The Feminist Dating Show2 Des 2025

258. From "I'm So Behind" to Main Character Energy: How Abby got promoted, found community, and attracted her first healthy relationship in her mid-30s

In this episode, Abby shares her late bloomer story with so much honesty and clarity. We talk about what it was like to be in her mid-30s, never having been in a serious relationship, carrying a loud "I'm behind" and "I'm weird" narrative, and feeling totally unsure how to talk about her dating history without spiraling.

Abby opens up about moving to a new city, trying to date while feeling embarrassed about her experience, and struggling with the not good enough voice that made her avoid connection. She also shares what shifted for her as she started to process shame, build community, and trust herself enough to take up more space at work, in dating, and in her daily life.

Inside this episode, you'll hear:

how Abby learned to identify and quiet the "I'm weird" and "I'm behind" voice
how belonging helped her stop self-isolating and start connecting
what helped her ask for what she wanted (down to "I need 25% more texts")
how she advocated for herself at work while doing two jobs
how she built friendships, community, and eventually a healthy relationship
what she wishes she could tell her past self, who felt so far behind

This is a powerful example of what can happen when you stop avoiding your desires and start trusting yourself enough to move toward them.

Work with Lily

✨ Join the live training: Stop People-Pleasing and Build a Stupidly Joyful Life live training-- December 3rd: Sign up HERE

✨ Apply to Main Character Life, my 6-month mastermind where Abby did this work — the space to release people-pleasing, build self-trust, advocate for what you want, and go after the life you've been circling for years. Apply HERE

✨ Get my Book — Thank You, More Please, Buy the book + grab your bonus HERE

Follow Lily everywhere:
📺 YouTube Channel
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🌐 Website

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Episoder(340)

285. How to date men when you hate men

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284. Make dating apps optional: A roadmap to attract the right relationship IRL

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283. My story: from people pleasing and settling in dating, to attracting more as the main character (and how you can, too)

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282. "It's scary to want things." How to stop people pleasing and attract what you actually want, with my client Jackie

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281. When is the right time to have sex? (and why you keep asking everyone but yourself)

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8 Sep 26min

280. The Sneaky Ways You're People Pleasing (and How to Stop)

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1 Sep 26min

279. Decide You're the One: How to Get Over the Fear That You're Not Enough

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278. Stop Demoting Yourself to the "Best Friend" Role

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18 Aug 16min