The Science of Repair in Relationships

When we come to the seemingly inevitable place in our marriage where the spark is just gone, is there a possibility of revitalizing eroticism and passion back into the relationship?ABSOLUTELY. There’s a crazy myth out there that eroticism dies over time – like it’s something that can’t be controlled. But the truth is, you have a choice to rekindle that sexual desire and excitement.The key to reviving eroticism lies in coming alive within yourself and letting go of resentment, anxieties, insecurities, and self-doubt. These things are often overlooked as a source for a lost spark but will often be the root of disconnection in the bedroom.But by prioritizing great sex and being open to creativity and imagination, couples can experience a higher level of satisfaction and a thriving relationship. Tune in to get inspired about your next sexual encounter with your spouse.Resources Mentioned In This Episode:Passionate Marriage by Dr. David Schnarch - https://a.co/d/4CPF8UkOrgasm Study - https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28213723/Women Masturbation Study - https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/0092623X.2011.628440The Hite Report: A National Study of Female Sexuality - https://a.co/d/4ZlBFOQ MYM Resources:8 Pillars Of An Exceptional Marriage - ​​https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/8-pillarsBecome FREE of resentment ➡️ https://forgive.masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Connect with Robert and Sharla Snow:Website: https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/Facebook - https://facebook.com/masteryourmarriageTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriage

27 Dec 202330min

If you’ve pressed play on this episode today because you’re struggling with sex in your marriage in some form, please know, you’re not alone. A lot of people and a lot of couples experience difficulties with sex. The good news is you’re here, and this episode is going to help you overcome a lot of the mental barriers that can actually be creating this challenge.“Many of the words or thoughts we use come from societal myths. But as these ideas are repeated over and over in the psyche, they will determine whether sex becomes the source of joy and mutual pleasure, or whether they become a source of disappointment and resentment.” - Robert SnowResources for an improved sexual experience:The Vagina Bible - https://a.co/d/h5ACDIxCome As You Are: Revised and Updated - https://a.co/d/44fwQIAMYM Resources:8 Pillars Of An Exceptional Marriage - ​​https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/8-pillarsBecome FREE of resentment ➡️ https://forgive.masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Connect with Robert and Sharla Snow:Website: https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/Facebook - https://facebook.com/masteryourmarriageTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriag

20 Dec 202331min

Break free from resentment today ➡️ https://forgive.masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/So you’ve heard about the 5 love languages. But have you heard about meta-emotions?Simply put, meta-emotion is how we feel about our feelings.And mismatching meta-emotions (how you feel about emotions vs how your partner feels about emotions) is probably the single most common reason couples present for counseling. Like love languages, when your partner speaks a different emotional language than you, it can cause a lot of problems in the relationship and create disconnection. It tends to lead to comments and thoughts like, “You never listen to me,” or, “They just don’t get me.”A common mismatch of meta-emotions represents this way: one person is expressive about their emotions and the other might be more dismissive, just trying to repress any negativity.Tune in to better understand where you lie on this spectrum of meta-emotion and how to coexist in these differences.“Differing emotional philosophies could be at the root of many of your relationship issues.” - SharlaMYM Resources:8 Pillars Of An Exceptional Marriage - ​​https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/8-pillarsLet this $20 Forgiveness course transform your marriage ➡️ https://forgive.masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Connect with Robert and Sharla Snow:Website: https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/Facebook - https://facebook.com/masteryourmarriageTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriage

13 Dec 202327min

In this powerful episode, Antonio Neves sits down with Robert and Sharla Snow to discuss the secrets to relationship success. Some of the key topics covered include:Marriage phases and how to grow through themRed flags like contempt, complacency, and ignoring bids for connection Practical ways to put your spouse first, like daily rituals and prioritizing quality timeDeveloping marital fitness with stress-reducing conversations and acts of serviceThe importance of managing conflict positively and growing togetherSpeaking words of appreciation daily to counteract the toxicity of contemptIf you're looking to strengthen your relationship, tune into this must-listen episode for evidence-based insights and action steps you can start applying today.Resources Mentioned In This Episode:Gottman Research - https://www.gottman.com/about/research/ MYM Resources:8 Pillars Of An Exceptional Marriage - ​​https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/8-pillarsBecome FREE of resentment ➡️ https://forgive.masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Connect with Antonio Neves:Website - https://theantonioneves.com/ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/theantonioneves/ Connect with Robert and Sharla Snow:Website: https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/Facebook - https://facebook.com/masteryourmarriageTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriage

6 Dec 202348min

💔Don’t let resentment fester - overcome it with these tools: https://forgive.masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/ Conflict is inevitable. And if we can’t avoid it, what should we do instead? Shall we get in the fetal position and rock ourselves to sleep? Pretend conflict doesn't exist?Obviously not, guys. This is called Master Your Marriage, not Mess Up Your Marriage. So if we know that conflict is inevitable, we know there’s a certain level of acceptance that we need to grow in. But what else can we do to make sure that the conflict doesn’t become ‘the end’? Well, we practice repair.Taking responsibility for your role in conflict is going to be key. But then you’re also going to want to practice some crucial friendship principles that are going to help lighten the mood and rebuild connection.Tune in to learn how to repair the ruptures in your relationship.In this Episode:- Why relationships are a system set up for failure- Why and how failure is the solution-The ability to repair is the key for success in a relationship- Asking your partner about offenses- The secret weapon of repair- How to remain good friendsAnd more!Resources Mentioned In This Episode:The Science of Trust: https://a.co/d/d9zT2Mu Mother/child study: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2654842/How to Work Through a Past Fight - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/how-to-work-through-a-past-fight/id1669788601?i=1000611554391 or on YouTube: https://youtu.be/B8th4hCRtTk?si=7xpmfd-XuDD8olHk MYM Resources:8 Pillars Of An Exceptional Marriage - ​​https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/8-pillarsBecome FREE of resentment ➡️ https://forgive.masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Connect with Robert and Sharla Snow:Website: https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/Facebook - https://facebook.com/masteryourmarriageTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriage

29 Nov 202325min

“Needing may feel like wanting, but it comes from the worst in us. It comes from a poorly developed sense of self, where we need our partner to soothe our anxiety, boost our ego, and constantly agree with us.” - SharlaOuch, that hurts, doesn’t it? We all know that being called “needy” comes with a negative connotation. But you’re not needy, right? You’re just expressing your preferences and your desires…Well, let’s see how many times we’ve probably been guilty of turning our wants into a NEED…Have you ever:Stayed angry and miserable so you can keep your partner miserable?People-pleased yourself into resentment when you’re not getting praised for your deeds?Required tons of praise and compliments to feel loved?Withheld doing something until your partner did their part?Don’t worry, it’s in all of us. We all want to be wanted. But when we don’t get what we want, it can become a slippery slope for Need to come bursting in making demands.The good news is, there’s a way to overcome the neediness and mature into loving relationships that honor both individuals involved. Tune in to learn how.“This is also why the level of intimacy you will have in your relationship WILL be directly correlated to how much discomfort you can handle.” - Robert SnowIn this Episode:- Needing vs. Wanting- Examples of neediness- How Wanting differs from Needing- How to know if you’re wanting or needing- Disillusionment — really knowing your partner- Love is about choosing- How to shift your needs to wants and choosingResources Mentioned In This Episode:Everything isn’t Terrible by Dr. Kathleen Smith https://a.co/d/ilXvpfg MYM Resources:8 Pillars Of An Exceptional Marriage - ​​https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/8-pillarsBecome FREE of resentment ➡️ https://forgive.masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Connect with Robert and Sharla Snow:Website: https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/Facebook - https://facebook.com/masteryourmarriageTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriage

22 Nov 202333min

This $20 mini-course can help you overcome resentment ➡️ https://forgive.masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Robert’s back on this episode of the Master Your Marriage Podcast, and together, he and Sharla are going to help you change how you think about your relationship.We often don’t give thoughts the credit they deserve. But our thoughts have so much power over the world around us. Including our relationships. Are your thoughts about your partner based on resentment? Are they even true? Are they mostly positive or mostly negative?If you haven’t stopped to assess your own thoughts recently, this episode is going to shine some light on areas where maybe you are subconsciously affecting your relationship with the wrong thoughts.“We think ourselves into more problems than we realize.” - SharlaIn this Episode:- Should she stay with him?- How thoughts work and impact our actions- Fixed mindset vs. Growth mindset- Absolute red flags of resentment- Dealing with unwanted thoughtsMYM Resources:8 Pillars Of An Exceptional Marriage - ​​https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/8-pillarsConnect with Robert and Sharla Snow:Website: https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/Facebook - https://facebook.com/masteryourmarriageTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriage

15 Nov 202323min

This $20 mini-course can help you overcome resentment ➡️ https://forgive.masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/ Realizing that the partner you chose to be married to will likely never give you the life you always envisioned for yourself can be a pretty terrifying reality…So, how do you hold onto your dignity and self-respect when it becomes clear that your partner can’t give you what you want?When this is the case, is there even a chance your relationship can make it without being miserable for the rest of your lives?Well, the answer is yes. But it’s going to take work.It comes down to learning how to differentiate. And that’s YOU work. Not them.So what is differentiation exactly? It’s ALLOWING someone to really matter to you, really know you, and then being able to regulate your sense of self, when that person doesn’t give you the validation you want.And it’s extremely difficult work.Because, let’s be honest, most of us can all be regulated and mature when we’re getting exactly what we want. But what happens when we’re not? That is when you really get to see where you need to grow. And this is likely where your marriage is requiring you to step up. So, tune in to learn how to practice differentiation.“I think when we recognize that we are fallible, it is a little easier to accept that other people are fallible, too.” - SharlaIn this Episode:- How to move forward in marital crisis- What is Differentiation?- What does it mean to be Invalidated?- How divorce and separation reveal who we are- Tips for working on differentiationAnd more!MYM Resources:8 Pillars Of An Exceptional Marriage - ​​https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/8-pillarsConnect with Robert and Sharla Snow:Website: https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/Facebook - https://facebook.com/masteryourmarriageTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriage

8 Nov 202325min