Corrine and Neil Stokoe: Finding Healing From Pornography Addiction

Mint Arrow is a well-known fashion deals blog and brand. Husband and wife duo, Neil and Corrine Stokoe, are the power couple behind the operation. But in a social media world that frequently presents the ideal as day-to-day reality, the couple recently opened up about an underlying struggle that couldn't be seen in their smiling faces: a battle against pornography addiction.

"I had to get to know Jesus in a way that I wouldn't know Him if I hadn't gone through the steps and if I didn't feel so desperate that I really was saying, 'I will do anything to overcome this and to feel better and to find peace.'" -Corrine Stokoe

Show Notes:

1:40- First Contact With Pornography/Talking With Kids About Pornography

7:21- Telling Corrine

20:10- Intimacy Vs. Lust

25:36- ARP: AA Meets The Gospel

37:18- Why Do You Need A Sponsor?

42:06- Why Do the 12 Steps as the Spouse of an Addict?

46:27- Surrendering to the Savior Through the 12 Steps

49:08- Grateful for Addiction

52:46- A Message to Those Struggling With Addiction Now

54:18- A Message to The Spouse of an Addict

56:55- What Does It Mean To You To Be All In the Gospel of Jesus Christ?

Listen to the Mint Arrow Messages episode featuring Kristen Jenson, the author of "Good Pictures, Bad Pictures" by clicking here.

Purchase "Good Pictures, Bad Pictures," here.

Watch: What Should I Do When I See Pornography? for families

Watch: The Church's new series about combating pornography
Watch: Videos specifically for parents
Watch: Videos specifically for spouses of pornography users

Read Neil and Corrine's Real Life Love Story on Mint Arrow.

Read Part Two of Neil and Corrine's Real Life Love Story.

Listen to their story on Mint Arrow Messages.
Listen to Part Two of Neil and Corinne's podcast episode about their experience.

An introduction to Mandi and Court Gubler's story from the Deseret News.

Listen to Corrine's recent interview with Mandi Gubler on Mint Arrow Messages.

"We don't have to take things so personally. We take things to heart that we have no business taking to heart. For instance, saying "If you loved me you wouldn't drink" to an alcoholic makes as much sense as saying "If you loved me, you wouldn't cough" to someone who has pneumonia. Pneumonia victims will cough until they get appropriate treatment for their illness. Alcoholics will drink until they get the same. When people with a compulsive disorder do whatever it is they are compelled to do, they are not saying they don't love you—they are saying they don't love themselves."-Melody Beattie in "Codependent No More"

Visit the Church's "Addressing Pornography" website.

"We need to be more patient with the process. We need to worry less about the speed at which we are moving and more about the direction we are going. We will not fully realize our divine potential in this life. And while we need to make wise use of our time in our mortal existence, we should remember that God does not deal with time in the same way we do. In fact, time as we understand it may not bind Him at all. As Alma noted, 'Time only is measured unto men.' Because speed is a measure of distance over time, if time becomes less relevant, so does speed. Thus, in eternal things, such as our ongoing progress in becoming like God, direction is more important than speed. In the long run, the direction we are headed matters much more than the rate at which we are moving." Kevin Worthen, "Knowing Who You Are."

Read Elder Jeffrey R. Holland's "Cast Not Away Therefore Your Confidence."

Of all the illustrations of faith in the Lord, few stories are more powerful than that told of the pioneer who years later stood to defend the decision of the Martin Handcart Company to start for the Salt Lake Valley late in the year of 1856. He had been one of the nearly 3,000 Saints who walked from Iowa and Nebraska to Utah between 1856 and 1860 in one of 10 companies pushing and pulling handcarts loaded with their belongings.
In a Sunday School class there was sharp criticism of the ill-fated Martin and Willie Handcart Companies, which met with tragedy because of their late start on the trek to the Salt Lake Valley.
An elderly man arose and said: "I ask you to stop this criticism. You are discussing a matter you know nothing about. Cold historic facts … give no proper interpretation of the questions involved. Mistake to send the Handcart Company out so late in the season? Yes. But I was in that company and my wife … too. We suffered beyond anything you can imagine and many died of exposure and starvation, but … we became acquainted with [God] in our extrem[i]ties.
"I have pulled my handcart when I was so weak and weary from illness and lack of food that I could hardly put one foot ahead of the other. I have looked ahead and seen a patch of sand or a hill slope and I have said, I can go that far and there I must give up, for I cannot pull the load through it. … I have gone on to that sand and when I reached it, the cart began pushing me. I have looked back many times to see who was pushing my cart, but my eyes saw no one. I knew then that the angels of God were there.
"Was I sorry that I chose to come by handcart? No. Neither then nor any minute of my life since. The price we paid to become acquainted with God was a privilege to pay, and I am thankful that I was privileged to come in the Martin Handcart Company" (as quoted in David O. McKay, "Pioneer Women," The Relief Society Magazine, Jan. 1948, 8). Shared in the January 1997 Ensign.

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