What Dating Securely Has Taught Me

What Dating Securely Has Taught Me

In this personal episode, I take you behind the scenes of a recent dating experience that stirred up both growth and grief — and revealed just how far I’ve come on my attachment healing journey.

As someone who used to operate from a fearful avoidant (leaning anxious) attachment style, I now move through dating with much more self-trust, clarity, and compassion. But that doesn’t mean the old patterns don’t still surface — especially when connection, chemistry, and unmet needs collide.

I’ll walk you through how I navigated this dynamic from a secure place, the conversations I had, and ultimately, how I honored myself enough to walk away when alignment wasn’t there — even when it felt good in the moment.

If you’ve ever struggled to balance attraction with long-term compatibility, or felt pulled between your heart and your values, this episode is for you.

Takeaways include:

  • The difference between chemistry and compatibility

  • How to identify your unmet needs in real time

  • Why even "kind and available" people might not be the right fit

  • What it looks like to actually date from your secure self

  • How to exit with integrity when your paths don’t align

🎧 Plus: Only 2 more days to join the My Secure Self Membership for just $1 your first month! Get access to group coaching, monthly workshops, and tools to help you build secure, aligned relationships HERE.


Looking for 1:1 support, learn more about attachment coaching here.

Denne episoden er hentet fra en åpen RSS-feed og er ikke publisert av Podme. Den kan derfor inneholde annonser.

Episoder(157)

Secure Attachment Taught Me Discernment

Secure Attachment Taught Me Discernment

In this episode, I’m talking about one of the biggest lessons secure attachment has taught me: discernment. I share how my past relationship patterns shaped the way I chose love, how I’ve learned to s...

31 Aug 23min

Temperament vs. Attachment: Are You Really Anxious or Avoidant?

Temperament vs. Attachment: Are You Really Anxious or Avoidant?

In this episode, we’re exploring the difference between temperament and attachment and how qualities like independence, sensitivity, introversion, emotional intensity, or a need for connection can int...

24 Aug 20min

The Avoidant's Biggest Lie: "I'm Trapped"

The Avoidant's Biggest Lie: "I'm Trapped"

Why does healthy love sometimes feel suffocating?In this episode, we're exploring one of the biggest misconceptions behind avoidant attachment: the belief that feeling trapped automatically means some...

8 Aug 14min

The Ugly Truth About Healing Attachment Wounds

The Ugly Truth About Healing Attachment Wounds

You finally meet someone who's consistent, emotionally available, and genuinely cares about you... so why does your nervous system want to run?In this episode, I break down why healing attachment woun...

26 Jun 13min

What God Taught Me About Secure Attachment

What God Taught Me About Secure Attachment

In this episode, I share what God taught me about secure attachment, why people will inevitably let us down, and how finding security in something greater than ourselves can transform the way we exper...

14 Jun 8min

Lessons From Dating an Avoidant and an Anxious Partner

Lessons From Dating an Avoidant and an Anxious Partner

In this episode, I share the lessons I've learned from dating both avoidant and anxious partners, how each relationship highlighted different areas for growth, and why the goal isn't hyper-independenc...

10 Jun 13min

Why Anxious + Avoidant Relationships Can Work

Why Anxious + Avoidant Relationships Can Work

Are anxious and avoidant relationships really doomed, or have we oversimplified the conversation?In this episode, Jessica explores why attachment styles alone don't determine relationship success, the...

5 Jun 17min

The Paradox of Avoidant Healing: Learning to Lean Into Intimacy Despite the Fear

The Paradox of Avoidant Healing: Learning to Lean Into Intimacy Despite the Fear

In this episode, we explore the paradox of avoidant healing and why intimacy can feel both deeply comforting and deeply threatening at the same time.We talk about:why avoidant attachers often push awa...

12 Mai 12min

Populært innen Fakta

fastlegen
dine-penger-pengeradet
relasjonspodden-med-dora-thorhallsdottir-kjersti-idem
treningspodden
jakt-og-fiskepodden
foreldreradet
rss-orjasater
rss-strid-de-norske-borgerkrigene
tomprat-med-gunnar-tjomlid
sinnsyn
hverdagspsyken
rss-var-forste-kaffe
rss-kunsten-a-leve
mikkels-paskenotter
gravid-uke-for-uke
rss-impressions-2
fryktlos
hr-podden-2
kvallm
hagespiren-podcast