The Sunday Read: ‘How I Learned That the Problem in My Marriage Was Me’
The Daily9 Mars

The Sunday Read: ‘How I Learned That the Problem in My Marriage Was Me’

One thing I’ve learned from being married to my wife, Jess, who is a couples therapist, is how vast the distance is between the masks people show to the world and the messy realities that live behind them. Every couple knows its own drama, but we still fall prey to the illusion that all other couples have seamlessly satisfying relationships. The truth about marriage — including my own — is that even the most functional couples are merely doing the best they can with the lives that have been bestowed on them.

This past spring, Jess and I had the first of eight sessions of couples therapy with Terry Real, a best-selling author and by far the most famous of the therapists we’ve seen during our marriage. Real, whose admirers include Gwyneth Paltrow and Bruce Springsteen, is one of a small number of thinkers who are actively shaping how the couples-therapy field is received by the public and practiced by other therapists. He is also the bluntest and most charismatic of the therapists I’ve seen, the New Jersey Jewish version of Robin Williams’s irascible Boston character in “Good Will Hunting” — profane, charismatic, open about his own life, forged in his own story of pain.

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How Elon Musk Is Infiltrating Washington

How Elon Musk Is Infiltrating Washington

Elon Musk and his team have taken a hacksaw to the federal bureaucracy one agency at a time, and the question has become whether he’s on a crusade that will leave the government paralyzed or deliver a shake-up it has needed for years.Jonathan Swan, a White House reporter for The New York Times, takes us inside this hostile takeover of Washington.Guests: Jonathan Swan, a White House reporter for The New York Times.Background reading: Inside Mr. Musk’s aggressive incursion into the federal government.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Photo: Mike Segar/Reuters Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

5 Feb 32min

North America Averted a Trade War — for Now

North America Averted a Trade War — for Now

North America came within hours of a multibillion dollar trade war that was poised to hobble the economies of Mexico and Canada.The Times journalists Ana Swanson, Matina Stevis-Gridneff and Simon Romero discuss the last-minute negotiations that headed off the crisis — for now.Guests: Ana Swanson, who covers trade and international economics for The New York Times; Matina Stevis-Gridneff, the Canada bureau chief for The New York Times; and Simon Romero, an international correspondent for The New York Times based in Mexico City.Background reading: President Trump agreed to delay tariffs on Mexico and Canada for a month after both countries pledged to do more to block drugs and migrants.What does Mr. Trump really want from Canada and Mexico?For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Photo: Jeff Kowalsky/Agence France-Presse — Getty Images Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

4 Feb 31min

China Challenges Silicon Valley for A.I. Dominance

China Challenges Silicon Valley for A.I. Dominance

Financial markets went into a panic last week over an obscure Chinese tech start-up called DeepSeek. The company now threatens to upend the world of artificial intelligence and the race for who will dominate it.Kevin Roose, a tech columnist at The Times, discusses how DeepSeek caught us all off guard.Guests: Kevin Roose, a technology columnist for The New York Times and co-host of the Times tech podcast, “Hard Fork.”Background reading: DeepSeek’s model has rocked Silicon Valley and upended several fundamental assumptions about A.I. progress.Listen to “Hard Fork”: Your guide to the DeepSeek freakout.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Photo: Greg Baker/Agence France-Presse Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

3 Feb 23min

The Sunday Read: ‘Chronic Pain Is a Hidden Epidemic. It’s Time for a Revolution.’

The Sunday Read: ‘Chronic Pain Is a Hidden Epidemic. It’s Time for a Revolution.’

Here’s a strange story: One day two summers ago, Jennifer Kahn woke up because her arms — both of them — hurt. Not the way they do when you’ve slept in a funny position, but as if the tendons in her forearms and hands were moving through mud. What felt like sharp electric shocks kept sparking in her fingers and sometimes up the inside of her biceps and across her chest. Holding anything was excruciating: a cup, a toothbrush, her phone. Even doing nothing was miserable. It hurt when she sat with her hands in her lap, when she stood, when she lay flat on the bed or on her side. The slightest pressure — a bedsheet, a watch band, a bra strap — was intolerable.Our understanding of pain, and especially chronic pain, is far behind where it should be. We don’t know what causes a person with an injury to develop chronic pain, or why it happens in some people and not others, or why it happens more often in women. At a genetic and cellular level, we don’t know which systems get out of whack, or why, or how to fix them. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

2 Feb 46min

'The Interview': Digital Drugs Have Us Hooked. Dr. Anna Lembke Sees a Way Out.

'The Interview': Digital Drugs Have Us Hooked. Dr. Anna Lembke Sees a Way Out.

The psychiatrist and author of “Dopamine Nation” wants us to find balance in a world of temptation and abundance. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

1 Feb 41min

Trump 2.0 Arrives in Force

Trump 2.0 Arrives in Force

Since his inauguration, President Trump has exercised a level of power that has directly challenged the checks and balances that, on paper, define the U.S. government.The Times journalists Michael Barbaro, Maggie Haberman, Jonathan Swan and Charlie Savage discuss Mr. Trump’s plan to institute a more powerful presidency.Guests: Maggie Haberman, a White House correspondent for The New York Times.Jonathan Swan, a White House reporter for The New York Times.Charlie Savage, national security and legal policy for The New York Times.Background reading: Mr. Trump’s “flood the zone” strategy has left opponents gasping in outrage.From Day 1 of hs second term, Mr. Trump has tested the limits of his authority.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

31 Jan 27min

What We Know About the Plane Crash

What We Know About the Plane Crash

The midair collision between a passenger jet and a helicopter over Washington on Wednesday night was the deadliest plane crash in the United States in more than 20 years.Emily Steel, a Times investigative reporter who has been covering the crash, explains what happened.Guests: Emily Steel, an investigative reporter for the business desk of The New York Times.Background reading: The crash has renewed concerns about air safety lapses.Staffing was “not normal” in the control tower at Ronald Reagan National Airport, according to an F.A.A. report.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

31 Jan 22min

How R.F.K. Jr. and ‘Medical Freedom’ Rose to Power

How R.F.K. Jr. and ‘Medical Freedom’ Rose to Power

Robert F. Kennedy Jr. faced a crucial nomination hearing on Wednesday where a panel of skeptical senators probed his past, often contentious remarks.Sheryl Gay Stolberg, who covers health policy for The Times, explains how someone who’s considered on the fringe in a lot of his beliefs came to be picked for health secretary to begin with.Guests: Sheryl Gay Stolberg, a correspondent based in Washington covering health policy for The New York Times.Background reading: How addiction and trauma shaped Mr. Kennedy’s turbulent life.In the hearing, Mr. Kennedy defended his shifting views on vaccines and abortion.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

30 Jan 35min

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