105: Ask Dr. Helen (and David) — Is There Such a Thing as Empathy Fatigue?

105: Ask Dr. Helen (and David) — Is There Such a Thing as Empathy Fatigue?

We have invited Dr. Helen Yeni-Komshian to join Fabrice and me for two consecutive podcasts on questions listeners have asked about troubled relationships. In today's podcast, we address a question from Mary about how to deal with a husband who constantly complains and exaggerates how awful things are at work, in politics, and in the world. But when Mary tries to dismiss his statements in an effort to "keep the peace," it just gets worse. His complaints escalate!

This is a common problem and you may have run into it as well. Do you have a friend or family member who loves to complain? And have you noticed that your attempts to help or point out the irrationality of his or her complaints are futile? So what SHOULD you do? What's the secret of dealing with a whiner or a complainer? Is it even possible.

Helen and David provide a myriad of information and describe techniques such as Forced Empathy, Interpersonal Decision Making, Changing the Focus, and the Five Secrets of Effective Communication. You'll LOVE this lively dialogue!

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016: Ask David — How can I cope with a complainer? How can I help a loved one who is depressed?

016: Ask David — How can I cope with a complainer? How can I help a loved one who is depressed?

How can you help a depressed friend or family member? You may be surprised to discover that the attempt to "help" is rarely effective, and may even make the problem worse. In contrast, the refusal to ...

26 Dec 201632min

015: The Five Secrets of Effective Communication (Part 2)

015: The Five Secrets of Effective Communication (Part 2)

If used skillfully, the Five Secrets can resolve nearly any relationship conflict and transform hostility, resentment and mistrust into intimacy and warmth, often with amazing speed. And although this...

19 Dec 201633min

014: The Five Secrets of Effective Communication (Part 1)

014: The Five Secrets of Effective Communication (Part 1)

Practically all of us have a friend, colleague, client, customer or family member we aren't getting along with very well. Perhaps the difficult person in your life is excessively critical of you, comp...

12 Dec 201638min

013: Ask David — Is Anxiety Inevitable?

013: Ask David — Is Anxiety Inevitable?

A fan points out that many of the examples in David's book, When Panic Attacks, are high functioning individuals with lots of education and good jobs. She asks Dr. Burns if depression and anxiety are ...

5 Dec 201625min

012: Negative and Positive Distortions (Part 3)

012: Negative and Positive Distortions (Part 3)

Discuss of "Should" Statements, Labeling, and Blame. Dr. Burns brings these distortions to life with a case of a severely depressed woman who felt profoundly guilty and devastated after her brother's ...

28 Nov 201625min

011: Negative and Positive Distortions (Part 2)

011: Negative and Positive Distortions (Part 2)

Three common distortions: Jumping to Conclusions (including Mind-Reading and Fortune-Telling), Magnification and Minimization (also called the Binocular Trick), and Emotional Reasoning.

21 Nov 201632min

010: Negative and Positive Distortions (Part 1)

010: Negative and Positive Distortions (Part 1)

Common thought distortions that trigger negative feelings: All-or-Nothing Thinking, Overgeneralization, Mental Filter, and Discounting the Positive.

18 Nov 201631min

009: Should I Try to Be Happy All the Time? Healthy vs. Unhealthy Emotions

009: Should I Try to Be Happy All the Time? Healthy vs. Unhealthy Emotions

When we're feeling depressed, anxious, or angry, should we accept our feelings or try to change them?

15 Nov 201631min

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