#109 - Why You Keep Falling in Love With The Wrong Person

#109 - Why You Keep Falling in Love With The Wrong Person

Do you attract the wrong people? Do you keep having toxic relationships? If so, you're not alone. You'd be surprised at how many people come to us for life coaching, breakup recovery, individual therapy, or dating coaching hoping to achieve one goal: Having a healthy relationship. (And how to stop getting involved in unhealthy ones). They show up to therapy or life coaching because they have, over time (or after the latest heartbreaking breakup) become aware that they are engaging in "non-ideal relationship patterns," over and over again. They keep getting involved with narcissists, or people who treat them badly. They keep choosing emotionally unavailable men, or aggressive / controlling women. Whatever the sad pattern is, they want it to stop. Above all else, they want to work on themselves to heal, grow, and ensure that NEXT time they get involved with someone they can love and be loved in a healthy relationship with a good person. And so we dig in. Identifying Your Blind Spots The first stop in figuring out why you keep choosing the wrong man or wrong woman is uncovering what unconscious motivations are driving your choices. Getting outside help in understanding your toxic relationship patterns can be a wise move, because of the entirely subconscious nature of the problem. You don't consciously choose bad relationships -- no one does. You choose what feel in the moment, are good relationships.... and then wind up having bad experiences. (That are often mysteriously, eerily similar to the past experiences you thought you were trying to avoid). Unhealthy relationship patterns can happen for many reasons. Sometimes it's old, unfinished emotional business from the past. Other times, your self-esteem or feelings of self-worth can get in the way. Yet other times, the root of the problem is imbedded in way you communicate or set boundaries with others. Because you are a complex, unique, individual, your truth will not be exactly the same as everyone else's. Avoiding Toxic Relationships However, there is one very common thing that most people have done at least once, and which will almost always lead to heartbreak: Falling victim to "Black Hat Love." Learning how to spot the one fatal factor that makes you most vulnerable to getting involved in toxic relationships can help you stop the madness, and finally create the happy, healthy relationship you're longing for. And that's what I'll be teaching you about on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. Have follow up questions for me? Leave them in the comments @ https://wp.me/p6UUlQ-92A xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

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#368 - Post-Traumatic Growth

#368 - Post-Traumatic Growth

Post traumatic growth is a real phenomenon. After traumatic things happen to us, we don’t stay broken forever. We learn and grow from our most difficult experiences and use them to live more meaningful lives.  But all of that can feel out of reach when you’re in the depths of a traumatic loss. This episode will help you begin to move in the direction of growth and healing, so you can reap the benefits of post traumatic growth.  With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com

25 Sep 202346min

#367 - Tools for Surviving Infidelity

#367 - Tools for Surviving Infidelity

You know that infidelity is survivable… but it doesn’t always feel that way when it’s happening to you. Being cheated on by someone you love and trust is a profoundly painful experience. You need some practical tools to process what happened, heal your heart, and begin moving forward again.  This episode is about the tools that will help you survive infidelity and come out the other side stronger than before. I hope you’ll join me.  With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com

18 Sep 20231h 6min

#366 - How to Connect with an Emotionally Unavailable Partner

#366 - How to Connect with an Emotionally Unavailable Partner

When you feel like you can’t connect deeply with someone you love, it’s painful. It’s common for people in relationships with emotionally unavailable partners to blame themselves, and believe that if they could just be perfect enough, then their emotionally unavailable partner would magically become responsive and available for the kind of relationship that they want to have.  This mindset makes you feel bad about yourself, and unfortunately, it can push your emotionally unavailable partner even further away. So what should you do? That’s what we’re exploring on this episode of the podcast. I hope it helps you see where your relationship’s growth opportunities are, and make choices that are right for you.  With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com

11 Sep 202350min

#365 - Setting Boundaries at Work

#365 - Setting Boundaries at Work

When you struggle to set boundaries at work, it doesn’t just intrude on your personal life, it makes it harder for you to achieve your vision of career success. Learn how to set healthy limits with coworkers, achieve work-life balance, and deal with a boss that doesn’t respect your boundaries.  All of that and more on this episode of the podcast.  Xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com

4 Sep 20231h 3min

#364 - How to Let Go of the Past

#364 - How to Let Go of the Past

Do you feel haunted by the past? Whether you’re struggling with regret, anger, or grief, having unfinished business with the past can keep you feeling stuck. But you can let go of the past and begin moving forward, and this episode will show you how.  I hope you join me for this one, all about how to let go of the past and start looking forward.  With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com

28 Aug 20231h 2min

#363 - Why We Fall Out of Love (and What to Do About It)

#363 - Why We Fall Out of Love (and What to Do About It)

Long term relationships can get a little stale when you don’t know how to keep love alive over the long haul. It’s very common for couples to believe they’ve fallen out of love when this happens. But a stronger, more fulfilling relationship is possible, and on this episode of the podcast, I’m going to tell you how.  I hope it gives you hope for your relationship and guidance on how to bridge the gap so you can feel in love with your partner again.  Xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com

21 Aug 202357min

#362 - Navigating Pregnancy as a Team

#362 - Navigating Pregnancy as a Team

Smart couples recognize that pregnancy is more than a growing-a-baby waiting game. It is a prime opportunity to work through important relationship issues and strengthen your relationship. Having a baby can feel like it’s the Pregnant Lady Show, rather than an experience that you and your partner are working through together. But the journey of pregnancy, and the challenges it offers, are opportunities for growth — for both of you.  Using these moments during pregnancy will help you know how to work as a team, improve your communication, increase your emotional intimacy, support your emotional wellbeing, and lay the foundation for the happy, healthy family life you want for yourselves and your child... but only if you know how. This episode is going to teach you how to turn the pregnancy into a positive relationship growth experience, by navigating the pregnancy experience as a team. My guests D’Anthony and Rachel Ward are experts on this subject, and today they're sharing their wisdom with you. Join us! Xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com PS: I have so much more to support you and your family in my "Happy Families" content collection. Tap in to find expert advice from the marriage and family therapists and parenting coaches on my team, as well as curated podcast playlists just for you.

14 Aug 20231h 4min

#361 - Avoid the Communication Killer: Negative Sentiment Override

#361 - Avoid the Communication Killer: Negative Sentiment Override

There’s a sneaky relationship killer lurking in your communication… but you’ve probably never heard of it.  Negative sentiment override happens when you get into the habit of reacting negatively to your partner because of bad past experiences, even when it’s not really called for in the present. It makes it hard to let go of the past and make positive changes for the future, and it can keep you feeling bogged down in unsatisfying relationship patterns.  In this episode, I’m teaching you what negative sentiment override is, why it happens, and how you can break the cycle for a stronger relationship.  With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby growingself.com

7 Aug 202346min

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