How to Stop Self-Sabotaging Your Happiness

How to Stop Self-Sabotaging Your Happiness

In this solo episode of The Crazy Ex-Wives Club, Erica takes you deep into the messy middle of healing—the part we don’t always talk about, but definitely all feel. Recorded in real-time while navigating some serious emotional rewiring, this one’s raw, real, and wildly relatable.


Erica shares her personal journey through a weekend of big feelings, high-stakes hope, and the nervous system freakouts that come with wanting something so badly it terrifies you. She breaks down the sneaky ways fear disguises itself as excitement, why our bodies shut us down when we’re actually safe, and how to rewire those internal red flags into green lights again.


If you’ve ever felt scared to be excited about something good—because disappointment has burned you before—this episode is your lifeline. From breathwork to grounding, manifestation to present-moment magic, Erica offers tools you can use right now to shift from anxious to aligned.


🔑 Key Themes & Takeaways:

  • Fear vs. Excitement – Why your nervous system might be screaming “danger” when your heart is whispering “yes.”
  • The Safety Switch – Learn how to trick your brain into realizing you’re safe to dream again.
  • Reclaim the Present – Future tripping will steal your joy. Here's how to anchor into now.
  • Toolbox Time – From breathwork to birds to Beauty and the Beast singalongs—yes, really—Erica shares the tools that work.
    • The 51% Rule – You don’t need to be perfect. You just need to believe a little more in what’s possible than in what could go wrong.


  • We talk about:

    • 00:00 Introduction
    • 01:44 Understanding Fear and Excitement
    • 02:23 The Impact of Divorce and Trauma
    • 03:06 Navigating High Stakes and Disappointment
    • 04:24 The Protective Mechanism of the Nervous System
    • 13:03 Tools for Overcoming Fear and Anxiety
    • 18:21 Staying in the Present Moment
    • 24:23 Overcoming Relationship Anxiety
    • 28:17 Tools for Staying Present
    • 31:18 Using Your Five Senses
    • 33:54 Grounding Techniques and Essential Oils
    • 37:09 Guided Meditation and Other Practices
    • 39:23 Maintaining Momentum and Overcoming Fear
    • 42:15 Final Thoughts and Encouragement


  • The Club: A Divorce Community to Help you Get Clear, Get Grounded and Move Forward.

    Psst… Have you heard? There is a new online space for you to get the support and guidance you need on your divorce journey. The Club is your space to heal, grow and get clear on what you want - whether you are unhappily married or taking those first steps through divorce. The Club offers on-demand programs, monthly live connection calls and a quarterly curated healing kit. Everything The Club offers helps you get clear and get confident on what you want in your next chapter.


    Put your name on the VIP list to be the first invited to join. Space is limited, so grab your invite early. https://www.thecrazyexwivesclub.com/theclubwaitlist


    The Other F Word:

    Struggling to decide what your next step is? Decision fatigue is a real thing and it is made 1000x worse when fear has its hold on your heart. If you find yourself in the place of knowing you need to make a change but unable to actually commit to it, join me for this FREE online webinar about what is holding you hostage from making a decision about your relationship—and more importantly, how to break free.


    Grab your seat today and find your way forward.

    https://www.thecrazyexwivesclub.com/fear


    Looking for More Support? Let’s Connect

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