163. Losing Mothers and Finding Them Again Through Memoir featuring Rebe Huntman

Kathleen Dorothy Blackburn joins Let’s Talk Memoir for a conversation about listening to and putting our younger selves on the page, recognizing family codes we can no longer adhere to, place as a character in memoir, writing like nobody will ever see our work, how shame and pain can manifest as silence, sharing with readers what we may not be able to reveal to loved ones, the contracts we enter as writers of memoir, creating intimacy on the page, and her new memoir Loose of Earth.   Also mentioned in this episode:  -the toll of forever chemicals on our bodies and homes -incorporating environmental elements -managing our grief   Books mentioned in this episode: -Mill Town by Kerrie Arsenault -Full Body Burden by Kristen Iverson -The Yellow House by Sarah Broom -Ground Glass by Karen Savage   Kathleen Dorothy Blackburn teaches in the University of Chicago Creative Writing Program. She is a Pushcart Prize nominee whose work has appeared in Colorado Review, Guernica, Gulf Coast, Pleiades, and swamp pink, and was listed as notable in Best American Essays.   Connect with Kathleen: Website: https://www.kdblackburn.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thequietwildlife/ Get her book: https://bookshop.org/p/books/loose-of-earth-a-memoir-kathleen-dorothy-blackburn/20690152 — Ronit’s writing has appeared in The Atlantic, The Rumpus, The New York Times, The Iowa Review, Hippocampus, The Washington Post, Writer’s Digest, American Literary Review, and elsewhere. Her memoir WHEN SHE COMES BACK about the loss of her mother to the guru Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh and their eventual reconciliation was named Finalist in the 2021 Housatonic Awards Awards, the 2021 Indie Excellence Awards, and was a 2021 Book Riot Best True Crime Book. Her short story collection HOME IS A MADE-UP PLACE won Hidden River Arts’ 2020 Eludia Award and the 2023 Page Turner Awards for Short Stories. She earned an MFA in Nonfiction Writing at Pacific University, is Creative Nonfiction Editor at The Citron Review, and lives in Seattle with her family where she teaches memoir workshops and is working on her next book. More about Ronit: https://ronitplank.com   Sign up for monthly podcast and writing updates: https://bit.ly/33nyTKd   Follow Ronit: https://www.instagram.com/ronitplank/ https://twitter.com/RonitPlank https://www.facebook.com/RonitPlank   Background photo credit: Photo by Patrick Tomasso on Unsplash Headshot photo credit: Sarah Anne Photography Theme music: Isaac Joel, Dead Moll’s Fingers

18 Apr 202449min

Kate Manne joins Let’s Talk Memoir for a conversation about coming of age in fatphobic culture, disentangling the threads of weight, health, and diet culture, the racism at the root of anti-fatness, writing ourselves out and then back into our work, the psycho-social consequences of fatphobia on our bodies, the shame around shame, organizing our time, writing while mothering a young child, gathering and incorporating research in our work, and her new book Unshrinking: How to Face Fatphobia.   Also in this episode: -the rhetoric around dieting -becoming self-compassionate through writing -why we might not trust pleasure    Books mentioned in this episode: Fearing the Black Body by Sabrina Strings Belly of the Beast: The Politics of Anti-Fatness as Anti-Blackness by Da’Shaun L. Harrison Hunger by Roxanne Gay You Just Need to Lose Weight by Aubrey Gordon What We Don't Talk About When We Talk About Fat by Aubrey Gordon Fat Talk by Virginia Sole Smith   Kate Manne is an associate professor of philosophy at Cornell University, where she’s been teaching since 2013. Before that, she was a junior fellow at the Harvard Society of Fellows. Manne did her graduate work in philosophy at MIT, and works in moral, social, and feminist philosophy. She is the author of three books, Down Girl: The Logic of Misogyny, Entitled: How Male Privilege Hurts Women, and Unshrinking: How to Face Fatphobia, which came out in January. You can subscribe to her substack newsletter, More to Hate, for musings on misogyny, fatphobia, their intersection, and more.  Connect with Kate: Website: http://www.katemanne.net/ Substack: https://katemanne.substack.com/ X: https://twitter.com/kate_manne, Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kate_manne Get “Unshrinking” here: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/722318/unshrinking-by-kate-manne/   Kate Manne's first interview with Ronit on The Body Myth: https://ronitplank.com/2024/03/04/the-body-myth-misogyny-fatphobia-and-the-morality-of-size-ft-dr- About Ronit Subscribe to Ronit's Memoir Substack: https://substack.com/@ronitplank?utm_source=profile-page Ronit’s writing has appeared in The Atlantic, The Rumpus, The New York Times, The Iowa Review, Hippocampus, The Washington Post, Writer’s Digest, American Literary Review, and elsewhere. Her memoir WHEN SHE COMES BACK about the loss of her mother to the guru Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh and their eventual reconciliation was named Finalist in the 2021 Housatonic Awards Awards, the 2021 Indie Excellence Awards, and was a 2021 Book Riot Best True Crime Book. Her short story collection HOME IS A MADE-UP PLACE won Hidden River Arts’ 2020 Eludia Award and the 2023 Page Turner Awards for Short Stories. She earned an MFA in Nonfiction Writing at Pacific University, is Creative Nonfiction Editor at The Citron Review, and lives in Seattle with her family where she teaches memoir workshops and is working on her next book. More about Ronit: https://ronitplank.com Subscribe to Ronit’s Substack: https://substack.com/@ronitplank Sign up for monthly podcast and writing updates: https://bit.ly/33nyTKd   Follow Ronit: https://www.instagram.com/ronitplank/ https://twitter.com/RonitPlank https://www.facebook.com/RonitPlank   Background photo credit: Photo by Patrick Tomasso on Unsplash Headshot photo credit: Sarah Anne Photography Theme music: Isaac Jo

16 Apr 202459min

Suzette Mullen joins Let’s Talk Memoir for a conversation about digging to find a deeper story and the question we need to ask in memoir, discovering where to begin by getting to the end of our manuscripts, the revision process as revelatory, the effect our memoirs have on loved ones, leaning on trusted readers and writers, her work as a nonfiction book coach, and her coming of age and coming out memoir The Only Way Through is Out.   Also in this episode:  -the querying process -working with a book coach -finding professional purpose   Books mentioned in this episode: In the Dream House by Carmen Maria Machado She’s Not There: A Life in Two Genders by Jennifer Finney Boylan   Suzette Mullen (she/her) is a memoir and nonfiction book coach, retreat leader, and the author of the memoir The Only Way Through Is Out, published by the University of Wisconsin Press. Her essays have appeared in the New York Times, today.com, and Brevity among other outlets. As a book coach, Suzette guides writers to find their deeper stories and define their big ideas. A graduate of Harvard Law School and Wellesley College, and the mother of two young adult sons, Suzette made a big leap professionally and personally at midlife and now lives in Pennsylvania with her wife and their rescue pup.   Connect with Suzette: Website: https://www.yourstoryfinder.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/urstoryfinder/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/suzette-mullen-lgbtq-book-coach/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/yourstoryfinder Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Suzette-Mullen-Author/100063523689955/ For info about the memoir: https://www.yourstoryfinder.com/books My free e-book: "Behind the Scenes: An Insider’s Guide to THE ONLY WAY THROUGH IS OUT https://www.yourstoryfinder.com/behindthescenes   — About Ronit Subscribe to Ronit's Memoir Substack: https://substack.com/@ronitplank?utm_source=profile-page Ronit’s writing has appeared in The Atlantic, The Rumpus, The New York Times, The Iowa Review, Hippocampus, The Washington Post, Writer’s Digest, American Literary Review, and elsewhere. Her memoir WHEN SHE COMES BACK about the loss of her mother to the guru Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh and their eventual reconciliation was named Finalist in the 2021 Housatonic Awards Awards, the 2021 Indie Excellence Awards, and was a 2021 Book Riot Best True Crime Book. Her short story collection HOME IS A MADE-UP PLACE won Hidden River Arts’ 2020 Eludia Award and the 2023 Page Turner Awards for Short Stories. She earned an MFA in Nonfiction Writing at Pacific University, is Creative Nonfiction Editor at The Citron Review, and lives in Seattle with her family where she teaches memoir workshops and is working on her next book.   More about Ronit: https://ronitplank.com Sign up for monthly podcast and writing updates: https://bit.ly/33nyTKd   Follow Ronit: https://www.instagram.com/ronitplank/ https://twitter.com/RonitPlank https://www.facebook.com/RonitPlank   Background photo credit: Photo by Patrick Tomasso on Unsplash Headshot photo credit: Sarah Anne Photography Theme music: Isaac Jo

9 Apr 202443min

Mimi Zieman joins Let’s Talk Memoir for a conversation about thinking of ourselves as characters, hooking readers from the beginning, playing with structure, balancing our reflective narrator, trusting your reader and not overexplaining, the true self and the invisible self, when to listen to others and when to listen to ourselves, being the only woman on a historic climbing expedition, and her memoir Tap Dancing on Everest: A Young Doctor’s Unlikely Adventure.   Also in this episode: -growing up a child of Holocaust survivors -pitching at live conferences -having patience with ourselves   Books mentioned in this episode: The Situation and the Story by Vivian Gornick Fierce Attachments by Vivian Gornick Heavy by Kiese Laymon Wild by Cheryl Strayed Make a Scene by Jordan E. Rosenfeld To Show and to Tell by Phillip Lopate Seven Drafts: Self-Edit Like a Pro from Blank Page to Book  by Allison K. Williams Bird by Bird by Anne Lammot Books by John Krakauer Books by Joan Didion   Mimi Zieman MD is the author of Tap Dancing on Everest: A Young Doctor’s Unlikely Adventure, and The Post-Roe Monologues, a play that has been performed in multiple cities. A board-certified OB/GYN specialized in Complex Family Planning, she has also co-authored sixteen editions of Managing Contraception. Her writing has appeared in The Sun Magazine, Ms. Magazine, Newsweek, Dorothy Parker’s Ashes, NBC News THINK, The Forward, and other publications. She’s spoken nationally and internationally and has been interviewed by major media outlets. Ranking high on her list of favorite things are a good adventure, dancing, and a rich cup of coffee.    Connect with Mimi: Website: www.mimiziemanmd.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mimiziemanmd/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/mimiziemanmd Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mimiziemanmd/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mimi-zieman-md-44ba68b/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mimiziemanmd    Get Mimi’s Book: Amazon: https://amzn.to/41sFEnB Bookshop: https://bit.ly/3Rjk9kk   About Ronit Subscribe to Ronit's Memoir Substack: https://substack.com/@ronitplank?utm_source=profile-page Ronit’s writing has appeared in The Atlantic, The Rumpus, The New York Times, The Iowa Review, Hippocampus, The Washington Post, Writer’s Digest, American Literary Review, and elsewhere. Her memoir WHEN SHE COMES BACK about the loss of her mother to the guru Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh and their eventual reconciliation was named Finalist in the 2021 Housatonic Awards Awards, the 2021 Indie Excellence Awards, and was a 2021 Book Riot Best True Crime Book. Her short story collection HOME IS A MADE-UP PLACE won Hidden River Arts’ 2020 Eludia Award and the 2023 Page Turner Awards for Short Stories. She earned an MFA in Nonfiction Writing at Pacific University, is Creative Nonfiction Editor at The Citron Review, and lives in Seattle with her family where she teaches memoir workshops and is working on her next book. More about Ronit: https://ronitplank.com   Sign up for monthly podcast and writing updates: https://bit.ly/33nyTKd   Follow Ronit: https://www.instagram.com/ronitplank/ https://twitter.com/RonitPlank https://www.facebook.com/RonitPlank   Background photo credit: Photo by Patrick Tomasso on Unsplash Headshot photo credit: Sarah Anne Photography Theme music: Isaac Joel, Dead Moll’s Fingers

4 Apr 202447min

Lisa Cooper Ellison joins Let’s Talk Memoir for a conversation about therapy vs. memoir, taking care of our nervous systems while working on charged material, writing about trauma without retraumatizing ourselves, developing a robust self-care practice, how to avoid creating victim narratives in our memoirs, what to do with gaps in our memory, putting more of ourselves on the page, and her new podcast Writing Your Resilience.   Also in this episode: -signs of a trauma response -learning how to be present -neuroplasticity    Book mentioned in this episode: Writing to Heal by James Pennebaker Healing Trauma: Restoring the Wisdom of the Body by Peter A. Levine Trauma and Memory by Peter A. Levine Becoming the Love You Seek by Dr. Nicole Lepera Stash by Laura Cathcart Robbins Acetylene Torch Songs by Sue William Silverman What Happened to You by Bruce D. Perry and Oprah Winfrey Hunger by Roxanne Gay Another Bullshit Night in Suck City by Nick Flynn   Lisa Cooper Ellison is an author, speaker, and trauma-informed writing coach with an Ed.S in Clinical Mental Health Counseling and a background in mindfulness. She regularly presents and teaches courses on the use of mindfulness in writing, writing about trauma, the book proposal, and all things memoir. A regular contributor to the Jane Friedman blog, her essays and short stories have appeared in HuffPost, Hippocampus Literary Magazine, the New Guard Review, Kenyon Review Online, and Brevity, among others.   Connect with Lisa: Website: https://lisacooperellison.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lisacooperellison/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lisacooperellison/ Threads: https://www.threads.net/@lisacooperellison LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lisa-ellison-b5483840/   — About Ronit Subscribe to Ronit's Memoir Substack: https://substack.com/@ronitplank?utm_source=profile-page Ronit’s writing has appeared in The Atlantic, The Rumpus, The New York Times, The Iowa Review, Hippocampus, The Washington Post, Writer’s Digest, American Literary Review, and elsewhere. Her memoir WHEN SHE COMES BACK about the loss of her mother to the guru Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh and their eventual reconciliation was named Finalist in the 2021 Housatonic Awards Awards, the 2021 Indie Excellence Awards, and was a 2021 Book Riot Best True Crime Book. Her short story collection HOME IS A MADE-UP PLACE won Hidden River Arts’ 2020 Eludia Award and the 2023 Page Turner Awards for Short Stories. She earned an MFA in Nonfiction Writing at Pacific University, is Creative Nonfiction Editor at The Citron Review, and lives in Seattle with her family where she teaches memoir workshops and is working on her next book. More about Ronit: https://ronitplank.com   Sign up for monthly podcast and writing updates: https://bit.ly/33nyTKd   Follow Ronit: https://www.instagram.com/ronitplank/ https://twitter.com/RonitPlank https://www.facebook.com/RonitPlank   Background photo credit: Photo by Patrick Tomasso on Unsplash Headshot photo credit: Sarah Anne Photography Theme music: Isaac Joel, Dead Moll’s Fingers

2 Apr 202450min

Paula Ramón joins Let’s Talk Memoir for a conversation about pivoting from journalism to memoir to tell the story of Venezuela’s collapse, understanding the history of her country before and after Chavez through her mother’s life, guilt, the physical and emotional losses she and her family have faced, the concept of democracy, when there’s no future in your country, emotional warfare and shrinking resources, the toll of migration on the body, and her memoir Motherland.   Also in this episode:  -working with translators -putting human faces to the facts -memoir as legacy   Books mentioned in this episode: La plaça del Diamant /The Time of the Doves by Mercè Rodoreda   Paula Ramón is a Venezuelan journalist who has lived and worked in China, the United States, Brazil, and Uruguay. She is currently a correspondent for Agence France-Presse, based in Los Angeles. She has written and reported for the New York Times, National Geographic, Columbia Journalism Review, and Piauí magazine, among other outlets.   Connect with Paula: X: https://twitter.com/paulacramon Motherland: https://www.amazon.com/Motherland-Memoir-Paula-Ram%C3%B3n/dp/1542036909/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3J0JIIKVB05O&keywords=motherland+by+paula+ramon&qid=1689103668&sprefix=motherland+by+paula+ramon%2Caps%2C183&sr=8-1 — Ronit’s writing has appeared in The Atlantic, The Rumpus, The New York Times, The Iowa Review, Hippocampus, The Washington Post, Writer’s Digest, American Literary Review, and elsewhere. Her memoir WHEN SHE COMES BACK about the loss of her mother to the guru Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh and their eventual reconciliation was named Finalist in the 2021 Housatonic Awards Awards, the 2021 Indie Excellence Awards, and was a 2021 Book Riot Best True Crime Book. Her short story collection HOME IS A MADE-UP PLACE won Hidden River Arts’ 2020 Eludia Award and the 2023 Page Turner Awards for Short Stories. She earned an MFA in Nonfiction Writing at Pacific University, is Creative Nonfiction Editor at The Citron Review, and lives in Seattle with her family where she teaches memoir workshops and is working on her next book. More about Ronit: https://ronitplank.com   Sign up for monthly podcast and writing updates: https://bit.ly/33nyTKd   Follow Ronit: https://www.instagram.com/ronitplank/ https://twitter.com/RonitPlank https://www.facebook.com/RonitPlank   Background photo credit: Photo by Patrick Tomasso on Unsplash Headshot photo credit: Sarah Anne Photography Theme music: Isaac Joel, Dead Moll’s Fingers

26 Mars 202445min

Ellen Weir Casey joins Let’s Talk Memoir for a conversation about infertility and becoming the mother of one of the world’s first IVF babies in the earliest days of assisted reproductive technology, the role guilt plays in women’s lives, being part of medical and women’s history, forgiving ourselves, reproductive freedom, and her memoir Unstoppable: Forging The Path To Motherhood In The Early Days Of IVF.   Also mentioned in this episode: -The Aspen Institute -giving our work time to settle -researching back in the days of microfiche   Books mentioned in this episode: The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks by Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls Wild Game by Adrienne Brodeuer Educated by Tara Westover Mad Man in the Woods by Jamie Gehring Ellen Weir Casey is the mother of one of the world's first IVF babies. Her memoir, Unstoppable:Forging The Path To Motherhood In The Early Days Of IVF, is a best seller and Zibby Book Award finalist. She speaks nationally and internationally about her unique experience in the earliest days of assisted reproductive technology.  Ellen has graduate and undergraduate degrees from Colorado College. She studied memoir writing at the Aspen Institute Summer Words program. Ellen lives in the shadow of Pike's Peak, in the foothills of Colorado Springs.   Connect with Ellen: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ellen2956 Get Ellen’s Book: https://www.amazon.com/Unstoppable-Forging-Path-Motherhood-Early/dp/1632994976 — Ronit’s writing has appeared in The Atlantic, The Rumpus, The New York Times, The Iowa Review, Hippocampus, The Washington Post, Writer’s Digest, American Literary Review, and elsewhere. Her memoir WHEN SHE COMES BACK about the loss of her mother to the guru Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh and their eventual reconciliation was named Finalist in the 2021 Housatonic Awards Awards, the 2021 Indie Excellence Awards, and was a 2021 Book Riot Best True Crime Book. Her short story collection HOME IS A MADE-UP PLACE won Hidden River Arts’ 2020 Eludia Award and the 2023 Page Turner Awards for Short Stories. She earned an MFA in Nonfiction Writing at Pacific University, is Creative Nonfiction Editor at The Citron Review, and lives in Seattle with her family where she teaches memoir workshops and is working on her next book. More about Ronit: https://ronitplank.com   Sign up for monthly podcast and writing updates: https://bit.ly/33nyTKd   Follow Ronit: https://www.instagram.com/ronitplank/ https://twitter.com/RonitPlank https://www.facebook.com/RonitPlank   Background photo credit: Photo by Patrick Tomasso on Unsplash Headshot photo credit: Sarah Anne Photography Theme music: Isaac Joel, Dead Moll’s Fingers

21 Mars 202445min

Karen DeBonis joins Let’s Talk Memoir for a conversation about the obstacles and medical gaslighting she faced trying to uncover what ailed her son, postpartum depression, writing about difficult motherhoods, learning how to deal with conflict, sharing our pages with partners, promoting our work, a happy social media story, how she overcome her people pleasing ways to become a warrior mom and her new memoir Growth: A Mother, Her Son, and the Brain Tumor They Survived.   Also in this episode: -Munchausen by Proxy -marketing angles and memoir -highlighting our patterns in memoir   Books mentioned in this episode: Raising a Rare Girl by Heather Lanier Motherhood Exaggerated by Judith Hannan The Opposite of Certainty by Janine Urbaniak Reid   Karen DeBonis writes about motherhood, people-pleasing, and personal growth, inspired by the experience of raising her son, Matthew. Her debut memoir Growth: A Mother, Her Son, and the Brain Tumor They Survived was released by Apprentice House Press in May 2023. Karen’s work has appeared in The New York Times, Huff Post, Today.com, Newsweek.com, and others. A happy empty-nester, Karen lives in upstate New York with her husband of forty years.    Connect with Karen: Website: www.karendebonis.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/karen.debonis.3 Twitter: https://twitter.com/KarenDeBonis IG: https://www.instagram.com/karendeboniswriter/ Linked In: https://www.linkedin.com/in/karendebonis/ Amazon purchase link: https://www.amazon.com/Growth-Mother-Brain-Tumor-Survived/dp/1627204350/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1672427791&sr=8-1 Bookshop purchase link: https://bookshop.org/p/books/growth-a-mother-her-son-and-the-brain-tumor-they-survived-karen-debonis/19468474?ean=9781627204354 — Ronit’s writing has appeared in The Atlantic, The Rumpus, The New York Times, The Iowa Review, Hippocampus, The Washington Post, Writer’s Digest, American Literary Review, and elsewhere. Her memoir WHEN SHE COMES BACK about the loss of her mother to the guru Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh and their eventual reconciliation was named Finalist in the 2021 Housatonic Awards Awards, the 2021 Indie Excellence Awards, and was a 2021 Book Riot Best True Crime Book. Her short story collection HOME IS A MADE-UP PLACE won Hidden River Arts’ 2020 Eludia Award and the 2023 Page Turner Awards for Short Stories. She earned an MFA in Nonfiction Writing at Pacific University, is Creative Nonfiction Editor at The Citron Review, and lives in Seattle with her family where she teaches memoir workshops and is working on her next book. More about Ronit: https://ronitplank.com   Sign up for monthly podcast and writing updates: https://bit.ly/33nyTKd   Follow Ronit: https://www.instagram.com/ronitplank/ https://twitter.com/RonitPlank https://www.facebook.com/RonitPlank   Background photo credit: Photo by Patrick Tomasso on Unsplash Headshot photo credit: Sarah Anne Photography Theme music: Isaac Joel, Dead Moll’s Fingers

19 Mars 202445min