SS 262: Why We Play With Others

SS 262: Why We Play With Others

When people consider exploring non-monogamy, we tell them to picture a pretty good but occasionally difficult relationship (ie, every relationship) and then picture it expanding exponentially because you've added more people. Eventually becoming a tesseract of interlocking and interconnected parts. Each of those parts, believe it or not, have a mind of their own. We've all been in moments where it seems insurmountable, where we acknowledge that this whole damned thing is just too hard and consider the days of monogamous yore. We discuss what pushes us to the edge, and what keeps us going, because playing with and loving others feels so fucking right.

Dylan starts the discussion with a personal update; Tonia feels isolated, not having people she feels she can talk to openly even when she's surrounded by friends contributes to that feeling. It's made her consider giving up this whole non-monogamy thing and it's left Dylan feeling useless since there's not a lot that Dylan can do to directly help. Dylan's feels guilt over some recent success and he hates the feeling that he's leaving her bind.

Cooper mentions that, acknowledging the negative feedback loop Tonia's in, that multiple partners bring a particular joy that we all seek, sexually and emotionally, Dylan explanabrags a bit but then admits that his #1 attraction to this lifestyle is that he no longer has to feel along, because he's part of this exclusive (but very inclusive) club. Ginger seals the point by stating that the relationship choices we make enrich our lives through the people we connect with, and that we bring that energy back to the relationships with those we've built a life with.

Ginger recommends a book, Open Marriage: A New Life Style for Couples, by Nena O'Neill.

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We have TEN rooms left for our 2016 trip to Desire! Sign up now! November 5th through 12th, 2016!

Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464). Find Cooper on Twitter @CooperSBeckett, Dylan on Twitter @DylanTheThomas, and Ginger on twitter @GingerNTheProf.

You can Cooper's novel about swinging, A Life Less Monogamous, at alifelessmonogamous.com or his memoir My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at mylifeontheswingset.com as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook and if you buy them from his sites, use promo code SWINGSET to save 10%!

Today's podcast featured music by:

Anna Yvette & Laura Brehm - Summer Never Ends

Pegboard Nerds - Try This

Koven - Silence

Cooper S Beckett Ginger Bentham Dylan Thomas

Jaksot(431)

SS 051: Our Evolution II - Anal Sex & Male Bisexuality, Getting Flogged & Opening Up

SS 051: Our Evolution II - Anal Sex & Male Bisexuality, Getting Flogged & Opening Up

We continue our 50th episode reflection of what we're still learning in the lifestyle when Cooper talks about his first one on one mandate and how he feels it pushed him back to a solid 2 on the Kinsey Scale, and Shira discusses an experience of being flogged, beaten, and spanked and how she's in an exploratory mood lately.

28 Loka 20111h 3min

SS 050: Our Evolution - Polyamorous Leanings, Coming Out Sexy

SS 050: Our Evolution - Polyamorous Leanings, Coming Out Sexy

The Swingset crew celebrates their 50th episode with reflections of how we can still learn new things in the lifestyle. We wish Shira a happy Swingset Anniversary. Ginger sends Prof to a sexy party SOLO! Dylan and Tonia explore polyamory and talk to their son about non-monogamy. Ginger yearns to come out as non-monogamous, so we discuss the levels of being out and the normalization of non-monogamy.

23 Loka 20111h

SS 049: Unite The Clans! Coming Together on Swinging Sites & Sex Clubs

SS 049: Unite The Clans! Coming Together on Swinging Sites & Sex Clubs

After Shira horrifies us all by talking about a potential boy-toy's penile subincision, we manage to pull it together and discuss the changing landscape that is online swinger sites and sex clubs along with our special guest Emily from Kasidie.com. We talk a bit about the history of the website, and Emily's role there, but use it as a springboard to discuss the larger themes of how the word is spreading about non-monogamy, and how welcoming and accepting out communities can be

16 Loka 20111h 12min

SS 048: We're Porn Again – Our Fetishes & Home-Made Porn

SS 048: We're Porn Again – Our Fetishes & Home-Made Porn

Dylan asks Shira how polyamorists feel about one night stands. We all talk about the kind of porn that gets us going, then each of us admits to what our guilty pleasure porn is; Cooper feels very bad about his and insists everybody is judging him. After the break we discuss homemade porn, what we've all made, and why swingers take pictures and video

2 Loka 201158min

SS 047: Naked People Doing Dirty Things – Porn All Around Us

SS 047: Naked People Doing Dirty Things – Porn All Around Us

We wonder if pubic hair is making a resurgence, find out that Shira has no tolerance for young people, discuss how we first encountered and discovered porn. We learn that Ginger didn't believe people actually had sex in porn. Shira talks about her past with jealousy over porn. The boys refuse to let Shira go into body negativity mode. Then we all talk about what we've learned from porn

25 Syys 201152min

SS 046: Burning Man '11 Pt 2 – Fear & Loathing on the Playa

SS 046: Burning Man '11 Pt 2 – Fear & Loathing on the Playa

Uh oh! You heard the last podcast and were left wanting for juicy details? The second part of our Burning Man shows reveals exactly what happened between Dylan and the Majestic Woman he met at Burning Man 2011. You will also find out if there was love in the air for Shira B. Katz. Emotions run high in this heartfelt episode recorded just one week after Shira and Dylan return home from the Playa

18 Syys 20111h 9min

SS 045: Burning Man '11 Pt 1 – Shira & Dylan's Excellent Adventure

SS 045: Burning Man '11 Pt 1 – Shira & Dylan's Excellent Adventure

Cooper & Marilyn take a vacation to visit sexy friends from the Great White North. Dylan & Shira B. Katz haven’t been about to shut up about Burning Man and now you finally get to hear why. Listen as the crew discusses what Burning Man has to do with non-monogamy, who they camped with, and what a non-monogamous person can expect on the Playa. Ahoy! Burning Man; land of The Human Car(cass) Wash, The Snack Food Glory Hole, and a place where even the monogamous have an opportunity to open up a little

14 Syys 201150min

SS Special – Dylan Crosses The Rubicon from Swinging to Polyamory at Burning Man 2011

SS Special – Dylan Crosses The Rubicon from Swinging to Polyamory at Burning Man 2011

Dylan here - I visited Burning Man this year, and while I fully expected to have a mind-blowing experience, I found myself wrapped up in the loving arms of another woman, and unable to completely handle some of the consequences of that. I had my first little polyamorous experience, a "playawife" for a few days, but I needed to get some of what was on my mind out. So, this recording is me, on-site, at 8am the day after I decided that what I was doing wasn't going to last. Take a listen, and tell me what you think

8 Syys 201132min

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