Defensiveness: Losing Relationship Strategies #6

Defensiveness: Losing Relationship Strategies #6

Create Your Strongest Year Yet as a Couple

Get Intentional With Your Relationship in 2025: Download our exact blueprint to aligning your values and planning your year, with our 2025 Yearly Couples Planning & Alignment Workbook—just $19. Get it here: https://bit.ly/2025goalsetting

"Defense is the first act of war."

Defensiveness is a corrosive behavior that goes against the purpose of marriage, which is personal growth. It is non-accountability, anti-growth, and unrepentant. Dr. John Gottman identified defensiveness as one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, which predicts divorce. Defensiveness prevents true intimacy and creates a barrier to growth. The antidote to defensiveness is taking responsibility and being open to feedback. By facing ourselves and making positive changes, we can have a profound impact on our relationships and personal growth.

Takeaways

  • Defensiveness is a corrosive behavior that hinders personal growth in relationships.
  • Dr. John Gottman identified defensiveness as one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, which predict divorce.
  • Defensiveness prevents true intimacy and creates a barrier to growth.
  • The antidote to defensiveness is taking responsibility and being open to feedback.
  • By facing ourselves and making positive changes, we can have a profound impact on our relationships and personal growth.

💬 Follow us on IG: https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/?hl=en

Det här avsnittet är hämtat från ett öppet RSS-flöde och publiceras inte av Podme. Det kan innehålla reklam.

Avsnitt(175)

Why “AND” Changes Hard Conversations

Why “AND” Changes Hard Conversations

One of the smallest words in English can quietly change the emotional climate of a marriage.In this episode, we talk about the difference between “but” and “and.” “But” often cancels whatever came bef...

26 Aug 22min

Empathy: The Antidote to Contempt

Empathy: The Antidote to Contempt

We just spent two episodes looking at contempt—the number one predictor of divorce. One of the clearest takeaways is this: empathy and contempt cannot live in the same room.When contempt is operating,...

19 Aug 33min

How to Build a Contempt-Free Marriage (it's the #1 predictor of divorce!)

How to Build a Contempt-Free Marriage (it's the #1 predictor of divorce!)

Last week we named the problem: contempt is addictive, corrosive, and the #1 predictor of divorce. This week we take up the harder question—how do we actually walk away from it?We open with an honest ...

12 Aug 29min

The Addiction of Contempt

The Addiction of Contempt

In this episode, we unpack one of the most destructive forces in modern relationships: contempt.Drawing from Arthur Brooks’ book Love Your Enemies, we explore why contempt is not just a communication ...

29 Juli 31min

Breaking the Silent Treatment: How to End the Silence and Reconnect in Your Marriage

Breaking the Silent Treatment: How to End the Silence and Reconnect in Your Marriage

We’ve all heard (or said) those loaded words: “We need to talk.” For most of us, they immediately trigger defensiveness and dread. But what happens when conversations stop altogether? In this replay e...

22 Juli 24min

Defensiveness Is a Self-Esteem Problem (And How to Fix It)

Defensiveness Is a Self-Esteem Problem (And How to Fix It)

Most of us get defensive without even realizing it — and it’s one of the fastest ways connection breaks down in marriage. In this episode, we explore why defensiveness is actually a self-esteem issue ...

16 Juli 30min

Mini Episode: Real Self Esteem, Shame & Grandiosity (Listener Questions)

Mini Episode: Real Self Esteem, Shame & Grandiosity (Listener Questions)

In this quick mid-week bonus episode, Sharla answers two listener questions from our current series on Real Self Esteem and the distortions of shame and grandiosity.We explore:Why you can feel confide...

10 Juli 4min

How Adapting to Trauma Wires Us for Shame

How Adapting to Trauma Wires Us for Shame

This is part two of our shame series. Be sure to listen to last week's episode for an introduction into shame and how it relates to self-esteem.In this episode, we go deeper into the real reason shame...

8 Juli 29min

Populärt inom Utbildning

historiepodden-se
det-skaver
rss-bara-en-till-om-beroende-medberoende
nu-blir-det-historia
harrisons-dramatiska-historia
rss-viktmedicinpodden
not-fanny-anymore
johannes-hansen-podcast
roda-vita-rosen
allt-du-velat-veta
i-vantan-pa-katastrofen
rss-max-tant-med-max-villman
rikatillsammans-om-privatekonomi-rikedom-i-livet
sektledare
rss-basta-livet
rss-traningsklubben
sa-in-i-sjalen
rss-foraldramotet-bring-lagercrantz
rss-ar-det-rimligt
sex-pa-riktigt-med-marika-smith