When Grown-Ups Throw Tantrums: A Love Letter to Our Unmet Grief

This week’s Grief Heals episode is a deep breath, a full exhale, and a tender look at what happens when our inner eight-year-old is still running the show in a very grown-up life.

I’m talking about Chapter 6 of Mel Robbins’ book Let Them, where she explores “grown-ups who throw tantrums”—and of course, I couldn't help but look at it all through the lens of collective grief.

Because here’s the thing: Most of us were never taught that our big emotions are welcome. We weren’t held when we were heartbroken. We were told to “toughen up,” “move on,” or “be good.”

And now?Now we’re walking around in adult bodies with young, un-met, un-witnessed parts of us still aching to be seen.

So in this episode, I share stories from my own life—some tender, some raw—of what it’s looked like to bump up against those unmet parts in myself, in others, and in the systems we live and work inside.

It’s been humbling. It’s been hard. And it’s been holy.

Even if you don’t listen right now (or ever), I want you to know this:

Every time you shut down, avoid conflict, blow up, people please, or retreat into silence… it’s not a moral failing. It’s an emotional pattern born from unmet grief.

And those patterns? They can be witnessed. Loved. Rewritten. Not overnight—but with time, care, and grief met with compassion.

This episode isn’t just about tantrums. It’s about what happens when we start to honor the sacred responsibility of tending to our losses.

Because yes, grief is love.

And love heals—it really does.

Oh—and something new is coming:

I’ll be starting a Let Them Book Club soon, walking through Mel Robbins’ book with you through a grief-heals lens—no pressure to read or be perfect. Just a chance to slow down together, reflect, and notice.

So if you’re curious, if you’re hurting, if you’ve ever found yourself wondering, why am I like this?—this episode is a loving place to begin.