How Not to Ruin Your Relationships | Drs. John & Julie Gottman

How Not to Ruin Your Relationships | Drs. John & Julie Gottman

If you care about your long term health and happiness, the quality of your relationships is an area you should focus on. And the good news here is that love – as it applies to friends, family, and romantic partners – is not a factory setting, but instead a skill. Drs. John and Julie Gottman are the perfect guests to talk about how to cultivate good relationships in your life.


World-renowned for his work on marital stability and divorce prediction, Dr. John Gottman has conducted over 40 years of breakthrough research with thousands of couples. He is the co-founder of The Gottman Institute and Affective Software Inc. as well as author of over 200 published academic articles and author or co-author of more than 40 books, including The New York Times bestseller The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.


Dr. Julie Gottman is the Co-Founder and President of The Gottman Institute and Co-Founder of Affective Software, Inc. A highly respected clinical psychologist and author, she is sought internationally by media and organizations as an expert advisor on marriage, domestic violence, gay and lesbian adoption, same-sex marriage, and parenting issues. She is the co-creator of the immensely popular The Art and Science of Love weekend workshop for couples and she also co-designed the national clinical training program in Gottman Method Couples Therapy.


This episode explores: how to talk (and listen) to your partner in moments of conflict; what to do before you start trying to solve a problem together; why “there’s no such thing as constructive criticism;” the details of John’s research findings, which have allowed him to predict with stunning accuracy whether a couple will get divorced; how the Gottmans themselves do when it comes to operationalizing their findings/advice; how and why betrayal occurs; when a couple should consider separating; the role mindfulness can play in healthy relationships; and the role of humor in relationships.


Content warning: There are a few mentions of sensitive topics, most notably domestic violence, which Julie discusses for a few minutes towards the end of the interview.


Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/john-julie-gottman-418


Jaksot(930)

Leigh Brasington

Leigh Brasington

Leigh Brasington has been practicing meditation for decades and is one of the most prominent American teachers of Jhana meditation. The Jhanas are a set of altered states of consciousness associated with profound amounts of bliss, happiness and ecstasy. Entering Jhana is done through meditating with intense concentration and it's considered a controversial topic by many in the Buddhist world. But can regular people access the Jhanas? And are they even real?

22 Huhti 201655min

Margot Bingham

Margot Bingham

Actress and singer-songwriter Margot Bingham has moved from playing the role of jazz singer Daughter Maitland in HBO's "Boardwalk Empire" to a highly-respected detective in ABC's "The Family," but in working through these complex roles, Bingham said she finds comfort through practicing meditation. Bingham sat down with Dan Harris and talked about her career, how she dealt with the heaviness of her "Boardwalk Empire" role and how she found meditation.

20 Huhti 201648min

Sharon Salzberg

Sharon Salzberg

A towering figure in the meditation world, Sharon Salzberg is part of a small group of people who helped bring meditation over from Asia to the United States. Growing up in New York City, Salzberg had a traumatic childhood and was a sophomore in college when an Asian philosophy class she chose sort of on a whim led her to find a personal and positive connection with Buddhist teachings and practices. Today, she is a meditation teacher, the cofounder of Insight Meditation Society and the author of nine books, including best-sellers "Lovingkindness," "Real Happiness" and "Real Happiness at Work." Salzberg sat down with Dan Harris to talk about her personal history, her meditation practice and her advice to beginners looking to start practicing.

13 Huhti 201655min

George Mumford

George Mumford

George Mumford has taught mindfulness and meditation to some of the greatest athletes of all time: Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant and Shaquille O'Neal, among others. In partnership with the legendary coach Phil Jackson, Mumford taught meditation to the Chicago Bulls and Los Angeles Lakers, and now works with the New York Knicks. He’s also the author of "The Mindful Athlete: The Secret to Pure Performance."

6 Huhti 20161h 17min

David Gelles

David Gelles

The author of "Mindful Work," New York Times reporter David Gelles is a self-described "sporadic meditator." During the day, Gelles says he uses so-called "meditation hacks," such as waiting a beat or two before picking up a ringing phone or practicing walking meditation around the office at work. Earlier this month, he wrote an op-ed for the New York Times Sunday Review called "The Hidden Price of Mindfulness, Inc.," in which he talked about the "mindfulness economy" and the hundreds of products out there, from books to apps to a dairy-free mayonnaise substitute called Mindful Mayo, all carrying a "mindfulness" label.

30 Maalis 201654min

Amy Cuddy

Amy Cuddy

Amy Cuddy has created a bonafide sensation in the world of happiness and well-being. A social psychologist at Harvard Business School and a New York Times best-selling author, Cuddy gave a TED Talk that has been viewed millions of times about how to make yourself look, feel and act more powerful, through something she calls "power poses."

27 Maalis 201655min

Dr. Jay Michaelson

Dr. Jay Michaelson

Dr. Jay Michaelson is a lawyer, a rabbi, a legal/religion columnist for The Daily Beast, an LGBT activist, a professor, and an author of six books. Yet despite his staggering number of day jobs, Michaelson has also found time to intensively practice meditation. In fact, add another job to the resume: He’s also a meditation teacher. And not only does he practice and teach meditation, he says he’s had experiences of enlightenment, or "awakening."

23 Maalis 201652min

Brian Koppelman

Brian Koppelman

The filmmaker and co-creator of the TV show "Billions" talks about his practice of Transcendental Meditation.

18 Maalis 201645min

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