Enneagram and Marriage10 Mar 2025

The Space Between Us: Why Decentralizing Your Partner Creates Healthier Love

What happens when we make our partners the center of our emotional universe? In this insightful episode with Christa walking us through the concept of decentralization, we explore the delicate art of "decentralizing" your partner—a powerful practice that counterintuitively strengthens intimate connections. Through the lens of marriage theory, including but not limited to the Enneagram, we discover how constant emotional monitoring can suffocate even the most loving relationships. Learn to recognize signs you've over-centralized your partner, understand how your Enneagram type influences this tendency, and best of all, walk through a practical anxiety exercise with Christa to help you create healthy space while maintaining deep connection. Whether you're feeling anxious about your partner's every mood shift or struggling with boundary issues, this episode offers compassionate guidance for finding that sweet spot where both individuals can thrive within the relationship. Head on over to ⁠⁠⁠https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/⁠⁠⁠ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠@enneagramandmarriage⁠⁠⁠ | ⁠⁠⁠Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage ⁠⁠⁠ Have a specific question? ⁠⁠⁠⁠Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! ⁠⁠⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to ⁠⁠enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com⁠⁠. (You can use your Voice Memos app on your iPhone to record.) Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠ , here!⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Episoder(597)

Beloved and Imperfect: Meredith Hite Estevez, Loving One Another As Works of God's Art

As a special invitation in the middle of our summer exploring desire and intimacy in marriage, Christa pauses to learn from and to share an experience with a soulful friend, welcoming Meredith Hite E...

17 Jul 44min

Play as a Path Back to Desire: How Fun Reignites Your Sexual Intimacy

Today, Christa reveals the surprising other half of the connection coin when it comes to sexual intimacy: desire does not only need safety, it needs aliveness. Christa names the play deficit that cree...

15 Jul 16min

Seen, Known, and Wanted: The Three Keys to Real Sexual Intimacy

Why do so many couples feel stuck in the bedroom even after decades of marriage? Christa goes straight at the real reason in this episode, the armor we put on to avoid being truly seen. Being physical...

13 Jul 22min

Afterglow: The 48 Hours That Change Your Marriage

We tend to think of physical intimacy as a moment, here and then gone. But the research reveals it is actually a window, a lingering afterglow that lasts up to forty-eight hours, and what happens insi...

8 Jul 21min

Initiation: Who Reaches, Who Pulls Back, and Why

Almost every couple navigates it, and almost nobody talks about it openly: the vulnerable dance of initiation. Who reaches for whom, who tends to pull back, and the quiet hurt that builds around it ov...

6 Jul 21min

Lighting (Safe but Sexy) Fireworks in Your Marriage

Today we open the July series on sexual intimacy, and there's no better week for lighting the (safe but sexy) fireworks. Not the ones in the sky, the ones in your marriage. Christa dismantles the myth...

1 Jul 22min

The Foundation Before the (Sexual) Fireworks

This is the turning point of the Summer of Intimacy, the bridge from everything we have built in June into the sexual intimacy series beginning in July. But this episode names something deeper that ha...

29 Jun 22min

Two Essential Paths to Intimacy: Joy and Connection

In this crowning summer episode every listener needs to lean in for, Christa unpacks the two paths back to each other: connection, the path of being deeply known, grounded in John Gottman's research o...

24 Jun 20min