The Sunday Read: ‘How I Learned That the Problem in My Marriage Was Me’
The Daily9 Mars

The Sunday Read: ‘How I Learned That the Problem in My Marriage Was Me’

One thing I’ve learned from being married to my wife, Jess, who is a couples therapist, is how vast the distance is between the masks people show to the world and the messy realities that live behind them. Every couple knows its own drama, but we still fall prey to the illusion that all other couples have seamlessly satisfying relationships. The truth about marriage — including my own — is that even the most functional couples are merely doing the best they can with the lives that have been bestowed on them.

This past spring, Jess and I had the first of eight sessions of couples therapy with Terry Real, a best-selling author and by far the most famous of the therapists we’ve seen during our marriage. Real, whose admirers include Gwyneth Paltrow and Bruce Springsteen, is one of a small number of thinkers who are actively shaping how the couples-therapy field is received by the public and practiced by other therapists. He is also the bluntest and most charismatic of the therapists I’ve seen, the New Jersey Jewish version of Robin Williams’s irascible Boston character in “Good Will Hunting” — profane, charismatic, open about his own life, forged in his own story of pain.

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A Turning Point for Ultraprocessed Foods

A Turning Point for Ultraprocessed Foods

A new study has found that nearly three-quarters of American adults are now obese or overweight, and there’s growing concern — among politicians, scientists and consumers — about one potential culprit: ultraprocessed foods.Guest: Alice Callahan, a nutrition and health reporter for The New York Times, discusses how these foods came to be such a big part of what we eat, and why that’s so hard to change. Background reading: There’s not enough evidence to recommend avoiding ultraprocessed foods, a scientific advisory committee says. Some experts disagree.Name a common condition — heart disease, Type 2 diabetes, cancer, dementia, irritable bowel syndrome — and chances are good that a diet high in ultraprocessed foods has been linked to it. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

13 Dec 202429min

How China Hacked America’s Phone Network

How China Hacked America’s Phone Network

An alarming new hack by China has penetrated the nerve center of the United States: its telephone network.David E. Sanger, the White House and national security correspondent for The New York Times, discusses what the scope of the attack tells us about China’s growing power.Guest: David E. Sanger, the White House and national security correspondent for The New York Times.Background reading: The chairman of the Senate Intelligence Committee said hackers listened to phone calls and read texts by exploiting aging equipment and seams in the networks that connect systems.Emerging details of Chinese hack have left U.S. officials increasingly concerned.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

12 Dec 202432min

Notre-Dame Rises From the Ashes

Notre-Dame Rises From the Ashes

On Sunday, after a fire that many feared would destroy it, and a swift renovation that defied all predictions, the Cathedral of Notre-Dame reopened to the public.Michael Kimmelman, the chief architecture critic at The Times, tells the story of the miracle on the Seine.Guest: Michael Kimmelman, the architecture critic of The New York Times and the founder and editor-at-large of Headway.Background reading: Critic’s Notebook: Notre-Dame’s astonishing rebirth from the ashes.The rebuilding took about 250 companies, 2,000 workers, about $900 million, a tight deadline and a lot of national pride.See photos from the reopening.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

11 Dec 202438min

The Manhunt, the Manifesto and the Murder Charge

The Manhunt, the Manifesto and the Murder Charge

Last week, the chief executive of UnitedHealthcare was shot and killed in Manhattan. A five-day search for the gunman ensued.On Monday, a 26-year-old suspect, Luigi Mangione, was arrested in Pennsylvania after an employee at a McDonald’s recognized him and called the police.Dionne Searcey, who covers wealth and corporations, and Maria Cramer, a crime reporter in New York City, break down what we know about the suspect, and what the case has revealed about many Americans’ contempt for insurance companies.Guest: Dionne Searcey, a reporter for The New York Times writing about how the choices made by people and corporations affect the future of our planet.Maria Cramer, a reporter for The New York Times covering the New York Police Department and crime in the city and surrounding areas.Background reading: The suspect was an Ivy League tech graduate from a prominent Maryland family who in recent months had suffered physical and psychological pain.A visual timeline of the UnitedHealthcare C.E.O. shooting.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

10 Dec 202422min

Inside The Fall Of Syria’s Brutal Dictator

Inside The Fall Of Syria’s Brutal Dictator

Syria has been controlled by one family for more than half a century who ruled by repression, devastation and violence.But about two weeks ago, the regime began to falter, and then over the course of one night, it collapsed.Carlotta Gall, a senior correspondent for The New York Times, discusses the fall of Bashar al-Assad and what comes next.Guest: Carlotta Gall, a senior correspondent for The New York Times, focusing on the human aspect of wars and civil strife.Background reading: Live updates: The rebels who toppled Assad face stark challenges in Syria.With Assad gone, a brutal dictatorship ends. But the new risks are huge.For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

9 Dec 202425min

From DealBook: Alex Cooper on Building a Media Brand

From DealBook: Alex Cooper on Building a Media Brand

The host of the “Call Her Daddy” podcast and founder of the Unwell Network discusses her interview with Vice President Kamala Harris ahead of the 2024 election, her podcast’s journey from chatting about sex advice to delving into more serious subjects and how the Unwell Network’s fan merchandise became a eight-figure business.“I don’t care if people consider me a journalist or a podcaster, or just a girl that talks online every week.”This interview was with Andrew Ross Sorkin of The New York Times at the annual DealBook Summit and recorded live in front of an audience at Jazz at Lincoln Center. Read more about highlights from the day at https://www.nytimes.com/live/2024/12/04/business/dealbook-summit-newsUnlock full access to New York Times podcasts and explore everything from politics to pop culture. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

8 Dec 202426min

'The Interview': Tilda Swinton Would Like a Word With Trump About His Mother

'The Interview': Tilda Swinton Would Like a Word With Trump About His Mother

The Academy Award-winning actress discusses her lifelong quest for connection, humanity’s innate goodness and the point of being alive. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

7 Dec 202452min

The Texas Village Rethinking Homelessness

The Texas Village Rethinking Homelessness

Warning: this episode contains strong language.In Austin, Texas, a local businessman has undertaken one of the nation’s biggest and boldest efforts to confront the crisis of chronic homelessness.Lucy Tompkins, a national reporter for The Times, takes us inside the multimillion-dollar experiment, to understand its promise and peril.Guest: Lucy Tompkins, who reports on national news for The New York Times.Background reading: Can a big village full of tiny homes ease homelessness in Austin?For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Transcripts of each episode will be made available by the next workday. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

6 Dec 202437min

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