Repairing Self-Abandonment: Anxious Attachment, Healthy Boundaries, and Creating Strong Relationships

Repairing Self-Abandonment: Anxious Attachment, Healthy Boundaries, and Creating Strong Relationships

On today’s episode Dr. Rick and Forrest explore self-abandonment, which occurs when we go against our authentic wants, emotions, and boundaries in order to serve others, meet external expectations, or protect ourselves emotionally. They cover where self-abandonment comes from, the psychological function it serves, and the relationship between self-abandonment and similar concepts like anxious attachment, low self-worth, and external referencing. You’ll learn how to set healthy boundaries, stop neglecting yourself, and become more secure from the inside out. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:00: Common features of self-abandonment 12:30: Facing the fear of our authentic self being seen 16:05: Facing shame and self-criticism 21:00: Self-referencing vs. referencing ourselves in relation to others 33:10: The belief that safety feels more critical than authenticity 40:55: Our relationship to nature, and joining with the defense 50:55: Relationships, openness to change, and bringing parts into awareness 55:20: Cognitive restructuring, and redefining our self-abandoning beliefs 58:50: Recap Forrest is now writing on Substack, check out his work there. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Get your stand on with UPLIFT Desk! Go to UPLIFT Desk.com/BEINGWELL for 5% off your order of one of their fantastic standing desks or office products. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month. Start each day right with IQBAR’s bars, hydration mixes, and mushroom coffees. Just text BEINGWELL to sixty-four thousand (64-000) and get an exclusive offer of 20% off plus free shipping. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Episoder(456)

Attachment, and Cultivating Nonattachment

Attachment, and Cultivating Nonattachment

You might have heard the line “attachment is the root of suffering.” It comes from the Buddha, but you don’t have to be a Buddhist to recognize that becoming overly attached to a particular outcome, p...

13 Jun 20221h 1min

Intimacy, Individuality, and Breaking the Trauma Cycle with Terry Real

Intimacy, Individuality, and Breaking the Trauma Cycle with Terry Real

On one of our favorite episodes of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson are joined by author and therapist Terry Real to talk about how to overcome the myth of toxic individualism, break trauma cyc...

6 Jun 20221h 10min

Overcoming Comparison and Accepting Ordinary with Dr. Ron Siegel

Overcoming Comparison and Accepting Ordinary with Dr. Ron Siegel

When was the last time you went through a day without comparing yourself to anyone? For instance, by comparing your life to someone else’s highlight reel on social media, or being critical of your own...

30 Mai 20221h 3min

Working with Anger: Costs and Benefits, Repression, and the "Empty Boat"

Working with Anger: Costs and Benefits, Repression, and the "Empty Boat"

Anger is one of the most complex, demanding, and difficult emotions we deal with on a regular basis, in part because it has both many costs and many uses. It burdens our bodies, relationships, and the...

23 Mai 202253min

Increasing Self-Awareness: The Key to Personal Growth

Increasing Self-Awareness: The Key to Personal Growth

Self-awareness is both one of the most important skills for a person to have, and one of the most challenging to develop. In this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson explore what it tak...

16 Mai 20221h 6min

Changing Old Patterns, Self-Awareness, and Repairing Family Relationships: Mailbag

Changing Old Patterns, Self-Awareness, and Repairing Family Relationships: Mailbag

Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson open up the mailbag to explore a variety of listener questions. They talk about what causes our brains to become attached to unwanted habits, how to know which of your thou...

9 Mai 202257min

Maximize Your Motivation: Dopamine, Discipline, and Accepting Our Nature

Maximize Your Motivation: Dopamine, Discipline, and Accepting Our Nature

We all have things we want to accomplish in life, but having goals or knowing we should be doing something is often not nearly enough to get us to actually sustain our efforts in getting where we want...

2 Mai 20221h 3min

Preventing Secondary Trauma and Compassion Fatigue with Laura van Dernoot Lipsky

Preventing Secondary Trauma and Compassion Fatigue with Laura van Dernoot Lipsky

With so much suffering going on in the world that’s worthy of our compassion and engagement, it’s easy to become overwhelmed by it even as we have the desire to remain engaged. Secondary traumatic str...

25 Apr 202252min

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