1724 || delayed grief || healing the shame that binds you
delayed grief is how we end up creating false selves. it's our job to grieve fully, so we can release the attachments to our denial. connectedness, validation, and support are the way through. John Br...
27 Mar 10min
1723 || connection is the antidote || healing the shame that binds you
in order to be healed, we must come out of isolation. identity formation is a social process, so unraveling toxic shame is also a social process. - John BradshawJohn Bradshaw's website.Buy the book, ...
26 Mar 10min
1722 || you gotta feel it to heal it || healing the shame that binds you
As long as our shame is hidden, there is nothing we can do about it. “The only way out is through.” "Embracing our shame involves pain. Pain is what we try to avoid. In fact, most of our neurotic beha...
25 Mar 11min
1721 || when the emotion becomes addictive || healing the shame that binds you
"Being nice is primarily a way of manipulating people and situations." - John Bradshaw"Perfectionism flows from the core of toxic shame. A perfectionist has no sense of healthy shame; he has no intern...
24 Mar 11min
1720 || our culture of shame || healing the shame that binds you
Our culture does not handle emotions well. We like folks to be happy and fine. We learn rituals of acting happy and fine at an early age. I can remember many times telling people “I’m fine,” when I fe...
21 Mar 11min
1719 || shame spirals
Sometimes, "“I feel shame” comes to mean “I am shameful, deficient in some vital way as a human being.” Shame is no longer one feeling among many, but comes to constitute the core of oneself. Internal...
20 Mar 12min
1718 || generational shame || book club
We can't heal what we don't feel. Unfortunately, one of the greatest powers of toxic shame is that it creates automatic, unconscious defenses: like Idealization, repression, denial, dissociation. So m...
19 Mar 11min
1717 || when shame is a demon || book club
The more one experiences shame, the more one is ashamed, and the beat goes on. It is this dead-end quality of shame that makes it so hopeless. But it's not hopeless, it just feels like it.“Without fee...
18 Mar 10min
