When It All Goes Wrong: Effective Conflict Resolution

When It All Goes Wrong: Effective Conflict Resolution

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00:01:18 In an article published in the Journal of Managerial Sciences in 2009

00:01:48 The Different Types of Conflict

00:02:02 Not all conflict is the same—take a look at some variants: Affective Conflict

00:02:23 Substantive Conflict

00:02:45 Conflict of Interest

00:03:02 Retributive Conflict

00:03:19 Conflict in Values

00:03:33 Goal Conflict

00:03:39 Displaced Conflict

00:04:29 The Thomas Kilmann Model

00:05:34 1. Competing

00:06:22 2. Avoiding

00:07:17 3. Accommodating

00:08:01 4. Collaboration

00:08:48 5. Compromising

00:09:36 VOMP

00:09:58 Ventilation

00:10:48 Ownership

00:11:53 Moccasins

00:12:20 Plan

00:14:24 Uh Oh—We Talked and There’s Still Conflict

00:15:21 How to Master High-Stakes Discussions and Stabilize Intense Emotions

00:19:17 How to Navigate a Crucial Conversation

• Conflict is inevitable whenever people differ, but it can be managed with grace and tact. Try to understand the type of conflict: affective, substantive, conflict of interest, retributive, conflict in values, goal conflict, or displaced conflict from somewhere else.

• According to the Thomas Kilmann model, people come into conflict simply because they have different ideas, values, motivations, or wants. There are five conflict-resolution strategies according to degree of empathy and assertiveness: competing, avoiding, accommodating, collaborating, and compromising. Each has pros and cons and is best used in specific circumstances. Compromising (medium assertiveness and medium empathy) is usually a good bet all around.


#Affective #Collaboration #Compromising #Conflict #CrosbyKerrMinnoConsulting #DisplacedConflict #Emotion #Empathy #GoalConflict #Kilmann #ProfessorAbdulGhaffar #QurtubaUniversity #RalphKilmann #RetributiveConflict #ThomasKilmann #Ventilation #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #HowtoSpeakEffectively #WhenItAllGoesWrong:EffectiveConflictResolutionPatrickKing

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The Pyramid Of Needs

The Pyramid Of Needs

Next, we move to the pyramid of needs, otherwise known as Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. It states that we are all seeking various types of needs in various points in our lives; when you can observe which level other people are in, you can understand what they are seeking out and motivated by. The levels of the hierarchy are as follows: physiological fulfillment, safety, love and belonging, self-esteem, and self-actualization. Of course, this model, as well as the next one, also functions based on the pleasure principle.Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/readpeoplekingShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotesLearn more or get a free mini-book on conversation tactics at https://bit.ly/pkconsulting#AbrahamMaslow #InterpersonalRelationships #Maslow #PhysicalSafety #PhysiologicalFulfillment #Selfactualization #ThePyramidOfNeeds #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #HowtoReadPeopleLikeaBook

6 Apr 202210min

Selflessness Is Sexy

Selflessness Is Sexy

Despite our own internal confusions, there are certain scientifically proven traits we do seek in mates that are more related to biological imperatives. We are subconsciously drawn to excitement and arousal, fulfilling gender-specific arousal triggers, a sense of humor, and masculine and feminine voices. Research shows that while smiling and expressing happiness can make people like and trust you, when it comes to relationships and dating, this is not always the case: men find smiling, happy women most sexually attractive, but women tend to rate as more attractive those men who express pride (i.e., competence and self-assuredness) and shame (lowered gaze and awareness of social norms). At least initially, expressing happiness is theorized to convey a lack of status or dominance. Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/ScienceOfAttractionShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotesLearn more or get a free mini-book on conversation tactics at https://bit.ly/pkconsulting#AlecBeall #Beall #EmotionalMaturity #Selflessness #SelflessnessIsSexy #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #TheScienceofAttraction

4 Apr 202212min

Listening And Nonviolent Communication

Listening And Nonviolent Communication

The four principles of Marshall Rosenberg’s non-violent communication are: observations, feelings, needs, and requests, in that order. First make neutral observations instead of judgmental evaluations. Next, seek to explore feelings and not opinions. Be careful about using “you” statements or attributing blame, and instead take responsibility for your own experience. Next, connect your feelings with any unmet needs with the format: “I feel X because I need Y.” Finally, end with a respectful and reasonable request focused on your needs. Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/IntentionalCommunicationKingShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotesLearn more or get a free mini-book on conversation tactics at https://bit.ly/pkconsulting#Communicate #Communication #ConflictResolutions #EffectiveCommunication #Listening #MarshallRosenbergs #NonviolentCommunication #NonviolentCommunicationFramework #ListeningAndNonviolentCommunication #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #IntentionalCommunication

1 Apr 202212min

Our Inner Child Still Lives

Our Inner Child Still Lives

Any discussion on motivation must begin with the pleasure principle, which generally states that we move toward pleasure and move away from pain. If you think about it, this is omnipresent in our daily lives in both minuscule and huge ways. As such, this actually makes people more predictable to understand. What is the pleasure people are seeking, and what is the pain they are avoiding? It’s always there in some way.Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/readpeoplekingShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotesLearn more or get a free mini-book on conversation tactics at https://bit.ly/pkconsulting#Motivation #PleasurePainPrinciple #PleasurePrinciple #OurInnerChildStillLives #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #HowtoReadPeopleLikeaBook

30 Mars 202218min

Triggers For Attraction And Arousal

Triggers For Attraction And Arousal

Despite our own internal confusions, there are certain scientifically proven traits we do seek in mates that are more related to biological imperatives. We are subconsciously drawn to excitement and arousal, fulfilling gender-specific arousal triggers, a sense of humor, and masculine and feminine voices. Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/ScienceOfAttractionShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotesLearn more or get a free mini-book on conversation tactics at https://bit.ly/pkconsulting#AlbrightCollege #Arousal #ArthurAron #Attraction #AttractiveFemale #BiologicalDifferences #DesirableTraits #DonaldDutton #EmilyNagoski #FemaleSexualArousal #GenderDifference #PhysicalArousal #ResponsiveSexualArousal #SexualArousal #DrSusanHughes #TriggersForAttractionAndArousal #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #TheScienceofAttraction

28 Mars 202211min

Question Yourself. Question Others.

Question Yourself. Question Others.

Immersing yourself in someone else’s equally valid reality is harder than it looks, and so we need to routinely test our own assumptions. We need to ask people questions and challenge our own assumptions about what they think or feel or how we attribute their actions. Psychologizing people is a way we can believe we’re listening compassionately, but actually we’re forcing our interpretation or worldview onto another person instead of genuinely listening to their experience. Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/IntentionalCommunicationKingShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotesLearn more or get a free mini-book on conversation tactics at https://bit.ly/pkconsulting#CompassionateConcern #ConstructiveFeedback #GoodListener #HarmfulAssumptions #IntentionalCommunication #MentalModels #QuestionYourself.QuestionOthers. #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #IntentionalCommunication

25 Mars 20228min

It’s Okay To Be Uncertain

It’s Okay To Be Uncertain

Confirmation bias is also the most prominent way that we fail to simply follow the evidence. If we perform research and keep an open mind, our task is simple: just follow the arrows where they point. But all too often, we are seduced into following the wrong arrows. These include the cognitive distortions of focusing on “must” and “should”, black-and-white thinking, the Dunning-Kruger Effect, and labeling. Hear it Here - https://adbl.co/3n6a2fzShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotesLearn more or get a free mini-book on conversation tactics at https://bit.ly/pkconsulting#ConfirmationBias #DavidDunning #DunningKrugerEffect #IndependentThinker #InterpersonalCommunications #JustinKruger #Kruger #It’SOkayToBeUncertain #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #TheIndependentThinker

23 Mars 202212min

Why Bother To Understand People At All?

Why Bother To Understand People At All?

We’ve talked about analyzing and predicting behavior based on people’s emotions and values, but what about motivation? It turns out there are a few prominent and fairly universal models of motivation that can give you a helpful framework to understand people with. When you can pinpoint what people are motivated by, you can see how everything leads back to it either directly or indirectly.Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/readpeoplekingShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotesLearn more or get a free mini-book on conversation tactics at https://bit.ly/pkconsulting#CarlJung #CompassionateUnderstanding #Jungian #PsychologicalDiscomfort #ShadowModel #WhyBotherToUnderstandPeopleAtAll #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #HowtoReadPeopleLikeaBook

21 Mars 202217min

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