# 160 - From the Cafeteria to the Mahj Table: Friend Group Challenges from Teens to Midlife and Beyond (LIVE!)

My dream for "Dear Nina" has always been to make people feel less alone in the messy parts of friendship. Episode #160 was our first-ever LIVE show with 120 people in the room—and wow, you could feel the energy, see the heads nodding, and appreciate the camaraderie of an audience who has experienced the highs and lows of friend groups.

Friend groups are complicated. They can be the source of safety, belonging, and joy. But they can also be a source of exclusion, hurt, and longing. With my assistant producer and friend, Rebekah Jacobs, we dug into the messy, funny, and universal realities of friend groups from middle school cafeterias to mahj tables and even to the dining hall at the assisted living center.

Why do groups feel so good AND so painful? Do you really need one to belong? And how do you help your kids (or yourself) when a group just isn’t working? This episode has laughter, applause, and some tough-but-true advice: go where the love is.

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Dear Nina Newsletter (dearnina.substack.com)
• Facebook: Dear Nina: The Group
• Dr. Lisa Damour on Dear Nina, episode #65
• Gretchen Rubin on Dear Nina, episode #96
• My episode on Leslie Randolph's podcast, "Why Didn't They Tell Us?" episode #63: "Friendships and Fitting In"
• "Is There a Gentle Way to Drop a Friend" episode 156 of the Ask Lisa Podcast
• The final poem I read was from author Amy Weatherly of "Sister, I am With You." It can be found on their Facebook page, here. You can also hear Amy and Jess on Dear Nina, episode #86.

SPECIAL THANK YOU to our North Shore live show sponsors & partners!

🍹 @drinktwistedalchemy – cold-pressed juices at the bar

🥂 @inspirotequila – crafted the signature cocktails

🍰 @glickmanlevyresidential – sponsored the gorgeous dessert bar

👗 @enazboutique – donated 15% of sales to the National Pediatric Cancer Foundation

And thank you to these generous companies for contributing to the swag bags and/or the raffle!

@workflowsbyronna, @dr.julia.milman, @glickmanlevyresidential, @kiddlessports, @lainetoo, @maijamartinphotography, @ohhappydayconfections, @pvolvedeerfield, @get_rootz, @rosshighlandpark, @talacoffeeroasters, @enazboutique

ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO

📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina

📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack

❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group

📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question

🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here.

Thank you to this week's sponsor: SINCERENOTES. SincereNotes is available to download free on Google Play and App store. Special thank you, as always, to my assistant producer, Rebekah Jacobs!