Make Your Damn Bed20 Nov 2025

1616 || how to do hard things

The brain’s main goal is to protect us, so when we ask it to do anything new (particularly if you are neurodivergent) it signals to the brain that there may be danger lurking - so it refuses to do it, because it believes that is what keeps us safe. Many brains looks at all new tasks like a hot stove. So how do we manage this? According to kdimerc we can:

Remove all unnecessary stoves. Look at the task objectively and ask yourself, “is this task really necessary or important?” If it’s not - take it off the burner completely, for now.
Turn off the stove, if you are able to! This will be different for everyone, but it’s typically the things I suggest on this podcast to help you get motivated. Things like body doubling, brain hacks, pairing actions with other triggers, like this podcast, or songs, therapy and medication may help to turn off, or at least, turn down the heat on these stoves.
Get really good at touching hot stoves. Like we have been discussing recently on the podcast, building your tolerance for distress is seemingly less and less optional at this point. But unfortunately there will be times where you can’t ignore a task, and you can’t make it less daunting, so you just have to power through the dread and do it anyway.

While you may not be able to control your motivation to do a daunting task, you can control your mindset around it. You can come to accept the dread as part of the process.

Watch Kdimerc’s video on the "Hot Stove Conundrum"

Read Beautiful Chaos’ blog post on "ADHD + The Hot Stovetop"

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The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

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Avsnitt(1923)

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