Episode 401: The Scort on the Bas Goes Bip Bip Bip

By day I’m a simple bartender…but by night…ahh!!! I really let my hair down and I become…The Beverage Entrepreneur! No you haven’t stumbled your way into one of the middling lunchpail Comedy Bang Bang episodes that didn’t even make it into the annual Top 10, you’re actually listening to one of the funniest episodes of YKS ever! On today’s very show, we have a nice Adult Toy that can Help, a sparkling water that will send the wokies reeing, and finally a use for those pesky plastic straws we’re all trying to buy more of. Plus, a few other things, like a celebrity who clearly wasn’t briefed on what the show is about and they get mad halfway through and we kinda gotta just gut it out! Oh well! Discuss it on the subreddit! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Social Media by Maddalena Alvarez.YKS Premium - Miketober comes but once a year! And so do most of our listeners! Sign up today at Patreon.com/YourKickstarterSucks to catch every pulse-pounding episode and hell, maybe you’ll even bust a nut! I don’t know!Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod, TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks and subscribe to our YouTube channel for more video stuff! This week’s episode is brought to you by these fine brands:Factor - Head to factormeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box and 20% off your next month. Unless you hate yummy food?? Buhh??See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

7 Okt 20242h 9min

Go home, YKS…you’re drunk! Oh wait no you aren’t. You’re just making another good ass funny ass episode of the show we all love to listen to. And after all, the show is quite beloved by many all around the world…so why wouldn’t we make more episodes of it? Well maybe we will get bored or hit by a bus or something. But not this week! We did one. And on it, we had some good ass shit such as the following: a movie about how to time travel, a drink that mixes up it own self for you and there’s no booze or mixer in it, and also something called Morphy Richards. Morphy Richards. Well anyway, it sounds funny. So. Bring your sense of humor! It’s required!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Social Media by Maddalena Alvarez.YKS Premium is the ONLY place you can find the frequently-listened-to, fake movie trivia and plot recap series MIKETOBER! Coming to Patreon this month! And presumably for many years thereafter. But for now, head on over to Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks to belly up to the movie bar and suck down a bottle of cinema suds with your buds Mike and JF!Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands: Rocket Money - Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster (like a rocket or some other similarly speedy mode of transport!!!) Get Rocket Money today at RocketMoney.com/YKSSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

30 Sep 20241h 57min

I’m out of town so I’m gonna make this one quick, alright? Girl Scout Cookies are cookies sold by Girl Scouts in the United States to raise funds to support Girl Scout councils and individual troops. The cookies are widely popular and are commonly sold by going door-to-door, online, through school or town fundraisers, or at "cookie booths" set up at storefronts.[1] The program is intended to both raise money and improve the financial literacy of girls. During an average selling season (usually January through April), more than one million girls sell over 200 million packages of cookies and raise over $800 million.[2][3] The first known sale of cookies by Girl Scouts was in 1917.[4][5][6] Cookie sales are organized by 112 regional Girl Scout councils[7] who select one of two national bakeries to buy cookies from.[3][8]Plus we learn about Disease X.Video of this episode is available at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucksMusic for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

23 Sep 20241h 52min

Where Faith Meets Fun! Where Faith Meets Fun! Where Faith Meets Fun! Right here, on YKS! On today’s show we got dog vitamins, something that improves voicemail somehow (other than making your outgoing message a recording of you in the bathroom with your buddy), and the one and only, the man without whom none of this would be possible, the great Jan-Ove Waldner! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. It may just be mid September…but already our eyes turn…to Miketober! Get all the scaretacular fun on YKS Premium in just a couple of weeks!Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Factor - You get a meal! And you get a meal! And you get a meal! Look under your chair…there’s a meal there! That is, if you have a chair on your porch or in your yard or in the office downstairs where the packages get delivered! Because with Factor, it’s never been easier to eat meals. Head to FACTORMEALS.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

16 Sep 20242h 14min

Sometimes you’ll look at the title of an episode and think to yourself, “Oh yeah, I remember why the title of the episode was gonna be this. Because we did a good riff on what The Duckcaller’s Lament would be. And then you got some times where you have to write “Pumpkin Master’s Sake Bones” down in the title box, and you wish you could crawl into a hole and die. There are a lot more of those weeks. Anyway on today’s show, we got Lil’ Entrepreneurs, a movie that feels like a fake movie inside a fake movie, and a nice Guilt App that makes you feel bad for just sitting around doing nothing evil. And plus, God willing, a riff about Sake Bones that justifies this incomprehensible mishmash of an episode title. Please. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Whether it’s talking more about Kickstarter, or talking to our friends about old men’s buttholes, YKS Premium is the destination for even more DB and JF content! $5/mo gets you a bonus episode of the show every single damn week, ad free episodes, and access to the exclusive YKS Pisscord! Think of it like a club with a bunch of guys in it who don’t like going to clubs. And oh yeah, I’m the boss. Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:Rocket Money - Save money, dammit!!! With Rocket Money. At RocketMoney.com/YKSSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

9 Sep 20242h 27min

Weee-hoo!! Yowee!! We got a Class 5 YKS comin in hot so we’re gonna wanna get all the way around it and drop our headphones right in its path! Yeah the first one kind of already did all this but this one has a bunch of 20 year olds in it so…yeeehawww!!! Well I’d keep joking about that crap but I haven’t finished watching it yet. Stick around for part 2 of the Twisters 2 Riff in the next episode description. Until then, you’ll have to be satisfied with an app for battle rapping, a way to keep your desserts warm on the go, and a decidedly unwoke independent movie! It’s a YKS Thing, baby! You probably do understand.Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium – Now that’s what I call YKS! Get 4 or 5 more episodes of our crazy content every month at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks!Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands: Factor - Oh the food you’ll eat! Oh the snacks you will munch! When you get Factor Meals for Dinner and Lunch! Go to FactorMeals.com/yks50 for 50% off first box plus 20% off your next monthSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

2 Sep 20241h 45min

MORTUY: Oh geez Rick, I don’t know about this one Rick. It looks like we accidentally portaled to a planet where there’s a ruling race of sentient Kickstarter projects! Oh man, oh geez Rick. I just want to go home and pull my pud man. I don’t want to do all this space flying stuff anymore man. Look at that one…it’s like a stupid pirate card game and it’s coming at me! Ahh!! And look over there, it’s a stupid podcast about how we’re all the same! Oh god it’s horrifying. But I think I’m most terrified of the guy who went to do some sex tourism and thought it was cute! Okay that’s a real guy so it’s not really like an alien thing but man that’s really scary, too. Right, Rick? Uhh…rick??RICK: (Flashing his space credit card) One for booty on the poop deck, please! Morpy I love you. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. You know how you sometimes see an out of order toilet that people clearly still kept shitting into even though there was no way it could take down even the amount of poop and pee and toilet paper it already had in there? Yep. YKS PremiumFollow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

26 Aug 20241h 58min

You’re not gonna believe this one! Oh yeah! What! That’s right! It’s more of that CRAZY Thing you love! Oh yeah! YKS! Wahoo!!!!On today’s Wet and Wild show, we’ve got a graphic novel (comic book), one gross freako’s stupid movie idea warehouse, an app for DUI guys, and more! Wow, that sounds really Wet and Wild. Oh yes it definitely does. So we better get to it! Oh yeah! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium is where you’re gonna wanna go…where nobody knows your name! Yeah we keep it pretty anonymous over there behind the paywall, unless someone stops you in the middle of the street and asks you what you’re listening to, and you have to go, “Uh…I don’t know…Sissy brainwashing mp3s?” Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucksThis episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands: Rocket Money - Huh? What? I thought a broke person said something! Hey it’s 2024 and we could use every little dollar we can get. Big or small, all dollars are important! And a lot of them end up going to subscriptions I couldn’t give 2 flips about. So let’s get Rocket Money in there to help staunch the bleeding! Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/YKS. Factor One “factor” I use to determine my meal-happiness quotient (MHQ) is the amount of good discount I’m apply to my cart! Of course there are many others as well. But, the discount code is the…denominator (??). Well anyway. For a MHQ of over 9000…use code YKS50 at FactorMeals.com/YKS50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month while your subscription is active!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

19 Aug 20241h 46min