Episode 68: HA HA I HAVE A HUGE DICK with the very thoughtful Blake
Sexplanations Podcast9 Nov 2018

Episode 68: HA HA I HAVE A HUGE DICK with the very thoughtful Blake

Let's talk about gender and biosex and sex assigned at birth and anatomy and surgery and language. In this episode Blake, FTM, and I a ciswoman pull apart what we experience on a day to day basis to develop a better world for the future. For part of the episode I go through the criteria of gender dysphoria as outlined in the DSM 5. Here there are if you'd like to follow along: In adolescents and adults gender dysphoria diagnosis involves a difference between one’s experienced/expressed gender and assigned gender, and significant distress or problems functioning. It lasts at least six months and is shown by at least two of the following: 1. A marked incongruence between one’s experienced/expressed gender and primary and/or secondary sex characteristics 2. A strong desire to be rid of one’s primary and/or secondary sex characteristics 3. A strong desire for the primary and/or secondary sex characteristics of the other gender 4. A strong desire to be of the other gender 5. A strong desire to be treated as the other gender 6. A strong conviction that one has the typical feelings and reactions of the other gender Why does Blake identify as FTM rather than a transman? "While I’m not offended if someone refers to me as a transman, I prefer to say I’m FTM, or a female-to-male trans person. The main reason is that the term FTM just feels correct. It sounds right when I say it. It feels authentic. I don’t get that “it fits” feeling with transman, non-binary, or any other gendery word. However, it’s okay if my experience seems familiar to you and you do use a different term than I do. Or if you’re FTm and your experience is nothing like mine. We’re equally valid. I just know what fits for me. I don’t feel that my gender is particularly “man”, and I struggle to relate to most men, cis or trans. I know that I get the “it fits” feeling with my current name, Blake, but not with my birth name. He/him/his pronouns fit too. They/them doesn’t bother me, but doesn’t feel as correct as he/him. Being called she/her causes me pain. When I had breasts, I knew that I’d feel more correct without them, so I removed them, and I do indeed feel more at home in my own body now. I was similarly confident about not wanting my uterus and ovaries. I have mixed feelings about the idea of having/obtaining a penis. I rarely feel pain/dysphoria when I see my own genitalia, but I do wish that I didn’t have to worry about having this genitalia - I wish men’s bathrooms had more stalls, I wish my genitals weren’t remarkable or confusing to doctors or potential sexual partners, but I don’t hate having a vulva. I’m not always comfortable with other people interacting with it, though I often am, but I find that the most emotionally fulfilling sex for me involves me penetrating another person with a “realistic” phallus. It’s how I feel most sexually fulfilled, even if that means my genitals aren’t stimulated by another person and/or I don’t have an orgasm. But having a penis 24/7 seems really inconvenient, honestly, and I don’t like the feeling of wearing a packer. I like the look of a bulge on me, but not enough to wear a packer. I like that I was “born female” and I wouldn’t change it. I like using a term that has female in it. I am thankful to have been raised as a girl. I didn’t feel like anything but a girl, until I realized that I’d never thought about it. But by then, I’d spent 18 years avoiding boys. Boys were mean to me. Men scare me. So using a term with “man” in it feels less authentic, and I don’t want to be them or be like them. Manhood isn’t appealing to me, even though much of “male”-ness feels essential to me."

Avsnitt(94)

Episode 14: COINING "GOMORRAHY" with comic edutainer Charley Macorn

Episode 14: COINING "GOMORRAHY" with comic edutainer Charley Macorn

Charley identifies as non-binary. Lindsey loves words. Together the two of them go through sex terms they've heard of and ones that are new all the while making up their own language for the gaps in language. To follow along with the original Sexplanations video episode where Lindsey sings Red Rhapsody visit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-54bcNJOIYc&t And to support our unscripted educational conversations, please become a sexpla(i)naut at patreon.com/sexplanationspodcast.

18 Sep 201744min

Episode 13: "SO THIS VENTRILOQUIST..." with delightfully curious co-host Sarah Aswell

Episode 13: "SO THIS VENTRILOQUIST..." with delightfully curious co-host Sarah Aswell

Sarah Aswell is one of the leading ladies in our local comedy scene and a captivating freelance writer. She sat down with me and we got to talk about being orgasmic, whether or not vaginal orgasms are real, what suggestions we have for people with anorgasmia, our thoughts on vibrators, our thoughts on food, and how not all of orgasm's history is as good as they feel. Sextra Credit: Talk to others about orgasming nonchalantly and draw vulvas on the windshields of your car's dirt. Or not, we're all about consent and safey here on the Sexplanations Podcast. Ancora Imparo. Book I referenced: What Wild Ecstasy: The rise and fall of the sexual revolution by John Heidenry

8 Sep 201746min

Episode 12: PURPLE VAGINAS with guest co-host Michael Aranda

Episode 12: PURPLE VAGINAS with guest co-host Michael Aranda

Michael Aranda is curious. He wants to know why he has two testicles instead of one or three. He wants to know why biosex females are more likely to experience a sex flush than biosex males. Why does his erection look different than an Chinese heuristic? But Dr. Doe can't convince him to investigate the change in color of vaginas. Keep learning with us. Ancora imparo.

1 Sep 201750min

Episode 11: ETHICAL SLUTTERY with sex educator extraordinaire Reid Mihalko

Episode 11: ETHICAL SLUTTERY with sex educator extraordinaire Reid Mihalko

This consensual conversation about sex includes correlations between sex and college, how throws play parties, what asking for what you want sexually can look like, and pubic muscle building. Sextra Credit: 1) Learn the Inverted Vulcan by going to reidaboutsex.com/vulcan and sign up for Reid's newsletter to get a free video about how to perform the Inverted Vulcan. 2) Share this episode of the podcast with a friend

25 Aug 201747min

Episode 10: MASTURBATING ON A BALCONY featuring Shannon Boodram

Episode 10: MASTURBATING ON A BALCONY featuring Shannon Boodram

Dr. Doe talks with Shan Boodram (a fellow clinical sexologist and YouTuber) about the importance of sex education and their dream novels they each want to write.

18 Aug 201738min

Episode 9: HOW WE BECAME SEXOLOGISTS with Dr. Hernando Chaves

Episode 9: HOW WE BECAME SEXOLOGISTS with Dr. Hernando Chaves

Dr. Doe and Dr. Chaves went to sex school in their twenties and they've enjoyed being sexologists. This episode is a reflection on the paths they took and their recommendations for those who are curious about the career.

11 Aug 201741min

Episode 8: PUT A FINGER ON IT featuring Matthew Gaydos

Episode 8: PUT A FINGER ON IT featuring Matthew Gaydos

Clinical sexologist Dr. Doe gets the giggles listening to the producer of Sexplanations, Matthew Gaydos, answer your sex questions. Sextra Credit: Answer the questions yourself. Q: What does "sexually active" mean? Q: Who do you have sex with? Q: Is there something people do in their sex lives that they think is good but you think is dysfunctional? Q: How do I get my sex drive back? Q: How can I learn about sexuality without experimenting? Q: Can you explain asexuality? Q: Does anyone else think speculums look like a duck? Q: What can I do if I'm allergic to latex? Q: How do I get started masturbating? Q: What is the how-to on vaginal hygiene? Q: What is the difference between an STI and an STD? Q: Do I have to do anything differently with a condom if I have a foreskin? Q: How can we know we're being safe and doing it right? Q: What do you masturbate to? Q: What should I know about choosing a dildo? Q: Can you talk about periods? Q: What are the pros and cons of the birth control pill? Q: Where do I go to talk about my asexuality? Q: What's the best way to clean out sebum before it turns into smegma? Q: Can you eat smegma? Q: How come when I finger myself, it feels completely different than when my partner fingers me? Q: Can you get pregnant from a handjob or a blowjob? Q: Can you lose your virginity to a speculum? Q: What is BDSM? Q: What do you think about sapiosexuality? Q: What are your thoughts on shaving pubic hair? Q: How do you feel about sex for recreation? Q: How do you feel about the legality of prostitution? Q: How do you go about choosing a dildo?

7 Aug 201747min

Episode 7: HOLD UP, DID YOU SAY GENITALS? featuring Eden Atwood

Episode 7: HOLD UP, DID YOU SAY GENITALS? featuring Eden Atwood

Eden Atwood is an intersex woman. She was born with androgen insensitivity and internal testes so her body, like 2% of the population isn't male or female.

28 Juli 201746min

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