On Attachment22 Heinä 2025

#198: What Anxiously Attached People Need to Thrive in a Relationship

When you have an anxious attachment style, it can be hard to know what you actually need to feel secure — especially if past relationships have left you second-guessing yourself or trying to manage your anxiety by suppressing your needs.

In this episode, we’re exploring five key ingredients that help anxiously attached people thrive in relationships. These aren’t about seeking constant reassurance or outsourcing your self-worth — they’re about being in relational environments that support security, growth, and genuine connection.

What we cover in this episode:

How consistency supports nervous system regulation and builds trust over time
The importance of emotional validation in helping you feel understood and connected
Why clear and reliable communication matters more than constant contact
The role of safe conflict in creating long-term security and repair
How having a shared vision helps settle the fear of uncertainty and misalignment

Whether you’re currently dating or in a relationship, this episode will help you get clearer on what’s supportive for you — and how to recognise when your needs are being met versus when you’re stuck in a cycle of over-functioning or hoping for crumbs.

Highlighted Links

Additional Resources

Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here
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Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations
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#248: How to Cope With My Ex Being Happy in a New Relationship (Ask Steph)

In today’s Ask Steph episode, we’re talking about how to cope when your ex seems to have moved on soon after your break-up — and is now in a new relationship that appears to be working.This can be an ...

9 Huhti 11min

#247: Is It Your Anxious Attachment... or the Wrong Relationship?

In today’s episode, we’re unpacking one of the most common (and confusing) questions for people with anxious attachment: is it me, or is there something genuinely not right in this relationship?When y...

7 Huhti 14min

#246: When Is It a Good Idea to Be Friends with an Ex? (Ask Steph)

In today’s Ask Steph episode, we’re exploring a common question: is it ever a good idea to be friends with an ex?While staying connected can sometimes feel comforting after a breakup, it’s not always ...

2 Huhti 8min

#245: Should Anxiously Attached People Just Avoid Avoidants?

In today’s episode, I’m unpacking why I don’t give the common advice for anxiously attached people to simply avoid avoidant partners.While it might seem like a straightforward way to protect yourself ...

31 Maalis 10min

#244: I Healed My Anxious Attachment… So Why Don’t I Want a Relationship Anymore? (Ask Steph)

In this Ask Steph episode, I’m responding to a question I hear more often than you might expect. Someone has done a lot of work on their anxious attachment patterns, they feel more grounded and secure...

26 Maalis 7min

#243: How to Create Healthy, Balanced Relationships with Nedra Glover Tawwab

In this episode, I’m joined by therapist, bestselling author, and boundaries expert Nedra Glover Tawwab for a powerful conversation on what it really means to have healthy dependency in our relationsh...

24 Maalis 43min

#242: When Does Self-Improvement Become Self-Sabotage? (Ask Steph)

In this Ask Steph episode, I respond to a listener question about the fine line between personal growth and the endless pursuit of self-improvement.While healing, reflection, and growth are powerful t...

19 Maalis 6min

#241: How to Date from Self-Worth

Modern dating can be tough. Between apps, ghosting, and the uncertainty that often comes with meeting strangers outside our social circles, the whole process can be seriously activating — and all the ...

17 Maalis 17min