month via the app. And you get the download link for my new comedy album, Feel the Heat. Check the Patreon posts to find out how to download the new album and take advantage of other benefits.


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10 - Robots, Artificial Intelligence, & Extinction?

10 - Robots, Artificial Intelligence, & Extinction?

Will we see robots that look, feel, and communicate in such lifelike ways that we won’t be able to tell them apart from other humans in our lifetime? When did the artificial intelligence movement begin? Is our progress with artificial intelligence leading to an inevitable, Skynet-like confrontation with future Terminator robots doomed to turn against us? Where are we at now with robot progress? (Hint: further than you think!)  When will we be having sex with sexy sexbots? (hint: sooner than you think!) Get ready to lose about 40 minutes of your life with this mind-bending, Westworld (sorry in advance for how I kept saying WestWOOD!) inspired Timesuck. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

21 Nov 201637min

9 - Corey Haim: Lost Years of the Lost Boy

9 - Corey Haim: Lost Years of the Lost Boy

Corey Haim went one from a teen heartthrob and one of the most bankable child stars of the late 80s to being a junkie and out-of-work actor labeled as a “has been” by the early 90s to being virtually homeless before he was thirty. Find out what happened to Dan’s onetime favorite actor in this tragic (and fascinating) edition of Timesuck! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

14 Nov 201632min

8 - A President, Mole People, and Hollow Earth Theory

8 - A President, Mole People, and Hollow Earth Theory

John Quincy Adams was the sixth President of the United States, a Massachusetts State Senator, a Harvard professor, the Secretary of State, and a member of the House of Representatives for the last 17 years of his life. He was also a man who hoped to fund an expedition to travel into the center of the Earth via the North Pole and possibly establish trade with mole people. Yup. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

7 Nov 201632min

7 - Halloween Origins

7 - Halloween Origins

What is Halloween? Where does it come from? When did people start asking for candy? When did it become an excuse for women to dress like porn stars?? All of this and more answered on a very informative and hopefully equally entertaining episode. Shove work up your ass - it’s time for Timesuck!! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

31 Okt 201635min

6 - The Mongol Mass-Beheading of Nishapur

6 - The Mongol Mass-Beheading of Nishapur

The Mongols sacked many cities over the course of their reign, but perhaps none so brutally as the Persian jewel of Nishapur in 1221. When they were done, giant pyramids of human heads stood where a majestic, cosmopolitan, Silk Road oasis had flourished only a few short days before. Be glad, so glad, you never lived on the wrong side of Genghis in this unbelievably bloody edition of Timesuck. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

24 Okt 201636min

5 - The Great Clown Scare of 2016

5 - The Great Clown Scare of 2016

Year of the creepy clown. What's behind the insane number of creepy clown sightings happening around the world? Why do we fear clowns? Have these creepy clowns actually hurt anyone? Everything you need to know about the current clown craze in this extended episode of Timesuck. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

17 Okt 201645min

4 - Sociopaths and Psychopaths

4 - Sociopaths and Psychopaths

What is a sociopath? What's a psychopath? Do you know one? Are you one? Dan breaks down the clinical definition of both and defines them in his own terms as well before nervously taking both a sociopath and a psychopath test himself. Take the tests with him and join Dan in this mentally ill edition of Timesuck! http://illnessquiz.com/sociopath-test/  http://vistriai.com/psychopathtest/ Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

10 Okt 201641min

3 - The Big One

3 - The Big One

Your chances of dying in "the big one" Southern California earthquake are roughly the same as of being shot and killed by a toddler according to a study cited by the LA Times. Is it even scientifically possible for a giant earthquake to cause LA to fall into the sea? Are there a lot of trigger happy babies out there? Find out all this and more as the show's first guest, Jacob Kubon, and Dan break down the origins and possibility of the giant earthquake legend. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

3 Okt 201633min

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