E207 The Foreplay Episode: The 5 Things We’re All Getting Wrong
Pillow Talks8 Mai 2025

E207 The Foreplay Episode: The 5 Things We’re All Getting Wrong

Ready for our go-to masterclass on one of the most overlooked (but absolutely essential) parts of intimacy? We’re bringing back one of our most downloaded episodes of all time — and trust us, it’s worth a re-listen (or a first-time bender if you’re new around here). Foreplay — the most misunderstood, rushed-through, and skipped-over part of sex. But here’s the truth: foreplay isn’t optional. It’s not just a warm-up. It’s the whole damn vibe. In this episode, we’re breaking down the 5 biggest mistakes couples make when it comes to foreplay — and how to turn things around so it actually feels good (for both of you). Here’s what we’re diving into: Why “just get to the point” is killing the vibe What makes receiving foreplay so hard (especially for women — hi, it’s not your fault) The most common foreplay ruts we all fall into How to make foreplay fun again — not forced, awkward, or performative A mindset shift that will change how you think about sex forever Whether you’re feeling stuck, unsure what your partner wants, or just ready for a heck of a lot more pleasure… this episode is your permission slip. Links & Resources: 🔥 The Ultimate Foreplay Guides ➡︎ https://buy.vmtherapy.com/ultimate-foreplay-guides?ref=podcast-207&utm_term=podcast-207 Stay Connected: 📸 Follow us on Instagram @vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns 👉🏻 Sign up here! 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods! ================================= THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ================================= 👏Thanks Beam. Get up to 40% off for a limited time ➡︎ https://shopbeam.com/PILLOW 👏 Thanks Hungryroot. Get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life ➡︎ https://hungryroot.com/pillow 👏Thanks Cozy Earth. Get an exclusive discount for up to 40% off. ➡︎ https://cozyearth.com/pillowtalks 👏Thanks Alloy. Get $20 off your first order today. ➡︎ https://myalloy.com/PILLOW Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Episoder(275)

E275: Reasonable or Ridiculous? Sex Quotas, Oral Every Time, and Dirty Talk Dealbreakers

E275: Reasonable or Ridiculous? Sex Quotas, Oral Every Time, and Dirty Talk Dealbreakers

It's time for another round of Reasonable or Ridiculous, where we take real life couple disagreements our community members just can't settle and play referee. In this episode, you'll hear: Can...

27 Aug 50min

E274: Is it Normal to Not Orgasm During Sex? We Got Attacked for Talking About This

E274: Is it Normal to Not Orgasm During Sex? We Got Attacked for Talking About This

We recently shared a reel answering a question from a woman who didn’t orgasm during sex. The comments section turned into something we've never experienced in over ten years of doing this, including ...

20 Aug 1h 6min

E273: How to Try New Sex Positions Without Killing the Mood

E273: How to Try New Sex Positions Without Killing the Mood

This week we're answering all your questions about trying new positions, from how to introduce something new when you've been together forever, to why switching things up can kill the mood, to the pil...

13 Aug 1h

E272: What Do Men Really Think About….? (Part 5) Rough Sex, Vibrators, and What Turns Them Off

E272: What Do Men Really Think About….? (Part 5) Rough Sex, Vibrators, and What Turns Them Off

It’s time for another episode of What Do Men Really Think About… and Xander’s back in the hot seat to answer your burning questions about preferences, fantasies, the death grip, and how to give better...

6 Aug 57min

E271: The Real Reason You Can't "Let Go" in Bed

E271: The Real Reason You Can't "Let Go" in Bed

You're finally in bed together, but you can’t stop thinking about tomorrow's to-do list. We've all heard the advice to “just let go”. Stop thinking, stop controlling, lose yourself. But 80% of you...

30 Jul 50min

E270: The 5 Silent Relationship Killers That Turn Partners Into Roommates

E270: The 5 Silent Relationship Killers That Turn Partners Into Roommates

We ran a poll and 67% of couples told us they feel more like roommates than partners. This week we're walking through our D.R.I.F.T. Framework: the 5 silent relationship killers that chip away at int...

23 Jul 56min

E269: Tie-Breakers: We Referee Your Realest Relationship Standoffs

E269: Tie-Breakers: We Referee Your Realest Relationship Standoffs

Every couple has that one thing they’ll argue about until the end of time. TV in the bedroom. How to load the dishwasher. Can men and women just be friends? 👀 We asked our community to send us the...

16 Jul 1h 1min

E268: Ask Us Anything: Only Fans, The Ick, & Creeps In The Comments

E268: Ask Us Anything: Only Fans, The Ick, & Creeps In The Comments

It’s Xander’s birthday! And this week for our Ask Us Anything episode, we decided to answer some of your personal questions! This one really pulls back the curtain on us as a couple. Ready for honest...

9 Jul 1h 6min

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