696: Googliearchs

In this episode of Grumpy Old Geeks, we’re serving up a buffet of dystopia with a side of snark. First, Kuwait has finally realized crypto bros are an energy drain, not a feature. Celsius Network’s founder gets 12 years for running a “safe investment” Ponzi scheme. And in Lopez v. Apple, we find yet another reason to question Cupertino’s moral compass.

Then it’s time for a trip through the tech trash fire. DoorDash gobbles up Deliveroo, proving there’s no such thing as too many overpriced salads. Google wants your kids to befriend Gemini—because what could go wrong giving tweens supervised AI access? Tesla’s “Robotaxi” trademark gets the boot for being as generic as Elon’s pickup lines. Meanwhile, Grok strips in public, deepfake porn sites get the axe, and dating app “Raw” rawdogs user data like it’s the early 2000s internet. We also hit peak Black Mirror with brain-typed tweets, AI-resurrected relatives, and crypto kidnappers playing real-life GTA.

On Media Candy, the streaming overlords dump trailers like Halloween candy. Squid Game is back to traumatize you, Star Trek: Lower Decks keeps boldly going where no animated series should, and The Old Guard 2 teases a Theron-vs-Thurman sword fight. Plus, Apple’s UX team found the “enhance” button, Netflix wants to be helpful (lol), and Google dreams of becoming a Hollywood darling. Over in Apps & Doodads, Apple wants to stagger iPhone drops, Disney sells you a $3,000 droid with zero sass, and Smart Flowerpots are now a thing because apparently, you can’t be trusted to water your plant.

And finally, it’s time for The Dark Side with Dave, where Bittner brings us malware, click tracks, fake vocals, and the shocking truth about KISS’s lipsync disaster in Antwerp. We also dip into ILM’s jaw-dropping legacy, Star Wars’ shady back alleys, and a new Disneyland in Abu Dhabi, because nothing says “happiest place on Earth” like 120°F desert heat. All this and more, right here on your favorite snark-fueled ragecast

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Show notes at https://gog.show/696

FOLLOW UP

Kuwait cracks down on crypto miners to cut down on electricity usage

Founder of crypto platform Celsius Network is sentenced to 12 years in prison

Lopez v. Apple Inc.

IN THE NEWS

DoorDash is buying British rival Deliveroo for $3.9 billion

Shrinking Website Run By Nazi Psychopath Wants to Improve Its Image

Tesla 'Robotaxi' trademark refused for being too generic

Kids under 13 will soon get supervised access to Google Gemini

People Are Losing Loved Ones to AI-Fueled Spiritual Fantasies

Nonverbal Neuralink Patient Is Using Brain Implant and Grok to Generate Replies

Elon Musk's Grok AI Will 'Remove Her Clothes' In Public, On X

Dating App ‘Raw’ Accidentally Rawdogs Users’ Location Data, Personal Info

GlobalX, Airline for Trump’s Deportations, Hacked

U.S. pushes nations facing tariffs to approve Musk’s Starlink, cables show

Leading deepfake porn site is shut down for good

Lehigh County's $500 Million Pension Fund Halts Tesla Investments

NOAA Warns of Attacks on Radar Systems by Militia That Thinks They Are ‘Weather Weapons’

Family Uses AI To Revive Dead Brother For Impact Statement in Killer’s Trial

We have reached the “severed fingers and abductions” stage of the crypto revolution

MEDIA CANDY

Star Trek: Lower Decks

Spring Baking Championship

Unveiling Our Innovative New TV Experience Featuring Enhanced Design, Responsive Recommendations and a New Way to Search

Apple renews Seth Rogen’s Hollywood satire 'The Studio' for season two ahead of finale

The End Is Here in the First Trailer for Squid Game 3

The Long Walk (2025) Official Trailer

The Third Crisis dawns in Foundation S3 teaser

New Old Guard 2 Trailer Sees Charlize Theron Cross Swords With Uma Thurman

The best travel show on Apple TV+ just made its triumphant return

Poker Face Season 2

Google is reportedly getting back into film and TV with a tech-friendly production initiative

Golden Globes Adding Best Podcast Category Beginning In 2026

APPS & DOODADS

Apple reportedly wants to split up the iPhone’s release schedule

Apple to add AI search partners to Safari as Google usage falls

Patreon update lets U.S. fans bypass Apple’s 30% fee in iOS app, more changes coming

Apps like Kindle are already taking advantage of court-mandated iOS App Store change

Disney’s Got a Star Wars Droid to Sell You…for $3,000

Smart Flowerpots,Smart Pet Planter,Ai Planter,Intelligent Flowerpots,Multiple Expressions,7 Smart Sensors, and Ai Chips Make Raising Plants Easy and Fun for Living Room,Plant-Free,Yellow

Trump administration plans to shutter money-saving Energy Star program

THE DARK SIDE WITH DAVE

Dave Bittner

The CyberWire

Hacking Humans

Caveat

Control Loop

Only Malware in the Building

Industrial Light & Magic: Into the Digital Realm

Industrial Light & Magic: The Art of Special Effects

Industrial Light & Magic: 50 Years of Innovation

Digital Dreams: The Work of the Sony Design Center

Andor

Star Wars: Tales of the Underworld

Disney Just Announced a Brand New Theme Park: Disneyland Abu Dhabi

KISS : Total Lip Sync Fail in Antwerp Belgium 6 June 2022

KISS In Ear Monitor Feed with Click Track, Cues and FAKE VOCALS The Smoking Gun Eddie Trunk

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