Pillow Talks25 Sep 2025

E227: Initiation: What You’re Getting Wrong And How To Get It Right

Hot take: when you finally get initiation right, your entire sex life opens up. Think about it. No more awkward “was that supposed to be a signal?” moments. No more pressure on just one person to get things started. And no more cycle of rejection and resentment. When initiation feels fun, confident, and mutual, everything else in your sex life starts to feel easier, more connected, and a lot more exciting. We’re back with a re-air of one of our most popular episodes ever, because initiation is one of the biggest challenges couples face. 💛 In this episode, you’ll learn: The biggest mistakes couples make when it comes to initiation (and what to do instead). Why one partner often feels all the pressure, and how to change it up and share the spark. How to shift from frustration and rejection to connection and desire. Practical strategies to make initiation feel exciting, flirty, fun, and hot again. If you’ve ever felt frustrated, annoyed, or even rejected by your partner’s initiation attempts (or lack of them), this conversation will help you see both sides of the equation and give you totally do-able techniques you can try tonight. 🔥 $40 FLASH SALE : Art Of Initiation 🔥 We’re doing something we’ve never done before. For this weekend only, get our top-selling course, Art of Initiation, for just $40 (normally $89). That’s more than 50% off! Now through Sunday, September 28, 2025 Inside, you’ll learn how to initiate in ways that actually feel amazing for both of you. Trust us, it’s a total game-changer. 👉 Grab AOI here: vmtherapy.com/initiation and use code FLASH40 at checkout. Links & Resources 👉 E73: Do You Ever “Owe” Sex To Your Partner?: https://vmtherapy.com/episode73 👉 What’s Your Sex Drive Type? Free Download: https://free.vmtherapy.com/sex-drive-type 👉 E38: You Want Connection, Your Partner Wants Sex. Who Comes First?: https://vmtherapy.com/episode38 👉 E183: How To Get More Emotional Intimacy From Your Partner https://vmtherapy.com/episode183 🎧 Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns. Sign up here 👉🏻 vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods. ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks Skims. Shop SKIMS Fits Everybody collection at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows. ➡︎https://www.skims.com/pillow 👏Thanks goPure. Use the code PILLOW to get 25% off ➡︎https://gopure.com 👏Thanks Cowboy Colostrum. Get 25% off when you use the code PILLOW. ➡︎https://www.cowboycolostrum.com 👏Thanks Hungryroot. Use code pillow to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life➡︎https://Hungryroot.com/pillow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Episoder(266)

E266: Ask a Sex Therapist (Part 3) Sex Pillows, Squirting, and Standing-Up Sex

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E265: Is This Cheating? (Part 3) Emotional Affairs, Secret Texts, and Sneaky DMs

Have you and your partner ever actually sat down and defined what counts as cheating? Most of us never do, which is exactly why the gray areas get so complicated. We're back with Part 3 of Is This C...

18 Jun 56min

E264: What Women Really Think About... Part 3

So we're back with Part 3 of What Do Women Really Think About…?, giving you the honest answers women don't always say out loud. From the mental load to mirror selfies, nothing’s off limits. 💛 I...

11 Jun 1h 5min

E263: How to Have More Fun in Your Relationship

When was the last time you and your partner did something purely for fun? Not productive, not logistical, not about the kids, just fun. If you had to think about it for a beat, you're not alone. Mo...

4 Jun 56min

E262: The Sex Personality Quiz Every Couple Needs (And What Your Type Says About You)

Ever feel like you and your partner are speaking totally different languages when it comes to sex? One of you wants spontaneity, the other needs to feel emotionally close first. One of you craves nove...

28 Mai 1h 7min

E261: ED, PE & Everything In Between: Your Performance Problems Solved (Part 2)

The response to our first episode on penis performance problems was so big that we knew we had to come back for round two. In this episode, we're getting into the practical stuff: what to do in the...

21 Mai 58min

E260: How To Orgasm Like A Man: Breaking The Blocks That Keep Women Stuck

For a lot of women, orgasm feels like this mysterious thing that either happens or it doesn't. Nobody taught you how. And somewhere along the way, you picked up the idea that your pleasure is complica...

14 Mai 1h 5min

E259: Sex and Intimacy After Kids: What Actually Works (From Parents Who've Figured It Out)

This one's for the sleep-deprived, the time-starved, the diaper-changing, homework-helping parents who still want to feel like a couple. We see you. And we asked our community to help us show up fo...

7 Mai 1h 3min