Neurodivergence & Medical Gaslighting: It's Not All in Your Head | S6E10

Medical gaslighting is when your experience of your body is denied or dismissed by a medical professional. Neurodivergent people frequently experience this even though providers don't always realize the harm they're doing.

When we talk about neurodivergence, we usually focus on the mind — but what about the body? In this episode of our "Navigating Neurodiverse Love & Life" series, my co-host Mona Kay and I dive into the physical side of neurodivergence that too often gets dismissed, misunderstood, or flat-out ignored by the medical system.

From dysautonomia and migraines to depression as a physiological experience, Mona and I share our own lived experiences with bodies that don't regulate the way they're "supposed to." We discuss the gut-brain connection, pain sensitivity differences across the autism/ADHD spectrum, Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, seasonal affective disorder, hormones, and why so many of us have spent years feeling like we were "making it all up" — only to discover our symptoms were real all along.

I also share the story of a doctor who recently reached out wanting to learn more about his neurodivergent patients, and why that kind of curiosity gives me hope. We talk about medical gaslighting, why even well-meaning physicians miss the signs, and what needs to change in medical training so neurodivergent patients stop falling through the cracks.

Whether you're neurodivergent yourself, love someone who is, or you're a professional working with neurodivergent clients, this conversation is a reminder that validation changes everything.

📧 Send me your questions and stories: podcast@jodicarlton.com

🔗 Find me at jodicarlton.com (it's Jodi with an I — but even if you misspell it, you'll find me!)

🔗 Find Mona at neurodiverselove.com

If you're a physician or helping professional who wants to learn more about working with neurodivergent patients, reach out to me about joining the Neurodiverse Peer Professional Network.

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Additional Resources:

🔗 All Brains Belong: https://allbrainsbelong.org/

🔗 Clinicians Guide: Everything is Connected to Everything: Improving Healthcare for Autistic & ADHD Adults: https://allbrainsbelong.org/clinician-resources/

Chapters: 0:00 Teaser 0:26 Intro 1:21 Checking In 1:49 Neurodivergence & the Physical Body 2:20 Migraines & Dysautonomia 3:00 Depression as a Physical Experience 5:00 Depression Is Physical, Not Just Mental 5:54 What Is Dysautonomia? 6:40 Hormones, Menopause & Feeling Alone 7:32 Finding Knowledgeable Physicians 8:04 A Doctor Who Wants to Learn About Neurodivergence 9:31 Medical Gaslighting & Imposter Syndrome 10:00 Ehlers-Danlos & Connective Tissue 10:34 The Gut-Brain Connection 11:28 "You Are 100% Wrong" 13:23 Pain Sensitivity: Autistic vs. ADHD 14:06 Interoception & My Autistic Uncle 15:25 There's an Explanation for Your Partner's Sensitivities 16:28 Validation Changes Everything 17:11 Outro